Have Parenting Questions? Ask a Parenting Counselor for Answers
Good afternoon. I first would like to let you know that I am not a psychologist or licensed to perform counseling in any way, and I am not intending to provide information as such. I am only a Parenting Expert on Just Answer, I am a mother of 4 and a child care provider, and all I can offer is my opinion and what I know about these kinds of issues.
I would say no, do not tell your 4 1/2 year old grand daughter that her father has anger management issues. Saying this could stick in her head, and she may even repeat it back to her father at some time. I would however explain to her what anger is, and what causes people to become angry (which could be an array of things).
At one point, I asked her what dad is angry about. She didn't have an answer, so we dropped it. In April, we were coerced by an attorney into skype visits, which violates the dad's protection order. Dad blew it by making demeaning remarks about mom, who was supervising those visits and the computer was shut down. The child was devastated, but we said that Dad didn't follow the rules of the visits and that it's not nice to say mean things about anyone. Child accepted that. I was just wondering what ese we could have said or could say in the future.If Dad has any more visits, they will be supervised by a professional. Still we need to know how to handle questions or statements made by the child.
What kinds of questions or statements does she make or ask?
Also, does or has dad ever talked abusive to his daughter?
so far, only that mom makes dad angry.
not directed at the child, only remarks about mom, which we saw for the first time, on skype.
I think that it would be best to explain to your grand daughter that just as she may get mad at people for different reasons, sometimes justifiable, and sometimes not, adults often get angry with one another for these same kinds of reasons. It would be best in these discussions however, even if she asks a direct question about her father's anger, that you speak about anger in general, as it relates to all people, and not single dad out. This would be best so not to make her feel as though she has to chose sides between the "angry parent", and "non angry parent".
I appreciate your services, but I think that JustAnswer is purposefully misleading in its
"template" for follow-up. Let them know that for me and I will contact them by phone to express my opinions on that subject. If you have an email address, I'll take that.