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KansasTherapist, LSCSW
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 566
Experience:  17 years experience with depression, abuse, and borderline.
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i have a 6 yr old son who gets often time tantrum he throws

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i have a 6 yr old son who gets often time tantrum he throws things from the table he screams and he pushes his little sister anything i should do to control his tantrum.
When children experience anger, frustration, fear, etc, those feeling tend to take complete control. The part of their brain that allows them to think through the problem is far from developed and they have few, if any, skills to mange their emotions. That leaves a parent with two issues to address. The first is to keep the child and everyone else safe. You can have a stance set aside where he needs to be when he's having a tantrum. It can be in his room, on the floor away from furniture or breakable things, in your lap, or if he likes it, wrapped in a blanket. The blanket thing is not to control him but to smooth him so it should be a option, not something the parent does to him.

The second thing a parent needs to do is teach some of those beginning self management skills. After a tantrum, when the child is calm, talk to them about using words to say how they feel rather than actions. Some examples can be given, like mad, hurt, disappointed, frustrated, scared, unhappy, and have some practice saying those things. "it hurts my feelings when sister takes my toys."

I hope this helps. If I'm going the wrong direction, please let me know.
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Customer: replied 5 years ago.

thank you for the helpful info. i need to ask another question about my daughter who is 12, she has a very loud voice which pops the ear drum who can i teach her to lower her voice.

Customer: replied 5 years ago.
i am still waiting for your reply.
I'm sorry, I didn't see the second part of your question until now. I'm assuming she's had her hearing tested. If not, that would be the first thing to do.

If her hearing is normal, perhaps it would help to have her record her voice when she's in a conversation with you. That way she will hear how she sounds. Then she can use the recorder to practice talking softer. Anytime you notice she's using a quieter voice, tell her you appreciate being softer.
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