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Just wanted to say that what you describe here is overwhelming for most people. No form of abuse should be tolerated, even less threats from a people with psychological problems plus addictions. You are totally right, you need to get extra support here, legal support and also to report to the police the harassment and abuse happening here. If things have escalated this much and for that long, It seems obvious to me that they would not improve but get worse, even more considering what you have already tried without any positive impact.
A key word here is “boundaries”. You need to set and keep them on a consistent basis in order to protect yourself from further abuse, and again, you would need to file a report to the police and request them to initiate a request if necessary for a judge to issue a restraining order so they would not be allowed to harass nor abuse you any longer without facing the fair consequences of their acts.
On the other hand you would need to get legal support through an attorney or a legal aid society to work on how the legal system could protect you better from it and what to do to regarding your decision do “disown” them.
It is an overwhelming situation, but when people, including our very adult children are just unwilling to even respect us, we need to continue to take good care of ourselves and protect from further abuse.
I support you.
What I really feel now is that I dont want them to have any claim against me or my estate should anything happen to me
Therefore I wondered whether there is some process whereby I can legally 'disown' them.
As I am a pensioner I cannot afford to engage solicitors. I dont think legal aid is available for this. Am I correct in this assumption?
False accusations were made to the DHSS (I am on pension credit), these were investigated by them and I was naturally cleared and they did tell me that further malicious accusations coming from this source would not be pursued in the future. They did suggest I go to the police over the threats of violence, I do have reference to this via email but I strongly suspect that the witness involved will refuse to give evidence.
I have written them out of my Will but my concern is that they should not have the ability to make a legal challenge to this after my death.