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proexpert37
proexpert37, Educator/Life Coach
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 1374
Experience:  Teacher 20+ years, Parent, Expert Mentor
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i am 41 years old and have a wonderful son 15 months old. My

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i am 41 years old and have a wonderful son 15 months old. My wife is younger than me and wants another child. The problem is that i have ALS (MND) and over the last 5 years have lost the use of my arms and hands. It is a deteriorating and ultimately terminal disease though i might have another 5 or another 30 years - only God knows. I try to be a good and involved father but most work falls on my wife's shoulders inc caring for me. She says with my moral support she can do anything. I worry about if i was not there. A sibling is good for any child but maybe it is irresponsible to bring a child into life in these circumstances

your frank views please
Submitted: 5 years ago.
Category: Parenting
Expert:  proexpert37 replied 5 years ago.
Hello and Thank You for using Just Answer. The greatest gift that you could give to your wife would be another child if you both truly want one. God willing, you will live a long life. However, your wife should be understanding to the fact that everything will be on he shoulders without you. If she can accept that fact, then bring that bundle of joy into the world. Your wife sounds a great woman and may be stronger than you realize!

Have a blessed day!
Customer: replied 5 years ago.

My concern is that the baby may resent me if i wasn't there/feel deserted. That plus the quality of life for the whole family. My wife hates to face worst scenarios and so responsibility for the outcome of any decision is mine.

 

Still not sure what is best. I don't want to fail as a father.

Expert:  proexpert37 replied 5 years ago.
Children learn to adapt to whatever situation they are faced with. If your wife can still be the provider and fill in the gaps, there should not be any need for concern. The new baby will not know any different. The decision should be made by both of you. Furthermore, a few counseling sessions may help you and your wife further express your feelings and understand the situation more.
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