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proexpert37, Educator/Life Coach
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 1374
Experience:  Teacher 20+ years, Parent, Expert Mentor
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How do I convience my 16 year old daughter to break ties with

Resolved Question:

How do I convience my 16 year old daughter to break ties with some of her friends. It seems she stays in constant trouble of some type through this association but it appears these friends are near and dear to her. Help please
Submitted: 5 years ago.
Category: Parenting
Expert:  proexpert37 replied 5 years ago.
Hello and Thank You for consulting Just Answer. How long has your daughter known these friends?
Customer: replied 5 years ago.
off and on 3 years i guess,
Expert:  proexpert37 replied 5 years ago.
Unfortunately, you cannot pick and choose your daughter's friends. As a parent, your job is to keep her safe. Your daughter wants to feel accepted by peers and is attracted to individuals that she shares common attributes with. If you tell your daughter that she cannot associate with certain individuals, that will only make upset and want to spend more time with her friends. If you verbally attack her friends, she will feel like you are attacking her as well. Therefore instead of specifically talking about certain friends, discuss the issue of their negative actions. Tell your daughter what you expect from her and what you will not tolerate. Continue to enforce consequences. Try to limit the free time that your daughter is spending with the friends. Continue to communicate in an open and honest manner with you daughter. Additionally if she seems to be headed in a downward spiral with her continued negative behavior, you may want to seek the assistance of a neutral third party like a counselor who can provide your daughter with a different perspective about her selection of friends.

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