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proexpert37, Educator/Life Coach
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 1374
Experience:  Teacher 20+ years, Parent, Expert Mentor
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I am concerned about my 11 year old son he has always struggled

Customer Question

I am concerned about my 11 year old son he has always struggled with being able to sit for long periods of times and i have always put it down to age. i have a younger son also and there is a difference in the the behaviour that they display. I have started childminding recently and this has caused new worries about his attention as compared to younger children he is less able to sit down and concentrate ,doing his homework is a battle as he does not appear to be able to follow the instructions unless i am sitting with him and helping him. I have tried letting him do his homework alone and he doesn't follow the instructions instead he does a version of how he thinks it should be. When we go out places he disappears in his own directions and i have to constantly tell him not to climb on things or mess with things he spins around on the trolley in the supermarket. i just feel like i am constantly on at him is it just normal behaviour for his age?
Submitted: 5 years ago.
Category: Parenting
Expert:  proexpert37 replied 5 years ago.
Hello and Thank You for using Just Answer. I am sorry to hear about the problems that your son is going through...How long has he been manifesting such behavior? Does he behave the same way at school and at home? Is he disrespectful? Thank you!
Customer: replied 5 years ago.
Yes he is quite disrespectful especially to me and to my mum who he has quite a close relationship with. He has.been like that for the last year or more but has always been fidgety really. I just have.t thought of it as a problem as I put it down to his age. He gets very tearful when it comes to doing his homework and calls himself thick and dumb. He gets frustated at school and gets told off for talking but says he is trying to tell others to be quiet last year he stormedout of the classroom in frustation as he said it swan.t him talking
Expert:  proexpert37 replied 5 years ago.
Thank you for the background information. Your son seems to be manifesting signs of Attention Deficit Disorder : the inattentive type. He is also showing signs of Oppositional Defiance Disorder. What you need to do, is to mention these two terms first to the psychologist at your son's school if one is available. Additionally, you will need to describe your son's behavior at home. The psychologist will observe your son at school. If there is no psychologist at school, then take your concerns to a different doctor for a second opinion as well as to an outside school child psychologist so that your son can be further evaluated. Once again, mention the terms ADD and ODD. I am almost certain that he would fall into one of those categories. If he did, then you would be provided with a road map of the next steps to take. At his age, it is much more than a maturity issue.