Parenting

Have parenting questions? Ask a parenting counselor for answers

Ask an Expert,
Get an Answer ASAP!

This answer was rated:

15 mo old grandson. We visited him, his mother and 27 mo old…

15 mo old grandson....
15 mo old grandson. We visited him, his mother and 27 mo old sister. Shortly after we arrive the boy threw a "normal" temper tantrum. He resisted all efforts to calm him so we ignored him and soon he was quiet, on hands and knees, face on the floor. I went to him and gradually got him to get up and come into my arms. All pretty normal.

15 minutes later he started again, no obvious reason, but this was totally different. He was more vocal and louder and very agressive toward all of us. He charged into each of us, repeatedly, one after another, full speed, hitting, pushing, grabbing, pulling hair, ripped my glasses off, screaming, crying and yelling all the while. The word that comes to mind is Berserker. I have never seen any thing like it. After 10 minutes or so, he quit, settled down, and behaved normally.

My wife is a physician and a psychiatrist, ( not child). She, nor the rest of us got a clue that he was in physical pain. He just seemed furiously angry, in the extreme. Anger directed at each of us, any of us, all of us.

Do you have any experience with this sort of thing?
Show More
Show Less
Ask Your Own Parenting Question
Answered in 22 minutes by:
11/21/2011
Dr. Paige
Dr. Paige, Psychologist
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 1,427
Experience: Psychologist; Parent
Verified
Hello. At this age, temper tantrums are considered normal. The most important factor as to if they will continue, is how it is handled by his parents or grandparents. it most likely is not physical pain. Children at this age are learning cause and effect and most likely is to see how adults will react. Was there something that he wanted? Attention? An object? It is important to try to identify any tantrum causing triggers and try to avoid them in the first place. Although there may not be an "apparent" reason, there most likely will be some sign he will give that one is coming. As long as the adult(s) involved remain calm and do not give in to any demands by the child, this should just be a phase.
Ask Your Own Parenting Question
Customer reply replied 6 years ago

Dr. Page,

 

Thanks for your response. However, I tried to make it clear that we had just seen a temper tantrum and this was something else. My description of this behaviour was not exagerated. It was extreme and frightening. His sister would have been in serious danger had we not been there to protect her.

 

His mother and sister, my wife and I were the only people in the room. The situation was calm and loving with attention focused on the children.

 

I think a temper tantrum is typically characterized as a rejection behavior. That is, the child refuses to interact, pulls away from you when you try to calm or comfort. This was opposite, he was trying, as hard as he could, in any way he could, to hurt any and all of us. He continued until he was too tired to continue.

 

I am 70, my wife is 46, mother of two, I parented them from infant/toddler stage, neither of us had ever seen anything like this.

 

He is usually very glad to see me in particular, He comes running, arms up and is content to sit quietly in my lap. Both children and just gotten up from naps so he had just had a bottle and was not hungry. They were in a room with toys, no strangers, plenty of attention available. No sibling quarreling. This event seemed to erupt out of nothing and lasted much longer than the previous tantrum.

 

Please, we know tantrums, this was much more. I checked with his day care and they had not seen this from him or other children. My wife aggrees that "Berserker" is an appropriate term to characterize the behaviour. Please think beyond tantrum.

 

Thank you,

 

Fred

Was this the first and only time you have seen this? How has his behavior been since then? Was there anything out of the ordinary that happened recently, for example, did he have any vaccines in close proximity to the event, change with any type of food, etc. ?
Ask Your Own Parenting Question
Customer reply replied 6 years ago
We have seen tantrums, perhaps 2 or 3, but never this before. No meds or vacines recently, no illnesses, except diaper rash. Frankly, his parents do not do a very good job, they are too young to be parents. ( My wife and I pay to have them in a very good day care so they get good care at least part of the day.) There are some disruptions between his parents but this is repeated and on-going, nothing new. I had visited with the boy, twice last week at the day care. He always complains when I leave. Finally, after the original tantrum he seemed to be quite normal for 10-15 minutes until this episode started. After it was over he seemed normal again. His mother reports no further episodes since then.
This definitely needs to be kept up on. I am wondering if the "disruptions" between his parents may be beginning to effect him. Even at this young of an age, tension and bad energy can be felt by children and let go at inappropriate times. There are some medical reasons for this type of behavior which is why I said to watch for continued episodes. How are his other motor skills and other learning developments? Violence CAN be an early sign of autism. Not to alarm you, just making you aware that this is one symptom of that in children where it regularly occurs. You seem to be a wonderful grandparent and both children are lucky to have you in their lives to make up for what their parents may be lacking in experience. His parents need to realize how subtle things can effect children at this age, even when it seems like he is too young. it seems as if you are doing everything you can for him and I wish I could be more of a help, but so far it has only happened one time and even though it was a vague statement of, "his parents not doing a very good job", that may very well be the cause..
Dr. Paige
Dr. Paige, Psychologist
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 1,427
Experience: Psychologist; Parent
Verified
Dr. Paige and 87 other Parenting Specialists are ready to help you
Ask your own question now
Was this answer helpful?

How JustAnswer works

step-image
Describe your issueThe assistant will guide you
step-image
Chat 1:1 with a parenting counselorLicensed Experts are available 24/7
step-image
100% satisfaction guaranteeGet all the answers you need
Ask Dr. Paige Your Own Question
Dr. Paige
Dr. Paige
Dr. Paige, Psychologist
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 1,427
1,427 Satisfied Customers
Experience: Psychologist; Parent

Dr. Paige is online now

A new question is answered every 9 seconds

How JustAnswer works:

  • Ask an ExpertExperts are full of valuable knowledge and are ready to help with any question. Credentials confirmed by a Fortune 500 verification firm.
  • Get a Professional AnswerVia email, text message, or notification as you wait on our site. Ask follow up questions if you need to.
  • 100% Satisfaction GuaranteeRate the answer you receive.

JustAnswer in the News:

Ask-a-doc Web sites: If you've got a quick question, you can try to get an answer from sites that say they have various specialists on hand to give quick answers... Justanswer.com.
JustAnswer.com...has seen a spike since October in legal questions from readers about layoffs, unemployment and severance.
Web sites like justanswer.com/legal
...leave nothing to chance.
Traffic on JustAnswer rose 14 percent...and had nearly 400,000 page views in 30 days...inquiries related to stress, high blood pressure, drinking and heart pain jumped 33 percent.
Tory Johnson, GMA Workplace Contributor, discusses work-from-home jobs, such as JustAnswer in which verified Experts answer people’s questions.
I will tell you that...the things you have to go through to be an Expert are quite rigorous.

What Customers are Saying:

Wonderful service, prompt, efficient, and accurate. Couldn't have asked for more. I cannot thank you enough for your help.

Mary C.Freshfield, Liverpool, UK

This expert is wonderful. They truly know what they are talking about, and they actually care about you. They really helped put my nerves at ease. Thank you so much!!!!

AlexLos Angeles, CA

Thank you for all your help. It is nice to know that this service is here for people like myself, who need answers fast and are not sure who to consult.

GPHesperia, CA

I couldn't be more satisfied! This is the site I will always come to when I need a second opinion.

JustinKernersville, NC

Just let me say that this encounter has been entirely professional and most helpful. I liked that I could ask additional questions and get answered in a very short turn around.

EstherWoodstock, NY

Thank you so much for taking your time and knowledge to support my concerns. Not only did you answer my questions, you even took it a step further with replying with more pertinent information I needed to know.

RobinElkton, Maryland

He answered my question promptly and gave me accurate, detailed information. If all of your experts are half as good, you have a great thing going here.

DianeDallas, TX

< Previous | Next >

Meet the Experts:

Cher

Cher

Teacher

108 satisfied customers

Extensive Experience working with Children/Teens; M.A. Teacher/Tutor 40+ yrs.; Parent of 2

Jennifer

Jennifer

School Psychologist

77 satisfied customers

Collaborative parent consultation on everything from modifying behavior to child development.

professional_Alison

professional_Alison

Child Care

77 satisfied customers

Degree in early years,16 years experience in childcare

Dr. L

Dr. L

Psychologist

40 satisfied customers

Licensed as psychologist and marriage and family therapist

Dr. Shirley Schaye

Dr. Shirley Schaye

Doctor

38 satisfied customers

PhD-Psych; Certif. Psychoanalyst NPAP& NYFS; Memb.APsaA;IPA; Pub.Author; Teach/Supervise Therapy

Eveningstargazer

Eveningstargazer

Family Counselor

31 satisfied customers

Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT)

Alicia_MSW

Alicia_MSW

Family Counselor

21 satisfied customers

Licensed social worker and psychotherapist

< Previous | Next >

Related Parenting Questions
I was emotionally drained today because of what happened this
I was emotionally drained today because of what happened this afternoon. I was reading a book to my son at nap time when he suddenly start whining about something. I told him I am not going to continu… read more
TherapistJen
TherapistJen
Licensed Clinical Social Worker
Master\u0027s Degree
961 satisfied customers
James Windell I just came from a very exhausting and frustrating
James Windell I just came from a very exhausting and frustrating 1 hour tantrum by my son. I almost break down and cried! He just won't calm down. He would pause from crying everytime I ignore him; bu… read more
JAMES WINDELL
JAMES WINDELL
Child development parenting consultant
Masters Degree
6 satisfied customers
James Windell ! John's tantrum's lately were so tough!
James Windell Hi! John's tantrum's lately were so tough! He didn't want to stop crying by himself; and even though I tried to tell him to calm down after about 10 minutes, he still would not listen. I… read more
JAMES WINDELL
JAMES WINDELL
Child development parenting consultant
Masters Degree
6 satisfied customers
What does a parent do with a four year old who screams his
What does a parent do with a four year old who screams his little head off and spoils birthday parties of other children when he doesn't get to blow out the candles on the cake. After all the screamin… read more
Eveningstargazer
Eveningstargazer
Family Counselor
Master's Degree
31 satisfied customers
Hi! Im feeling really frusterated! I know we talked about my
Hi! Im feeling really frusterated! I know we talked about my 2 year old screaming and temper tantrums. I just dont know how to handle it in those situations, especially in public. The hardest part for… read more
NormanM
NormanM
Partner in private practice
Adv Dip Psychotherapy (with Distinc
89 satisfied customers
How can I discipline one child without punishing the other
How can I discipline one child without punishing the other (and myself)? I am a single mom of two boys, aged 10 and 14, and we tend to do a lot of things together and are very close. I work full time,… read more
NormanM
NormanM
Partner in private practice
Adv Dip Psychotherapy (with Distinc
89 satisfied customers
Hi there! My son just turned 2 March. 9. I normally only
Hi there! My son just turned 2 March. 9. I normally only work 3 days a week. I work in the mOrning and my husband works at night. So he is only with us. No babysitters. Theses past 2 weeks I had to wO… read more
TherapistJen
TherapistJen
Licensed Clinical Social Worker
Master\u0027s Degree
961 satisfied customers
I have a three year old and lately he screams bloody murder
I have a three year old and lately he screams bloody murder whenever it is bed time. My wife has to go into his room with him until he calms down which is a good 20 minutes. In the 20 minutes he is at… read more
Elliott, LPCC, NCC
Elliott, LPCC, NCC
Adjunct Professor
Master's Degree
1,014 satisfied customers
my boy has been screaming at home and in public places for
my boy has been screaming at home and in public places for 4 or 5 months now. sometimes, it is because he is hungry or bored. but most of the time, I think he screams whenever he does not get what he … read more
TherapistJen
TherapistJen
Licensed Clinical Social Worker
Master\u0027s Degree
961 satisfied customers
My 24 month old has been hitting and kicking kids at daycare
My 24 month old has been hitting and kicking kids at daycare lately. I've been working through that problem. But I'm realizing now that part of the problem is that he is incredibally stubborn. For exa… read more
Heidi LPC
Heidi LPC
Master\u0027s Degree
7 satisfied customers
Hi My toddler is turing 3 in May and I cannot seem to have
Hi My toddler is turing 3 in May and I cannot seem to have control over him. He would scream for no reason and has temper tantrums and can cry for half an hour throwing himself on the floor. Both my h… read more
camd2000
camd2000
Master\u0027s Degree
13 satisfied customers
My son will be 17 months at the beginning of next month and
My son will be 17 months at the beginning of next month and is a great kid. He has, however, started having full -blown crying tantrums whenever he is not allowed to do what he wants. I completely und… read more
TherapistJen
TherapistJen
Licensed Clinical Social Worker
Master\u0027s Degree
961 satisfied customers
My grandson is very attached to my son, who is his main caregiver.
My grandson is very attached to my son, who is his main caregiver. I see my grandson 1-2 times a week and every time when he see's me, he will flop himself on the floor & have a crying tantrum until h… read more
proexpert37
proexpert37
Educator
Master\u0027s Degree
691 satisfied customers
My 1 year old grandson is a constant screamer whether he is
My 1 year old grandson is a constant screamer whether he is upset or just being vocal. His screaming is piercing and my daughter is exhausted from it. He eats relatively well but loses interest easily… read more
proexpert37
proexpert37
Educator
Master\u0027s Degree
691 satisfied customers
Background...My little boy is 3, 4 in April. He has been with
Background...My little boy is 3, 4 in April. He has been with me for 2 years, his adoption will be completed in next couple months. He is developmentally delayed primarily in speech and communication … read more
proexpert37
proexpert37
Educator
Master\u0027s Degree
691 satisfied customers
I have a 2 1/2 year old son who is extremely independent and strong-willed. Overall he li
I have a 2 1/2 year old son who is extremely independent and strong-willed. Overall he listens fairly well without much need for discipline, and time-outs have become far less frequent (once every sev… read more
Kelley
Kelley
Licensed Mental Health Practitioner
Master's Degree
1,017 satisfied customers
I am a grandmother of a 2 year old who hits his head against
I am a grandmother of a 2 year old who hits his head against the table or wall or screams(earth shattering sounds) for several minutes when he doesn,t get his own way.I want to stop my daughter and so… read more
proexpert37
proexpert37
Educator
Master\u0027s Degree
691 satisfied customers
my 4 year old is/ has been throwing dramatic temper tantrums
my 4 year old is/ has been throwing dramatic temper tantrums on a daily basis for several months now when he doesn't get what he wants. Please advise/ help!! I don't know what to do at this point.… read more
Dr.G.
Dr.G.
Counseling Psychologist
Doctoral Degree
449 satisfied customers
Disclaimer: Information in questions, answers, and other posts on this site ("Posts") comes from individual users, not JustAnswer; JustAnswer is not responsible for Posts. Posts are for general information, are not intended to substitute for informed professional advice (medical, legal, veterinary, financial, etc.), or to establish a professional-client relationship. The site and services are provided "as is" with no warranty or representations by JustAnswer regarding the qualifications of Experts. To see what credentials have been verified by a third-party service, please click on the "Verified" symbol in some Experts' profiles. JustAnswer is not intended or designed for EMERGENCY questions which should be directed immediately by telephone or in-person to qualified professionals.

Disclaimer: Information in questions, answers, and other posts on this site ("Posts") comes from individual users, not JustAnswer; JustAnswer is not responsible for Posts. Posts are for general information, are not intended to substitute for informed professional advice (medical, legal, veterinary, financial, etc.), or to establish a professional-client relationship. The site and services are provided "as is" with no warranty or representations by JustAnswer regarding the qualifications of Experts. To see what credentials have been verified by a third-party service, please click on the "Verified" symbol in some Experts' profiles. JustAnswer is not intended or designed for EMERGENCY questions which should be directed immediately by telephone or in-person to qualified professionals.

Show MoreShow Less

Ask Your Question

x