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Bonnie, Psychologist
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 2189
Experience:  and pediatric nurse practitioner with 30 years of experience counseling parents.
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Our 7 year old son seems happy at home and when you ask him

Resolved Question:

Our 7 year old son seems happy at home and when you ask him how things went at school he always answers great but lately he's been getting into trouble at school. He's had detention for hitting, pushing and spitting. He tells us peers are pressuring him to do it. We've talked to him and he knows what he does is wrong but does it anyways. We've tried loss of priveledges, loss of favourite toys but this always seems to reappear. He has a great imagination and had trouble staying on task in grade 1. We are very concerned. Ron and Tammy
Submitted: 6 years ago.
Category: Parenting
Expert:  Bonnie replied 6 years ago.
Hello and thank you for consulting JA,
He may be having trouble adjusting to the expectations of 1st grade (as compared to Kindergarten). Have a conference with his teacher. See if he seems to be struggling with the academics?....peer relationships?...focusing and attention? If any of these seems out of the ordinary to the teacher, have him evaluated by a child psychologist for learning disability or ADHD. But, it is probably just the adjustment. If the school is giving a consequence for the behavior, you do not need to "double it" at home. Talk to him about your disappointment and that is enough.

Hope this helps...
Customer: replied 6 years ago.
His 1st grade teacher told us that when asked he gave the right answer and proved he knew his stuff but he wouldn't do the work that needed to be done or wouldn't stay focused to get the work done. He did have some issues getting along with peers then. I find that when something is bothering him thats when it seems this starts. I am trying to find what works to get him to tell me what is really bothering him
Expert:  Bonnie replied 6 years ago.
Hello again,

Yes, that is interesting and is probably the key to the behavior. It is tricky to get them to talk at this age. In therapy we often use drawings. You can even say, draw me a picture about the best thing that happened in school today (a positive question first). Then draw me a picture about something that made you ...(mad, sad, scared). You can also find a book to read about peer relationships.

These are things to try at home before seeking outside help.
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