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Ask Dr. Rossi Your Own Question
Dr. Rossi
Dr. Rossi, Licensed Psychotherapist
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 4627
Experience:  Certified Hypnotherapist, Parenting Book Author, 13+ years of experience.
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Hi, I have a 5 yr old daughter. I am a single parent, run my

Customer Question

Hi, I have a 5 yr old daughter. I am a single parent, run my own business but do get alot of help from family with child care. I am feeling like the time I spend with my daughter is always spent with us falling out. My daughter is a very good child, well behaved and well mannered. I don't believe that the problem lies with her I feel it is me. I have absolutley no patience and feel I am very controlling. If she doesn't do what I ask and straight away I just have no time and soon find myself shouting at her. I keep telling myself I am the adult and I need to treat her like a 5 yr old and have more patience. Even my parents say I treat her to old for her age. We have just had a massive fall out at the dinner table and I've broke down in tears because yet again I feel another evening has been spoilt.
Submitted: 5 years ago.
Category: Parenting
Expert:  Dr. Rossi replied 5 years ago.



You're not a failure because you're actually accepting the fact that you're not patient with her and it seems that you want to change that. Your daughter is at an age where she's very flexible as she's still learning and developing her sense of self through her interaction with you and others.


You can change your behavior and you may want to let go of the guilt first. You are in control of your own reactions. There will always be times where your daughter tests you or acts in a way you don't like. That is normal whether she's 5 or 15 or 25....


How you go about changing your behavior is totally up to you. It is a process and you're doing this for the two of you; no one is sitting by grading or judging you. You may observe your daughter and how she responds to different directives given both by you and other adults discipling her, you may work with a professional to learn how to better deal with your own reactions and then develop healthier parenting skills.


A democratic parenting style usually works better than an authoritarian one.


Parenting Young Children: Systematic Training for Effective Parenting (STEP) of Children Under Six paperback


My Kid Is Acting Out and I'm About to Shout: Effective Parenting Made Easy audio


Customer: replied 5 years ago.
Relist: Answer quality.
I feel I explained I know it's my fault and this is what I want to change. I feel my parents are watching me and I already see how she reacts differently to them disciplining her thats why I kow what i'm doing isn't right.