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proexpert37, Educator/Life Coach
Category: Parenting
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Experience:  Teacher 20+ years, Parent, Expert Mentor
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I have been divorced 21 years. My daughters are now 30 and

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I have been divorced 21 years. My daughters are now 30 and 33. I was the main custodial parent. It was a very hard divorce. Husband was a philanderer. Initially he wanted a separation. I decided on divorce. Husband moved to another state. My girls were in 2nd and 5th grade at time of divorce. Husband (i thought) was trying to be more of a father in kid's lives......teenage years was tumultuous. I didn't date while my girls were growing up. I wasn't a drug user or alcoholic abuser.....I tried to be a good example.
During the divorce my ex was trying to prove that I was an abusing parent. Not so. He tried to keep the heat off him being a philanderer by saying I was an abusing parent. My oldest daughter hasn't contacted me in 8 years. My younger daughter (seems more interested in family)....has some wild abusive ideas regarding me that just did not happen....talking with other divorced people....they made me realize I was a victim of parental alienation. I was wondering....would it be appropriate to send my adult daughters a copy of the book, "Breaking the ties that Bind" by Amy J.L. Baker?.....Or, would I be adding fuel to the huge fire?
Submitted: 6 years ago.
Category: Parenting
Expert:  proexpert37 replied 6 years ago.
Hello and Thank You for using Just Answer. I am sorry to hear about the problems that you are having with your daughters when it sounds like you have done absolutely nothing wrong as they have been manipulated by the ideas of others into thinking of you as someone who you are not. Sending a book would be an excellent idea. It may not be well received but at least you are putting forth the effort in trying to reconnect with your daughters. That is all you can do is keep letting your daughters know through letters, phone calls, texting, etc. that you will always be their mother and that you will always be there for them no matter what. You have nothing to lose in sending a book that might be helpful.
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