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proexpert37, Educator/Life Coach
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 1374
Experience:  Teacher 20+ years, Parent, Expert Mentor
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My 15-year-old daughter is completely out of control. She

Customer Question

My 15-year-old daughter is completely out of control. She does whatever she wants. She has run away numerous times. She very often cuts school, misses classes, does not complete assignments, and is extremely disrespectful to school personnel and me. I have gone to Parent Project to find ways to deal with her behavior. Nothing is helping and everything is getting worse. She lies to me about everything and does not understand the long term consequences of her behavior. I really need to know what I can do to help her get back on track.
Submitted: 6 years ago.
Category: Parenting
Expert:  proexpert37 replied 6 years ago.
Hello and Thank You for using Just Answer. I am sorry to hear about the problems that you are having with your daughter. Is she an only child? Has she always behaved in such a manner? Are both parents in the home? What are her friends like? Are you involved in church? Do you have any family support? Thanks!!!
Customer: replied 6 years ago.
She has one older brother and one older sister. She started behaving this way around seventh grade. She is now in ninth grade. Her father left about one and a half years ago. She has no "real friends" but the people she hangs out with at school and she says are her friends are a very bad influence on her. There has been church involvement in the past, but she no longer wants to particiapte in any of it and has had some bad situations occur with church activities as well as far as getting involved wtih the wrong type of people. There has been some family support but that also did not work out.
Expert:  proexpert37 replied 6 years ago.

Thank you for responding. It is not easy being the youngest child. Also, your daughter may have some deeply rooted emotional pain about her father leaving from a while ago. It sounds as though ever since she entered the teen age years, her life has gone astray. It is hard for you being a single parent with a disrespectful child. Have you ever thought of professional counseling? Your daughter could receive on going counseling and so could you. Unfortunately, her choice of "friends" is not helping the situation. At an extreme level if you can afford it, you can always send her away to a boarding school or a boot camp type school.


Hope this provides a little insight. If you need more assistance, just ask!!! Have a great day!!!Laughing

Customer: replied 6 years ago.
She has aleady been in counseling as well and that was not helpful. I cannot afford to send her anywhere nor do we any longer have medical insurance so that I can obtain any other counseling for her.
Expert:  proexpert37 replied 6 years ago.
Unfortunately, the burden falls on you. You MUST step up to the plate even though you may feel like the bad guy here. With regards to school, you must sit down with your daughter, her counselors, and her teachers and possibly an administrator and discuss her school issues. Everybody must be on the same page. Your daughter needs to know that school personnel supports her positive efforts and will back her up when she does well. At home, limit all of her fun activities until she starts to show a change. She needs to feel as though she is in jail. No phone time. No texting. No computer time. She must earn her privileges back and you need to tell her that as well. She may rant and rave and may even curse at you but STAY IN CONTROL. Do you think she would behave better if she went to love with her father? If that option is available, you may want to pursue it. She may respond differently to her dad than with you. Oh..also, there are psychologists available at school that you can request your daughter to see. That might do her a world of good.