Parenting

Have Parenting Questions? Ask a Parenting Counselor for Answers

Ask an Expert,
Get an Answer ASAP!

Parenting

I asked my 16yo daughter a question this morning and she lied.

Customer Question
She then covered the lie...
I asked my 16yo daughter a question this morning and she lied. She then covered the lie over and over trying to convince me that I was acting like NCIS!! Finally when I said that I could just take the cup and have it tested to see if there were signs of her meds in there she said she did not take them. I did stay calm but it was very unnerving to be lied to dead in your face when I knew in my heart she did not take them. What is a good consequence and how do I handle our next conversation about it?
Submitted: 6 years ago.Category: Parenting
Show More
Show Less
Ask Your Own Parenting Question
Answered in 4 minutes by:
3/12/2011
Parenting Counselor: Dr. Rossi, Licensed Psychotherapist replied 6 years ago
Dr. Rossi
Dr. Rossi, Licensed Psychotherapist
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 4,627
Experience: Certified Hypnotherapist, Parenting Book Author, 13+ years of experience.
Verified

Hi,

 

would you please clarify what medication is she on and if she is receiving therapy?

Ask Your Own Parenting Question
Customer reply replied 6 years ago
SHe has type 1 diabetes and Hashimotos disease. She was dx at age 8.She recently was found to have a high gluten allergy and dairy allergy so she has been on a gluten free dairy free diet for 2 months and it was juiced greens that she did not drink which is part of her regimen. She calls it medicine. It does not bother me that she did not drink them and all she needed to say was I did not drink them this morning. That has happened before and I never feel I over react. But to continue the charade of saying yes I did drink them and keep it going as long as she did concerns me.
Parenting Counselor: Dr. Rossi, Licensed Psychotherapist replied 6 years ago

Thank you for clarifying. Her behavior is driven by something that servers her (even if it is unhealthy or "wrong") Some speculations- 1/ she may be trying to avoid these diagnoses and not think about them or that they in a way control her life, hence telling you what you want to hear 2/ she does not want you to worry and wants to please you 3/ she is struggling with this regimen (maybe she feels odd or compares herself to others= self esteem issues) 3/ she could have felt in control of her own life at age 16 and thinking what she does is best for her (in a way trying to take control of her health and life the best she knows how to)

 

It may help to find out from her how she perceives your expectations and if she has issues with them where do they stem from. do these have to do with her frustration regarding her diagnoses, does she feel you're trying to correct this for her or to control her, does she feel stifled, etc. Talking to her and finding out her perspective and what fuels it may be step one for you. Then, you would want to re-educate her as to the reason why you're asking her to do this. Third, you can let her know that you cannot watch her 24/7 and would like to have some trust in her that she will do what is best for her health regardless of whether she agrees about this during this time of her life.

 

You may let her know that the only consequence is her health on the line and your level of trust that the two of you share. The conversation can focus on empowering her (what you know she's capable of , what is good/healthy for her and in strengthening your mother-daughter bond and trust level) Punishing her for this now would be counter productive and you know she can do and tell you what she wishes. Try to find out what is causing this resistance in her. Does it have to do with taste, routines, reminding her of her issues, etc. and take it from there.

 

Dr. Rossi
Dr. Rossi, Licensed Psychotherapist
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 4,627
Experience: Certified Hypnotherapist, Parenting Book Author, 13+ years of experience.
Verified
Dr. Rossi and 87 other Parenting Specialists are ready to help you
Ask your own question now
Ask Dr. Rossi Your Own Question
Dr. Rossi
Dr. Rossi
Dr. Rossi, Licensed Psychotherapist
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 4,627
4,627 Satisfied Customers
Experience: Certified Hypnotherapist, Parenting Book Author, 13+ years of experience.

Dr. Rossi is online now

A new question is answered every 9 seconds

How JustAnswer works:

  • Ask an ExpertExperts are full of valuable knowledge and are ready to help with any question. Credentials confirmed by a Fortune 500 verification firm.
  • Get a Professional AnswerVia email, text message, or notification as you wait on our site. Ask follow up questions if you need to.
  • 100% Satisfaction GuaranteeRate the answer you receive.

JustAnswer in the News:

Ask-a-doc Web sites: If you've got a quick question, you can try to get an answer from sites that say they have various specialists on hand to give quick answers... Justanswer.com.
JustAnswer.com...has seen a spike since October in legal questions from readers about layoffs, unemployment and severance.
Web sites like justanswer.com/legal
...leave nothing to chance.
Traffic on JustAnswer rose 14 percent...and had nearly 400,000 page views in 30 days...inquiries related to stress, high blood pressure, drinking and heart pain jumped 33 percent.
Tory Johnson, GMA Workplace Contributor, discusses work-from-home jobs, such as JustAnswer in which verified Experts answer people’s questions.
I will tell you that...the things you have to go through to be an Expert are quite rigorous.

What Customers are Saying:

Wonderful service, prompt, efficient, and accurate. Couldn't have asked for more. I cannot thank you enough for your help.

Mary C.Freshfield, Liverpool, UK

This expert is wonderful. They truly know what they are talking about, and they actually care about you. They really helped put my nerves at ease. Thank you so much!!!!

AlexLos Angeles, CA

Thank you for all your help. It is nice to know that this service is here for people like myself, who need answers fast and are not sure who to consult.

GPHesperia, CA

I couldn't be more satisfied! This is the site I will always come to when I need a second opinion.

JustinKernersville, NC

Just let me say that this encounter has been entirely professional and most helpful. I liked that I could ask additional questions and get answered in a very short turn around.

EstherWoodstock, NY

Thank you so much for taking your time and knowledge to support my concerns. Not only did you answer my questions, you even took it a step further with replying with more pertinent information I needed to know.

RobinElkton, Maryland

He answered my question promptly and gave me accurate, detailed information. If all of your experts are half as good, you have a great thing going here.

DianeDallas, TX

< Previous | Next >

Meet the Experts:

Cher

Cher

Teacher

93 satisfied customers

Extensive Experience working with Children/Teens; M.A. Teacher/Tutor 40+ yrs.; Parent of 2

Jennifer

Jennifer

School Psychologist

77 satisfied customers

Collaborative parent consultation on everything from modifying behavior to child development.

professional_Alison

professional_Alison

Child Care

77 satisfied customers

Degree in early years,16 years experience in childcare

Dr. L

Dr. L

Psychologist

40 satisfied customers

Licensed as psychologist and marriage and family therapist

Dr. Shirley Schaye

Dr. Shirley Schaye

Doctor

38 satisfied customers

PhD-Psych; Certif. Psychoanalyst NPAP& NYFS; Memb.APsaA;IPA; Pub.Author; Teach/Supervise Therapy

Eveningstargazer

Eveningstargazer

Family Counselor

31 satisfied customers

Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT)

Alicia_MSW

Alicia_MSW

Family Counselor

21 satisfied customers

Licensed social worker and psychotherapist

< Previous | Next >

Related Parenting Questions
My husband and I have been looking for a home for 7 years
My husband and I have been looking for a home for 7 years and due to several of my restrictions and safety concerns have not been able to find one until now. My 8 year old daughter is on board and wou… read more
Jennifer
Jennifer
School Psychologist
Master's Degree
77 satisfied customers
I am very concerned about my 11 year old daughter. She has
Dear Sir/Madam, I am very concerned about my 11 year old daughter. She has been away from me for about 2 years, and finally now I am seeing her every weekend. She has always been a girl who loved pink… read more
Jennifer
Jennifer
School Psychologist
Master's Degree
77 satisfied customers
I am currently married with 2 children: a 5 year old girl
I am currently married with 2 children: a 5 year old girl who will be 6 y/o on March, 2018 and my son who will be 3 years old this month (nov, 2017).Their personalities are very different and I'm very… read more
JohnMichaels,MS,LPC
JohnMichaels,MS,LPC
Counselor
Master\u0027s Degree
166 satisfied customers
What is my best defense against a group of people that are
what is my best defense against a group of people that are contributing to the delinquency of a minor?… read more
Jennifer
Jennifer
School Psychologist
Master's Degree
77 satisfied customers
My 2 yrs old just started climbing out her bed 3 nights ago.
Hi, My 2 yrs old just started climbing out her bed 3 nights ago. We switched her bed to toddler bed last night with side railing but then she refused to sleep in it. We had to put back her crib side b… read more
JohnMichaels,MS,LPC
JohnMichaels,MS,LPC
Counselor
Master\u0027s Degree
166 satisfied customers
My 8 years old daughters complains about everyrhing.
My 8 years old daughters complains about everyrhing. Sometimes when she tells me that she is feeling sick I don´t believe her because I don´t think it´s true. Latetly she has complain about pain in he… read more
Jennifer
Jennifer
School Psychologist
Master's Degree
77 satisfied customers
How can a 23 year old female work through / get over built
How can a 23 year old female work through / get over built up anger / resentment / feelings of loss over having grown up in a divorced home with need for both parents, not just one? This high-function… read more
Dr.G.
Dr.G.
Counseling Psychologist
Doctoral Degree
446 satisfied customers
My daughter is 14 years old, my husband and I are very
My daughter is 14 years old, my husband and I are very protective, she feels we do not trust her, which is not the case, but we just don't trust the boys out there. We live in a good neighborhood, whi… read more
Dr.G.
Dr.G.
Counseling Psychologist
Doctoral Degree
446 satisfied customers
I'm having problems w my 19yo stepson, he doesnt respect me.
I'm having problems w my 19yo stepson, he doesnt respect me. He's been living wiih us frm the age of 8yo. anything I say bothers him he is lazy, doesnt do anything in the hse just free loader, no coll… read more
Marie
Marie
506 satisfied customers
I am driving myself bonkers! My daughter 15 1/2 only child.
Hi ! I am driving myself bonkers! My daughter 15 1/2 only child. I am so terrified when shes not with me or in her room safe and sound! When she leaves for school, i pray for her safe trip, good day, … read more
Therapist Leslie
Therapist Leslie
Masters, Professional Psychology
5 satisfied customers
I am having major problems with my 15 year old daughter. how
Hi, I am having major problems with my 15 year old daughter. how do you help. … read more
JohnMichaels,MS,LPC
JohnMichaels,MS,LPC
Counselor
Master\u0027s Degree
166 satisfied customers
My daughter is 5 years old and doesn't finish her school
My daughter is 5 years old and doesn't finish her school work from talking so much. She is spoiled, and doesn't listen to anybody anymore. How do we get her to listen to authority without spanking her… read more
Jennifer
Jennifer
School Psychologist
Master's Degree
77 satisfied customers
My 9 year old son has these episodes where he crys loudly
My 9 year old son has these episodes where he crys loudly over small things like taking a shower. He's great at school and in sports but just has a bad attitude at home when he's asked to do something… read more
CounselorJules
CounselorJules
Licensed Professional Counselor
Master\u0027s Degree
54 satisfied customers
What should i do with an incorrigible teen? He dislikes mom,
what should i do with an incorrigible teen? He dislikes mom, won't go along with the rules, keeps running away using interesting methods of escape, wants his own job and apartment, thinks he's grown u… read more
Jennifer
Jennifer
School Psychologist
Master's Degree
77 satisfied customers
This is a hard topic to discuss and I feel like a broken
Second opinion] This is a hard topic to discuss and I feel like a broken record asking this and that about what to do about my and our kids situation.To summarize, my spouse and I had an argument whil… read more
CounselorJules
CounselorJules
Licensed Professional Counselor
Master\u0027s Degree
54 satisfied customers
My seven-year-old son has dyslexia and he is in second
My seven-year-old son has dyslexia and he is in second grade. He is reading but he reads slow. We are seeing great progress. He also has a tutor helping him that specializes in this disorder.With this… read more
JohnMichaels,MS,LPC
JohnMichaels,MS,LPC
Counselor
Master\u0027s Degree
166 satisfied customers
This is a hard topic to discuss and I feel like a broken
This is a hard topic to discuss and I feel like a broken record asking this and that about what to do about my and our kids' situation.To summarize, my spouse and I had an argument while drinking, and… read more
JohnMichaels,MS,LPC
JohnMichaels,MS,LPC
Counselor
Master\u0027s Degree
166 satisfied customers
We have a boy who is turning 3 and he refuses to use the
Hello. We have a boy who is turning 3 and he refuses to use the potty to poop. He has no problem making pee. He is a very bright and self confident kid, who loves chocolate, and not even the big choco… read more
Dr SS
Dr SS
Doctoral Degree
12,327 satisfied customers
Disclaimer: Information in questions, answers, and other posts on this site ("Posts") comes from individual users, not JustAnswer; JustAnswer is not responsible for Posts. Posts are for general information, are not intended to substitute for informed professional advice (medical, legal, veterinary, financial, etc.), or to establish a professional-client relationship. The site and services are provided "as is" with no warranty or representations by JustAnswer regarding the qualifications of Experts. To see what credentials have been verified by a third-party service, please click on the "Verified" symbol in some Experts' profiles. JustAnswer is not intended or designed for EMERGENCY questions which should be directed immediately by telephone or in-person to qualified professionals.

Disclaimer: Information in questions, answers, and other posts on this site ("Posts") comes from individual users, not JustAnswer; JustAnswer is not responsible for Posts. Posts are for general information, are not intended to substitute for informed professional advice (medical, legal, veterinary, financial, etc.), or to establish a professional-client relationship. The site and services are provided "as is" with no warranty or representations by JustAnswer regarding the qualifications of Experts. To see what credentials have been verified by a third-party service, please click on the "Verified" symbol in some Experts' profiles. JustAnswer is not intended or designed for EMERGENCY questions which should be directed immediately by telephone or in-person to qualified professionals.

Show MoreShow Less

Ask Your Question

x