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proexpert37, Educator/Life Coach
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 1374
Experience:  Teacher 20+ years, Parent, Expert Mentor
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I am finding it increasingly difficult being a single parent.

Customer Question

I am finding it increasingly difficult being a single parent. Two children with autistic tenadancies and no proper guidance. An 18year old who tries to help but i know its not fair on her. I just get by on a day to day basis with arguments, fighting, tantrums etc..I work full time and am very tired, their father (my ex) who had an affair now living with his girlfrriend who says she cant cope with the boys all the time hence they cant sleep over is useless, and is very sexist tells me i do nothing because i got to work so im not really looking after his two children.... I have my own ill health and get limited breaks from caring. 2 hours wed and fri then 6 hours sunday. sleep overs once every six wks if that!!!, its only if he has not scheduled one of his gigs.... Im so fed up...and tired. No extended family that live near by so myself and children are very isolated. guess thats why they have sociial and emotional difficulties.....its so much now i dont want to do it anymore....we have been involved with psychologists, but dont feel like we have been given any guidance and support at all.  The kids dont like going and dont want to get involved, so dont say much when we have gone... i feel like i am the only one who understands whats going on but no ones listening because they dont know what to do...i am so isolated and lonely.  i love my kids, but feel i have nothing to give them...
Submitted: 6 years ago.
Category: Parenting
Expert:  proexpert37 replied 6 years ago.
Hello my friend. How old are your children with autism. Does your husband provide enough child support to cover the needs of your children?
Customer: replied 6 years ago.

Hi there, the children have not been officially diagnosed with Autism. They have been described as having "social and emotional difficulties" with traits of austistic tendencies. No official diagnosis given hence very little help, support or guidance. I have been given £100 per child since splitting with their father. We were never married. They are 12 now (twin boys). We separated in 2006.


Hope this helps...



Expert:  proexpert37 replied 6 years ago.
I have been swamped and in and out of the office. I will have more time this weekend to answer your question as I will be away from my computer for the rest of the day.
Expert:  proexpert37 replied 6 years ago.

You should seek further evaluation from a psychlogist or even your children's pediatrician regarding your twin boys. You have so much to offer your children. You are a very loving mother who cares deeply about their personal well being. If they are displaying many autistic tendencies, they may be autistic. Why haven't they been diagnosed as such? There are a wealth of resources available for parents with special needs children. You must take the first step and get out there and fight for the needs of your children no matter what their needs may be. Be proactive. Your children have the right to receive any type of help that they need for their emotional and social problems. Try another psychologist. Get a different opinion. Join a parent support group for children with emotional and social problems and another group for single parents. You need support since you do not have family support. You can not do this alone and that is what you have been doing and that is why you are so hard on yourself. There is a light at the end of this tunnel. Ask if you need more advice. Have a great day!!!