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proexpert37, Educator/Life Coach
Category: Parenting
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Experience:  Teacher 20+ years, Parent, Expert Mentor
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Please help! I am a stay at home mom to a 5 yr old boy. I

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Please help! I am a stay at home mom to a 5 yr old boy. I am at a loss of what to do for his disrespectful talking to me. He says things along the line of I don't love you, don't want to see you ever again, I never miss you, I hate you, I never am going to talk to you again, I wish I lived somewhere else so I wouldn't have to see you again. etc. This usual comes after he doesn't get what he wants or has been punished. But sometimes it is out of the blue. He is not this way with anyone else. When he does this I have out him in time-outs, taken toys away or have him go in his room until he is ready to talk nicely to me. This has been going on now for over a month. Not sure what to do, is this normal for this age? He reminds me of a disrespectful teenager. When my husband is home he wants nothing to do with me. It is starting to hurt my feelings and now I wonder if I am doing something wrong?
Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
Thank you
Fustrated mom
I have a few questions for you...Does your son attend school and how is his behavior at school? What is the relationship like between you and your husband? How does your husband treat your son?
Customer: replied 6 years ago.
Hi, my son is in school mon-fri. 9-1 pm and his teacher says he is a joy and he loves her. He looks forward to going everyday and is friends with everyone in class. His teacher and the other teachers say he is very polite and well mannered. My husband and I have a very good relationship and are on the same page parenting wise. He is very close with his father and my husband is a very involved in his care. He does not do this while my husband is around. Not sure if this is needed but he does have a sister who is very much a mommy's girl and is 18months younger than him. I would say the two of them are close but do have their sibling rivalry
Thank you

Your son needs to be taught how to respect you. Your husband must also assist in this matter in teaching your son more about respect. You can do this through role playing. Your son may also be jealous of the relationship between you and your daughter because he is no longer the only child. He cannot tell you this because he cannot express these types of feelings at his age.

Customer: replied 6 years ago.
How do you teach respect to me? He is in karate and has learned yes mam yes sir and uses that with me. I have taught him to be respectful to others and have heard from others he is very respectful to everyone but me?? Continue with overtime time out punishment when he is disrespectful? Will work on the possiblility of the jealousy with sibling. Thanks
When he is disrespecting you, tell him what you disapprove of and the more appropriate words that he needs to say and have him repeat those words to you. Tell him that you will reward him when he exhibits positive behavior and uses more respectful words. You are trying to reduce the negative behavior and replace it with positive choices. You do not want to give him too many rewards though. The rewards can be used more frequent at first and then decreased as more positive behavior is displayed. The rewards can be as simple as verbal praise and stickers or more elaborate like a trip to the park.
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