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proexpert37, Educator/Life Coach
Category: Parenting
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Experience:  Teacher 20+ years, Parent, Expert Mentor
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i have a son michael who is 35 - he lives with his aunt and

Customer Question

i have a son michael who is 35 - he lives with his aunt and his brother joel has given him work - he is on speed and marijuana and does not admit that he has a problem although he cannot pay his way anywhere and is always in debt - my other son whom he works for pays him over $1000 a week and he always lets Joel down - not turning up for work ect. now michaels behaviour has escalated to him becoming very angry and irrational . i live in another state and in the past have spoken to michael about his drug taking but it always ends badly with michael not talking to me . i dont know what to do as a mother should i talk to him again or let him live his own life now that he is 35- i cannot think of anything but him day and night
Submitted: 6 years ago.
Category: Parenting
Expert:  proexpert37 replied 6 years ago.

It is normal and only natural for any mother to be concerned about her son no matter how old he may be. However, he is an adult and must take responsibility for his actions and be held accountable. You simply need to provide as much encouraging and supportive words especially when he is at his low points. There is not much more that you can do. You can not change another person. Just keep in contact with his aunt and inquire about your son's overall well being. When your son is in the mood to communicate, you can tell him how you feel about certain things regarding his life. However, your son seems very fragile and your words must be non threatening.


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