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proexpert37, Educator/Life Coach
Category: Parenting
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Experience:  Teacher 20+ years, Parent, Expert Mentor
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There is a Mother who I to have to be around for work reasons,

Customer Question

There is a Mother who I to have to be around for work reasons, plus she lives across the hall from me... Her two year old is a terrorist. She refuses to discipline him. She will thearten to leave or deny him candy or put him in time out, but none of this works. I have a 6 month old baby who cannot be vaccinated... He has deadly reactions. Her son is constantly sick. My son can't get vacinated until he is 2 years old. I have explained to her the importance of telling me when her son is ill so that I can keep my boy away. Twice she has taken her son around my son, knowing he was sick and said nothing, and twice my son has eneded up in the ER with a 100 degree fever. She will often ring my doorbell to borrow things. Everytime her 2 year old bolts into my house and starts destroying anything he can get his hands on. To get him to stop she will give him my 6 month old's toys. Doesn't ask me if this is okay or return the toys or anything else that she borrows. Now my baby and I both are sick with her kids newest germ. Its taking every ounce of me not to go across the hall and scream at her. My husband has asked me to keep her kid away. Please help!
Submitted: 6 years ago.
Category: Parenting
Expert:  proexpert37 replied 6 years ago.

Your neighbor friend needs some advice and should be writing to Just Answer instead of you. But since you have taken the liberty to try and solve the issue, I applaud you. It seems natural that you would want to go and scream at your neighbor for her annoying actions and her misbehaving child. However, I do not think that would really solve the problem. It seems as though your neighbor is craving attention as well as her son, though they are placing your infant in harm's way when the "wild child" is ill. You need to be firm with this neighbor and set limits. Even though you have asked her in a nice way, it is now time to flip the script. You and your husband should approach her and authoritatively tell her what you would like from her as a neighbor and what you do not appreciate from her as a neighbor. Then ask her if she sees any problems with what has been happening. Maybe she has failed to realize the seriousness of these matters. I would also put in a complaint to the management department of your building and see if they can be of any assistance. Nonetheless, it still seems as though this neighbor has some deeply rooted issues that are being manifested by her inability to control her son. You could try another approach and suggest that she take some parenting classes before the behavior of her child gets worse though she may take offense to this suggestion. But any route you take now, your neighbor must realize that you have had enough!!!!


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Edited by Erica.13 on 11/2/2010 at 5:50 AM EST