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Bonnie, Psychologist
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 2189
Experience:  and pediatric nurse practitioner with 30 years of experience counseling parents.
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How to you stop a child from telling lies He is 4 years old

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How to you stop a child from telling lies? He is 4 years old and his parents are divorce and it seems to be more for attention but is causing them to go fight it out in court which is not good for anyone. HELP
The first step is to find out the meaning of the behavior. Why does he lie?

This is a website that has a great article on lying.

If you could take a look at it and give me more background information regarding what he lies about, I will respond more.

Go to Search Site and enter LYING

Edited by Bonnie on 9/11/2010 at 2:10 AM EST
Customer: replied 6 years ago.
He is 4 and his lies usually involve telling his Mother that his Nana (the father's Mom) has done something horrible to him. He loves his Nana always cuddling with her. One thing he said (his Mom is pregnant, which is the cause for the divorce) "Nana said you won't love me anymore when the new baby is born" This was not true and very upsetting. When he was confronted by his Nana he said "because you told me that". He also told his Mom he went to Church (this is against the parenting plan and could cause his Dad to be in trouble) He says he has two Daddies. Other things that upset the Mom, she is Bi-polar and believes every word the child says, she is also under the impression that the Nana is trying to turn the children against her, but she has not said why and this could not be further from the truth because that kind of behavior would only hurt the child.
Good article by the way.
Ok well I agree that it is attention getting. A way to get mother's attention because it obviously gets a big response from her. I am not sure what your relationship is to them but a trusted person should tell mom not to react in front of him and to check things out before she takes them as fact. Lots of tension in this situation and little boy may feel pressure to align himself with mom. When she says others are trying to turn him against her, she is "projecting" what she is doing (trying to turn him against others). It part of the dynamic of the illness. Poor boy, he is in a rough spot.
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