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My daughter has been caught drinking at school and received a 3 day suspension. She received a month grounding off in three weeks on good behaviour.
Our consequence is she loses all of her priviledges as well as being grounded to the house (no phone, friends, computer, video games). Her life as she knows it ends and becomes very bland.
She has to get caught though for this to happen. She has become very secretive and sneaky and has someone buying booze for her but refuses to state who. Her friends have parents that allow their kids to drink and have "supervised drinking parties". How does a parent contend with this? I find I am sneaking around trying to find out what she is up to all the time. I don't know what else to do. I call parents when she says she is sleeping out to confirm they will be there..argh..you get the point.
So I heard through the grapevine that there is a BYOB party tomorrow night. Involves tents, boys, girls and booze. She does not know that I know and has claimed that she is "hanging out with her girlfriend" tomorrow night. I was thinking I might call this "girlfriends mom" today to confirm the truth and get a feeling for her beliefs when it comes to her children drinking. What do you think about that? I have a contract I drew up when she kept getting into trouble. It is very precise and very strict. I am thinking I may have to pull out those stops. This way we have something to point back to when she misbehaves and she knows what to expect. It outlines expectations, rules, consequences and has a place for signatures. HMMM maybe I was on the right track with that after all.
She doesn't know that I know about the party and she has stated she is staying at a friends place. How would she earn this? She has chores to do for her phone. Those are done, should I give her more to do? hmmm...