Thank you for your inquiry.
Usually the best place to start in a situation like this, is to sit down with your daughter and let her know that we all have responsibilities. Give her specific examples of your responsibilities, and ask her to imagine what it would be like if you didn't do your responsibilities. Then let her know that she has responsibilities too, list some of the ones that she does okay (taking herself to the bathroom when she needs to go, brushing her hair, whatever things you see that she does take responsibility for) and also the things that you feel she is not taking responsibility for ( you don't need to distinguish between the two yet, just list them). Ask her what responsibilities she thinks she has been doing well at, and what she thinks she needs to work on. If you disagree, give her your feedback too.
Then, make a chart with some of the most important responsibilities she has, try to put some on that she is already succeeding at, but mostly it should be things she needs to work on. Each day at the end of the day (or when she finishes the responsibility if it is a one time activity) mark off or put a sticker next to each responsibility she did a good job of taking care of. If you want you can offer a reward for a certain number of stickers at the end of the week, or you could just use it as a list for her and let the fact that she can check them off be her reward.
As much as possible, encourage her to take the full responsibility for remembering to do them. You might put categories like:
- Take care of my belongings and put them away where they belong
- complete my homework (if she didn't bring her book home and can't complete it, then she can not mark this off, if bringing books is a real issue, you may want to seperate them out and have that listed as two seperate categories.
If you have any further questions about this or need more clarification, please feel free to ask. If my answer has helped, please remember to push the green accept button.