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Ms Chase
Ms Chase, #1 Just Answer Parenting Expert
Category: Parenting
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Experience:  Just Answer Parenting Mentor, Emotional, Behavioral & Physical Issues. Babies to Teens.
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me and my wife have a 4 year old together, my wife also has

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me and my wife have a 4 year old together, my wife also has older kids (17 - 24) wife feels it is ok for her older kids to have boyfriends and girlfriends sleep over in their bedrooms as she says the teenagers are going to have sex so they might as well have it here in our house, and the older ones she says they are old enough and can do what they want....the older ones have their own apartments and if they want to do whatever they want in their apartments that is fine with me, but i do not feel it is appropriate for them to sleep together in our household, especially with a 4 year old in the house. am i wrong in asking my wife to ask her older kids not to have boyfriend and girlfrind sleepovers?
Submitted: 8 years ago.
Category: Parenting
Expert:  Ms Chase replied 8 years ago.
NO, you are not wrong, but I must say that this is my opinion. Because it is her house too, it seems like you have come to a moral crossroads and you're going to have to work it out between the two of you. If you explain to her that your main thoughts are for the four year old and how she perceives things, then I would think she should understand.

In my opinion what you're asking is not wrong. Would she let them do drugs in the house since teens do drugs, so they might as well do it in the house? I understand that she's saying that the older kids have their own place, so there's no reason why they shouldn't have people over at their place and if they stay with you guys, they can do without sex for a few nights. As for the 17 yr old, you are sending them the wrong message as well. Not only are you saying that it's ok to have sex, but you're not creating parental boundaries...for any of the kids, not just the four year old. I welcome your thoughts, let me know if you want to talk more.

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