New Zealand Law
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If the children are in New Zealand, then it is the New Zealand family court which will need to make any parenting orders. I assume that is why you have asked from a New Zealand site of course. These things can be negotiated, although for practical reasons it would be a little difficult to share parenting because of the fact they are two different countries. This should not stop your son from having regular contact, and perhaps at a later stage the children could decide to live with him and have contact with the mother. The first steps are to negotiate an agreement, and if this is not possible, then the next step is a family mediation and the final step if the mediation does not work is to go to the family court. Most cases do settle however