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Chris The Lawyer
Chris The Lawyer, Lawyer
Category: New Zealand Law
Satisfied Customers: 23061
Experience:  38 years qualified as a lawyer; LLB, MMgt and FAMINZ.
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I would like some advice please. My ex partner and I separated

Customer Question

I would like some advice please. My ex partner and I separated 9 years ago when our daughter was just two. She is now 11. For the last six years we have had a parenting order stating that I have 9 nights fortnight and my ex has 5 nights consecutively per fortnight and a week of each of the school holidays and up to two weeks at xmas time. For most of this time the agreement has worked okay. I was a stay at home mother for the first 5 years of her life and I have been very involved in our daughters upbringing and attend all school related things and also had a job as a teacher aide at my daughters school for five years as I put her welfare first and worked the school hours. As my daughter is my only child my time with her is precious. My ex partner has another family and is very difficult to deal with. I am wanting to move to Whakatane, from Rotorua as I have been in a relationship with a wonderful man for the past two years and as he is self-employed it is better for my daughter and I to move than for him and his two boys to move. My ex partner was less than happy when I told him that we wanted to move out of town. I was still prepared for our daughter to see her dad every second weekend and the school holidays etc. My ex told me that if I was to move that it would be on his terms and conditions. He has been very threatening and of course demands that he has a private arrangement for child support of $50 a week. For the past 9 years I have done what I have felt has been in the best interest of our child and all I am asking is that I am able to move on with my life and for our daughter to keep up contact with her dad and his family but he is now telling me that I can't move and trying to make all these demands that I do this and do that etc so any advice would be greatly appreciated thanks
Submitted: 4 years ago.
Category: New Zealand Law
Expert:  Chris The Lawyer replied 4 years ago.

christhelawyer : HiWelcome to JustAnswer. My first response will follow shortly. Please feel free to follow up if anything is not clear
christhelawyer : If he continues to be difficult you may not have any option but to make an application to the Family Court for orders permitting relocation. Mediation is used first to try to negotiate a compromise, and hopefully this would fix the issue. But if not you would need to have a defended hearing about this.
christhelawyer : Try to avoid getting the child support mixed with this issue. The court does say that contact and parenting orders should not be affected by issues of child support. But if he is using this for blackmail to reduce his obligations, this can be difficult, but will not impress the judge if it goes that far.
christhelawyer : You are obviously touching on the principle issue, which is what is the child's best interests, and this will be at the centre of any decision.
christhelawyer : So you don't have just accept his terms and conditions, and can make this more formal if he becomes unreasonable. But if you cannot negotiate a resolution see a good family lawyer and get this application underway.