How JustAnswer Works:
  • Ask an Expert
    Experts are full of valuable knowledge and are ready to help with any question. Credentials confirmed by a Fortune 500 verification firm.
  • Get a Professional Answer
    Via email, text message, or notification as you wait on our site.
    Ask follow up questions if you need to.
  • 100% Satisfaction Guarantee
    Rate the answer you receive.
Ask P. Simmons Your Own Question
P. Simmons
P. Simmons, Military Lawyer
Category: Military Law
Satisfied Customers: 14278
Experience:  Retired Marine Corps lawyer and Veterans Services Officer (VSO) with 12+ yrs. of experience.
Type Your Military Law Question Here...
P. Simmons is online now
A new question is answered every 9 seconds

I was married 25 yrs to the same man. He was in the military

Customer Question

I was married 25 yrs to the same man. He was in the military 3 yrs got out, stayed out 8 yrs then went back in. While he was out we met, married, and started a family. My husband at the time was always cheating on me, always. He went back into the military in 1978 or 79 which the kids and I followed for 16 yrs. Less than a year after he retired I believe in 1995 with the military he started cheating again which I finally divorced him. He told me he would pay me $700 per month alimony, I was to get half of each raise he received which in all the years we've been divorced I've yet to see a penny more than the $700 per month. We had taken out a $100,000 term life policy on him with me sole beneficiary if anything ever happened, the beneficiary could not be changed and he was to make the payments. He had worked with insurance companies prior to going back into the military and at the time he retired I worked with State Farm so it wasn't like we didn't know anything about life insurance. If for any reason I had to take him back to court he had to pay for court fees. This man has taken 2 lie detector test and passed, honest! He said all you have to do is teach your mind to believe what you're saying is true. Who knows, for I sure don't! What I do know is no matter who he talks to he can make anyone believe him; he's that convincing! He beat me, he choked me, and kicked me while we were married. I was afraid to leave. I waited till our last child graduated from high school and found out about his cheating and filed for divorce. But I took him back to court because mainly due to the life insurance. He had given me $44 extra in my check to pay the life insurance because he didn't want his now wife to know that he was paying that for me. I shouldn't have agreed to that but I did. This term policy started out low but increase every 5 yrs. When the amount reached $112 per month it was extremely hard on me since I got laid off from my job and had my son in college which my ex didn't help with that at all but he told people he did. A friend of mine thought she had a good lawyer for me but it appears he had early alzheimer's and kept forgetting things. To make it a little shorter, I lost my case. Why, I don't know. Everything was in the decree; in black and white. How in the world could I have lost? My ex lied to my lawyer on paper he claimed he never got into trouble with the military which was not true. He got caught shop lifting in Killeen, TX when he was suppose to show up for a school at Ft. Hood., in Ft. Meade, Md. He got caught off base at a rest area in the back seat with another man naked, yes naked in the act. Which he almost got kicked out had I not of gone to therapy with him. I only went once because he blamed it all on me, and the therapist just said this is something 92% of men do but that doesn't make him gay. Well, if he's gay get a divorce and get the heck away from me and call it what it is! But she kept taking up for him so I walked out. She came after me telling me I had to come back that it was mandatory! I just told her it was mandatory for him but not me. I'm not in the military and I didn't do anything wrong! Deal with the guilty party! I tried to get a copy of his military record just to show he was lying but I never was able to. But the Judge was against me to begin with. He would not allow me to talk. He was constantly saying hearsay which a lot was, but his attorney was saying where my ex got his info on something, just like mine on the internet, my attorney didn't say anything and I looked up at him and said hearsay! hearsay! The judge let me know I'd better keep my mouth closed! Every Time my ex's attorney asked me a question the Judge would not allow me to finish my answer. When we received the answer (which I already knew what it was) my attorney said the Judge didn't even give a reason why he reached the decision he did. He just left it blank. I found out later the Judge and his wife are retired from the military. I just wondered if the Judge was just protecting another soldier? My ex didn't even have to get on the stand:
Submitted: 12 months ago.
Category: Military Law
Expert:  P. Simmons replied 12 months ago.

Hello! My name is ***** ***** I am a licensed attorney with more than 18 years of experience. I am here to assist you with your questions. Please understand that if I ask you for additional information, you are NOT charged again and our communications are NOT timed. So please see this as a relaxed conversation between friends. I am here to help

Also, if you would like to chat on the phone, let me know and I can make that happen.

I am sorry for this dilemma. But not sure I understand your specific question. I see you have several questions...would it help to talk on the phone? If so I will send an offer...if you accept happy to chat about this on the phone.

Customer: replied 11 months ago.
I appreciate your offer but at this time I decline due to the fact JAG is the one that I went to help write my decree although I had to hire a civilian attorney to go to court with me. JAG, mislead me in so many ways then the judge I had was retired military till I'm just not sure I can trust anyone that is connected to the military. I lost all my benefits with the military even though he and I were married 25 yrs and I spent 16 or 17 yrs with him in the military. We had a $100,000 term life policy which I was sole beneficiary in case something happened to him and he was to make the payment. Again, I was sole beneficiary with irreversible beneficiary but that to the judge decided he didn't owe that to me. I should have filed adultery for there were two people that called me to inform me that they saw him and his girlfriend and wanted me to get him for adultery and they would go to court with me but due to our children I chose not to. My mistake! Thank you for your offer, but at this point and due to the length of time of our divorce I don't think anything would come of it. Just still bitter at the court system and JAG. Women that follow their husbands in the military don't get the credit they deserve because a lot of soldiers will not stay without their families. Military wives are alone so many times in different states or countries while their husbands go somewhere else. While the husbands are gone the military wives play mother and father and most of the time have a fun time job. Being a military wife is hard and we get no credit, shame on our government!

Related Military Law Questions