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I am married to a very back man. I work all day and all

Customer Question
I am married to...

I am married to a very Laid back man. I work all day and all weekend and he is retired and remains at home, doing god knows what. He does not express any love or concern for me and I sometimes (most of the time) feel very overwhelmed and very lonely. I do not say anything as I am not sure how to approach this situation without seeming to accuse him of being lazy, unconcerned and unsupportive

Doctor's Assistant: How is your mood? Are you experiencing regular sleep disturbances (e.g. trouble falling asleep, waking up early)?

I sleep very well and wake up at 5:35 every morning

Doctor's Assistant: Anything else in your medical history you think the Psychologist should know?

I am the last of 6 children. I my mom passed away 10 years ago and I am not close with any of my siblings

Submitted: 7 months ago.Category: Mental Health
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Answered in 6 minutes by:
11/26/2017
Mental Health Professional: LeahMSWuofm, Clinical Social Worker replied 7 months ago
LeahMSWuofm
LeahMSWuofm, Clinical Social Worker
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 1,105
Experience: 10 years post-MSW experience
Verified

Hi, thank you for writing/ My name is***** am sorry to hear about how you are feeling. It sounds like you are not getting the attention and support you desire at this point in your marriage. A common conflict in marriage comes from lack of communication and also expecting one partner to know what the other feels, wants and needs. Can you tell me more about why you haven't brought up these concerns to your husband? Is there a way you can address this with him that isn't on the offense but instead, comes from a place of honesty and openness?

I look forward to talking!

-Leah

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Customer reply replied 7 months ago
I feel like I am asking too much
Customer reply replied 7 months ago
I feel that he is entitled to his peace and that I am asking too much.
But I long for if only ONE TIME to follow him instead of always leading the charge
But, like today, we had an appointment for 10am.
I made a decision to remain in bed to wait for him. He was still in bed at 9am.
Mental Health Professional: LeahMSWuofm, Clinical Social Worker replied 7 months ago

Thank you for that honest reply. Having a supportive, engaged husband is NOT asking too much. That is part of the commitment of marriage and while it isn't always easy and perfect, some expectations of reciprocal love, support, kindness, interest and affection should be the norm. Don't sell yourself short in this marriage! But don't expect him to know what you feel or want either. Or more importantly, don't expect him to know how to react even if he does know something is off. Communication is not always easy, but it is a necessity.

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Mental Health Professional: LeahMSWuofm, Clinical Social Worker replied 7 months ago

I apologize but i am not sure i understand about the story from earlier today? You waited in a bed for him but he never came? Or you missed the appointment because he didnt get himself up and going?

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Mental Health Professional: LeahMSWuofm, Clinical Social Worker replied 7 months ago

Hi, I just wanted to check back with you. We can chat until you feel ready to rate the service. How are you?

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Category: Mental Health
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