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I feel stressed, I don’t know if my stress levels are normal…

Hello , I feel...

Hello , I feel stressed , I don’t know if my stress levels are normal or do I need to seek medical help

Doctor's Assistant: Have you seen a doctor about this yet? What medications are you taking?

No , i’ve never seen a doctor on this , and I’m on no medication

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Answered in 2 minutes by:
11/21/2017
LeahMSWuofm
LeahMSWuofm, Clinical Social Worker
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 1,060
Experience: 10 years post-MSW experience
Verified

Hi, thank you for writing. My name is ***** ***** you give me more details about how you are being impacted by the stress - what symptoms are you having? How long have you been feeling this way? Do you have some understanding of why you feel so stressed?

I look forward to hearing more and talking this through with you...

-Laeh

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Customer reply replied 7 months ago
Hello Laeh,
I used to be a very hard worker and a high performer , at work . 3 years ago I had a daughter , and 1 year ago I had a son , after becoming a mom I feel my life is unbalanced , and my performance levels has dropped alot ,
Coming from the mayernity leave I got assigned a new role with new responsibilities , which should be considered more like a promotion , but I amnot performing up to the expectations , I an very unsatisfied with my performance , I think the main problem I have is that I am unable to focus & be organized , I miss alot of emails, my response to emails amd requests is very slow , people need to follow up with me alot to get the work done, and this is frustrating me , my mood swings are high (mostly internal ) , many days I drag myself from bed to work , but when I am at the office I will be smiling and pretemding to be energitic , same at meetings, and I might be satisfied of some of the work I do , but later when I find myself late with many of my projects / or forgot to do some of the important work , I will be very depressed , sometimes when I go to bed I wish that I never wake up to face tomorrow and the responsibilities I have , and this makes me feel even worse that I am willing to surrender and give up .
What makes it even worse is , i work in the training industry, I am suppposed to help people overcome their challenges, and whem I can’t help myself do that in the first place , I question my credibility .
I know many tools that I should use to be organized , but I am unable to commit to applying them .
I’ve been going through this for more than 6 months now , ups and downs, and I keep telling myself that I will change, I will get better , it can’t get any worse, but still , I am unable to overcome this.
By the way , my father is a psychiatrist, but I never spoke to him or to any of my family members openly about this because I don’t want them to worry about me.
Customer reply replied 7 months ago
The only person I share this with is my husband, and I don’t want to burden him with this as well

Hi :) Let me read through this and i'll reply...

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Customer reply replied 7 months ago
I keep thinking or resigning , but It feels like giving up, I am sure I can turn things around , but I don’t know how
Customer reply replied 7 months ago
The obvious thing you might say is that I need to plan, set SMART goals , and priortize and follow up my achievments , I know that I should do that , but I am unable to apply it

Difficulty concentrating

Trouble with making decvisions

Poor memory

Feelings of hopelessness (not wanting to wake up)

Feeling disorganized

Mood variability

Feeling down/depressed

Problems with sleep

The list above are signs and symptoms of depression that I pick up in your reply. It is quite possible that since having your children and with the changing rhythm of your life and responsibilities, depression has sprung up. Many people- 1/5, will suffer from some clinically significant period of depression at some point in their and it can come on for a multitude of reasons. Changes like having children, new responsibilities at work, etc have great potential for being the cause!

There is no shame in this condition but I bet that you can feel significantly better and more like your old self if you take some steps to be proactive. As you may know from your Dad, a combo of counseling and medication is the best treatment for depression, although certainly people ca thrive doing one or the other. I might suggest you consider starting with counseling since you have lept this struggle much to yourself. Simply talking about it and processing it, as well as poblem-solving, could be a great place to start and you may find that even that step helps you begin to heal. If you are willing to consider medications, I would make an appointment with your PCp to discuss. Antidepressant medications can offer a lot of help with many of the symptoms you mention ab are typically very safe and easy to tolerate. plus, you may not need them for longer than a period of 6-12 months if they can help you turn the tides.

As for what you can do right now - focus on taking care of your basic needs (hard to do when you have little's begging for your attention!) but prioritize sleep, diet, and exercise to the extent possible. Then,. start shifting your focus to living in the moment. This is the art of mindfulness and ca help you learn to get better control of the way you think, feel and behave so you are not feeling stuck in your own internal cycle of negativity.

There is no shame in what you are going through although I respect your keeping people out of it who may worry. my guess is they already feel something with you may be off, and considering your Dad's profession, probably have complete understanding for the trials and tribulations of the human mind. I feel confident you can feel better if you address this for what it may be - depression so don;t give up on yourself now! Trying to make big decisions when depression is looming is risky, although if you can identify that the promotion started these negative feelings, consider thinking more deeply about this in the comfort of a therapist's office so you can make an informed decision.

Please let me know if you have any additional thoughts or questions!

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I also appreciate your last reply. if it was that easy and there wasn;t something else clouding your motivation and ability to perform, then you probably wouldn't have needed to write today :)

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Customer reply replied 7 months ago
Thank you Leah , do you think I should speak to my father first? Or should I seek an independt psychiatric? Can the relationship between us affect his diagnosis ? I really don’t want my family to worry about me

Because you mentioned not wanting to worry your family, I suggest talking to someone independant first. I also do think the relationship with your Dad could cloud his assessment of you and it is also "unethical" for him to provide treatment to you as this dual-relationship may impact his judgment. With that being said, I don't want you to feel shame or weakness here and keeping this private may perpetuate some of those feelings. Of all people, your Dad being a psychiatrist should understand without being alarmed so perhaps, choosing to have a private conversation with him the fact that you are seeking treatment will be validating and supportive. This is especially so as you deserve the love and support of those who care about you! But again, no obligation to do so either. You certainly can choose to take this on on your own as of now, and involve them only if you need to.

LeahMSWuofm
LeahMSWuofm, Clinical Social Worker
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 1,060
Experience: 10 years post-MSW experience
Verified
LeahMSWuofm and 87 other Mental Health Specialists are ready to help you
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Customer reply replied 7 months ago
Thank you Leah , I will schedule an appointment with a psychiatric.

Thank you for the rating! I wish for you courage and strength and hope you feel your best very soon :)

-Leah

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