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How can I develop the necessary discipline to focus on

important things and ignore temptations...
How can I develop the necessary discipline to focus on important things and ignore temptations that waste my time?I am self employed, working in the software business. I have multiple projects to finish. They are fairly simple to finish, they just require some focused time in order to get them done.Despite customer expectations and deadlines, I tend to give up to my temptations and take advantage of the luxury of working from home. I waste time playing an online game and/or watching Youtube/TV shows. It all seems logical to do at the moment, but hours later I realize that I haven't gotten anything done, and before I know it, I'm too tired to get work done. I go to sleep with the intention of making up the time wasted the next day. However, I end up repeating the same cycle for days and sometimes weeks.I tend to have addictive behavior, I get easily addicted to habits that help me kill time without having to focus on anything. Even if those habits stop being entertaining.What is the best way to control this behavior?
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Answered in 3 hours by:
11/18/2017
Linda D.
Linda D., Psychotherapist, LMSW, CASAC
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 819
Experience: LMSW, CASAC
Verified

Welcome to JA. My name is ***** ***** I am a licensed psychotherapist in private practice in NYS. I am preparing my reply and will post in one moment.

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Thank you for reaching out to Just Answer, I am here to help you. I can hear your frustration with your behavior of wasting time playing online games, watching Youtube or TV instead of getting your work done. The frustration is a motivator that is inviting you to make some healthier decisions. Here are steps to take:

1). Identify the behavior(s) that need to be changed.

2). Thoroughly look at the cost to you mentally, physically, financially, emotionally, etc. for the behavior.

3). Honestly look at the BENEFIT to you for the behavior. This is a step most people do not address in their desire to change behavior. And yet unless you identify the mental, physical, emotional, social, behavioral, etc.benefits that you gain by your behaviors and come up with a plan to address each one you will be at high risk for continuing the behavior. For example if playing video games helps you to not think about what you are worried/anxiety about and you do not come up with a healthier way to deal with anxiety, you will continue to use video games even when you need to be working to deal with anxiety.

4). List all of the people that are somehow impacted and/or involved in your behaviors that can help you when you decide to change the behaviors. These folks will help you to stay motivated and not enable you to keep doing the same behaviors.

5). Make a decision of what you want to change and develop a PLAN on the steps you are going to take to change the behavior. For instance one part of your plan can be that you work x amt. of hours before allowing yourself to play 30 minutes of video games AND you set a timer on your watch for the 30 minutes

6). Evaluate on a weekly basis if the steps in your plan are working and giving you the desired results and whether the people you have enlisted to help you are the right ones. If you are not getting the results you want then it is time to go back to step 1-5 and revise your plan.

I hope these steps help you to male some changes in your behaviors. You may also want to read online about the addictive nature of being on our computers for endless hours. There is a lot of research being done on this subject now and when a behavior interferes with our ability to take care of our responsibilities then it is becoming a problem if it isn't already. Please let me know if you have any questions. Sincerely, ***** ***** LMSW, CASAC

Linda D.
Linda D., Psychotherapist, LMSW, CASAC
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 819
Experience: LMSW, CASAC
Verified
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Linda D.
Linda D.
Linda D., Psychotherapist, LMSW, CASAC
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 819
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Experience: LMSW, CASAC

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