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Well my wife is suddenly feeling depressed, snapping at our…

Well my wife is...

Well my wife is suddenly feeling depressed, snapping at our children...anxiety, shaking...etc. doesn't want to move

Doctor's Assistant: How long have you been dealing with this? Is there anything in particular that seems to make the symptoms better or worse?

Detached

Doctor's Assistant: Anything else in your medical history you think the Psychologist should know?

My wife not me

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Customer reply replied 9 months ago
My wife's father is a recovered alcoholic and her younger brother is a RAGING alcoholic for the past few years...in and out of rehab..(In Poland) - long story but all the symptoms and pain and suffering he is causing his family and kids...etc.
literally homeless and panhandling in her home town where everyone knows and sees him. My wife is here in US with me and we have a BEAUTIFUL family, boy 6, girl 3...they are incredibly happy and positive...lately in the past 4-6 weeks my wife has changed.
Customer reply replied 9 months ago
she has been dealing with this for years and has been a soldier...we do have some financial issues but nothing earth shattering...now that we I'm writing this down, it almost seems reasonable that it's becoming overwhelming for her.
Customer reply replied 9 months ago
we moved from our hometown, maryland to NY for my job but we have been adjusting well making new friends..etc. so that is good. I mean she seems ok at times...for example we went to a baseball game the other day. Of course instagram/facebook she seems happy as can be. LOL. but at home she is getting angry at very little things and displacing that on our kids.
Customer reply replied 9 months ago
I recently started a second part time job as a security officer overnight. With my day job i work 80 hours a week..and she has felt really guilty and bad that she is a stay at home mom. But I don't give her a hard time at all about it. We agreed she stay's home with kids because I don't believe in day care....what else...hmmm
Customer reply replied 9 months ago
I am not the affectionate type and she has expressed some concern that I don't do the kissy huggy thing as much as she would like...what else...trying to think of anything and everything and being honest with you...DR.
Answered in 27 minutes by:
8/21/2017
Juliet Cooper
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 51
Experience: Psychologist in private practice
Verified
Hi there, sounds like you are trying to understand what is going on with your wife and the changes that you have seen take place. I'm Dr. Juliet, a psychologist and will be happy to help support you. A few questions ... when did you move to New York? Moving (even when it's for positive reasons) can be very stressful. How have your children adjusted to the move? You are working a lot and your wife is spending most of her time with the children, does she also see other people? I assume your six-year-old son will be starting school soon. I look forward to hearing a few more details so I can make some helpful suggestions .
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Customer reply replied 9 months ago
Moved to NY 1 year ago. Children have adjusted fine...older one attending school. My wife has made new friends and attend many play dates. My son will be starting 1st grade in a few weeks.
Customer reply replied 9 months ago
her text message to me this morning: "Going to the gym with kids. Very frustrated, shaking and having bad thoughts...what the hell is wrong with me???" "I'm tired of living like that..."
I responded to your last message, but I am not sure that it went through. Please let me know. If not I Will reconstruct what
I wrote.
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Let me start again...it sounds like on the surface things are ok i.e. You have adjusted to your move to NY and your kids are doing well. First off please communicate to your wife that you are there for her and you will help to get her the support she needs. She is frightened and needs to know that she can take steps to feel better. You are a caring and supportive husband which is great and you also need to know that your wife should not have to suffer. You are busy and have a lot of responsibility, so please also think about ways to take care of yourself i.e. exercise, fun time with your family etc. I am not sure what she means by "bad thoughts" , you need to get a better idea of what these thoughts involve ....hurting herself or others?
Is your wife on medication? Going through hormonal changes i.e. Menopause.
I strongly recommend that you seek out a consultation with a psychiatrist. A Psychiatrist can evaluate whether medication Is a helpful option. It sounds like your wife has been feeling this way for a while and she deserves to feel better. Would you like me to help you to find a Psychiatrist in New York? Let me know your thoughts.
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Customer reply replied 9 months ago
no medication, not menopause (I think), she is only 37. Very active...yoga, pilates..running..etc.
Sure, if you can help by recommending anyone near Hicksville, NY. 11801.
Customer reply replied 9 months ago
OH, in Poland, she said the doctors said she had very high levels of testosterone or something for a women..not enough estrogen or something?
Customer reply replied 9 months ago
our last text exchange....
ME: Baby, I am here for you and will support you. We can get any help you need. You should not be suffering like this....
HER: I know baby, I'm getting paranoid about worse...thinking about death which is not me and it's scary. I don't know why this is happening to me now and I want it to go away. I want to be happy and think positive which I'm trying but is not working......I will be ok. I have to fight...This is verbatim.
Your wife is frightened and should not be having scary thoughts about death. It is not clear to me whether she is having suicidal thoughts, but she needs to be evaluated by a Psychiatrist. I don't know where you live in New York but you have several options ... you can go to an emergency room in any hospital, some also have psychiatric emergency rooms that are separate from medical and explain to them what is going on and have her see a psychiatrist ( this is obviously the quickest way or if you were feeling very fearful for her ) You can also make an appointment with a psychiatrist in your area. Again, most major hospitals will have a psychiatric department you can call outpatient psychiatry and inquire about outpatient treatment . You can also go on the website for psychology today and plug in your ZIP Code and they will give you lists of professionals in your area ..,look for a psychiatrist . She should also be evaluated by a gynecologist and they will do bloodwork and look at her hormonal levels sometimes drops in her moans can affect mood and anxiety. But first and foremost she must get a psychiatric consultation so she can get some relief from the pain that she is in. She sounds like a tough woman and says she wants to fight, however fighting means getting the right help not doing this on your own. You have responded in a caring and sensitive manner, keep up the good work, but please follow up on this it is very important. Please keep me updated and let me know what happens. I'm here to support you but it's important to take steps.
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Also, pass this information along to your wife if she should feel any need to give them a call . National Suicide Prevention LifelineWe can all help prevent suicide. The Lifeline provides 24/7, free and confidential support for people in distress, prevention and crisis resources for you or your loved ones, and best practices for professionals.1-***-***-****
Anyone could be struggling with suicide.
Please know that I am not making an assumption that your wife is having suicidal thoughts( I don't have enough detailed information ) but I do not want to leave anything to chance . You are doing a great job !
Juliet Cooper
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 51
Experience: Psychologist in private practice
Verified
Juliet Cooper and 87 other Mental Health Specialists are ready to help you
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Customer reply replied 9 months ago
Will do. thank you for the advice and reassuring words...
Glad I could be of help to you!
Feel free to Contact me in the future if you should need further support.
Have a wonderful weekend !
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Juliet Cooper
Juliet Cooper
Juliet Cooper, Doctor
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 51
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Experience: Psychologist in private practice

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