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Thank you. I did download a book about a little boy with…

Thank you. I did download...
Thank you. I did download a book about a little boy with autism, from the perspective of an autistic child, but it turned out to be 64 pages long and just a little too grown up -- even though it mentioned that the recommended age was 7. I really appreciate the suggestion.
I have tried to talk to him in moments where there was a bit of snuggle time, but he just closes up. I ask him how his day was, what was the best part of his day, and he either tells me "nothing" or says that he doesn't want to talk about it. I do worry because for the past couple of years, I have had a great deal of job stress and have had to work at home from the computer quite a bit (I am a college professor) on the tenure track. I am so worried that I have damaged him by having to work so much. We are loving parents. He just seems very detached right now and very self-conscious as well. I don't know have to get him back to being this extremely happy, outgoing mischievous kid that he used to be. He is a very smart little boy. He basically taught himself to read and was reading before age 4. Most people are quite surprised and impressed by how smart he is. I just hope that he can be a happy kid again. Thank you so much for the explanations and suggestions.
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Answered in 1 minute by:
2/24/2017
Dr. Mark
Dr. Mark, Psychotherapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 5,334
Experience: Dr. Mark is a PhD in psychology in private practice
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Hi. I'm not sure if you meant for this to be a separate question from your previous one. Either way, if you could please give a rating to the previous one so we can close it, that would be helpful.

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Customer reply replied 1 year ago
the page that I was on didn't give me the option of posting a reply or submitting a rating. With this reply it is.
Customer reply replied 1 year ago
I am sorry. It is not letting me submit the rating.

I just replied again. See if it will now, okay?

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Customer reply replied 1 year ago
This is really strange. It normally does allow me to submit a rating, but the stars and button are faded out and not accepting my submission. I am sending the image. I will definitely give you 5-stars when it allows me to do so. Thank you so much for your help and thorough answer.

Wow, I haven't encountered this; since I'm a psychologist and not a tech expert, I'm sorry to put you through this. But could you contact customer service to deal with it? I'd be grateful and then we'll continue.

Dr. Mark
Dr. Mark, Psychotherapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 5,334
Experience: Dr. Mark is a PhD in psychology in private practice
Verified
Dr. Mark and 87 other Mental Health Specialists are ready to help you
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Customer reply replied 1 year ago
Sure!

Hi. Thank you for the ratings. I appreciate it. I'm sorry it was a hassle.

You know, one of the toughest things is when our children change. And they do change. 8-9 years old there's a personality change that happens. He's smart and developmentally precocious, so it could be that he's changing earlier. Thus, part of this is unavoidable. We have to give them room to sometimes be people we don't necessarily want them to be. That will help them even out and institutionalize into who they will eventually become the good parts of what we love about them.

However, that said, when there are very sharp changes, we have to be watchful. This will be more important in a few years with the possibility of drugs and online chat issues.

But it's also a problem now. He's clamming up and he's exhibiting signs of issues being present. This is not yet ready for professional intervention. But it's a sign for you to not feel guilty and worried about the past. Rather, it's a call to action for you: you need to spend more time with him now and you need to not press him when he says nothing but give him more and more opportunities to open up. Invite it more often. Don't take "nothing" as a rebuff but as a trial balloon he's throwing out to see if you're really seriously interested. If you keep snuggling, playing, reading, talking with him you'll have more opportunity.

Also, ask questions. I recommend one new question per hour of play time with him. No more than that. He's too bright for interrogation. Questions that get to if there's bullying going on, if there's bullying of other kids that he's feeling bad about, maybe by him or maybe even where he's not involved but feels bad. Then there's the area of if it's hard to sit still that long. Then there's the area of his relationship with his teacher and if he needs help with it. Then there's the OCD: is he bothered by it? Does it confuse him?

And lots of other questions. Don't feel panicky that you've got to do something immediately. You don't. Use your working at home to build in breaks from work to be with him and gather lots of information. And enjoy him too!

All the best,

Dr. Mark

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