Mental Health

Have mental health questions? Ask a psychiatrist online

Ask an Expert,
Get an Answer ASAP!

This answer was rated:

I did a no no and tried to look up articles about what I…

I did a no no...
I did a no no and tried to look up articles about what I have and how pure O can sometimes be misdiagnosed as pedophila! Well I read a comment where one person says even if they've had these thoughts I still wouldn't let them be with my kids! Am I safe to be around kids?!? I don't see them that way!! I face timed my nephew and didn't see anything other then him being my nephew and a kid? How would a p feel? I know I'm not one! I see kids for kids!! That's why that comment got to me!
Show More
Show Less
Ask Your Own Mental Health Question
Answered in 12 minutes by:
11/14/2016
LeahMSWuofm
LeahMSWuofm, Clinical Social Worker
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 1,166
Experience: 10 years post-MSW experience
Verified
Unfortunately, the person who said that was simply ignorant. They don't understand the distinguishing between worries about this condition and actually having the condition. Pedophiles seek out ways to engage with and harm underage people for their own personal gain. They seek satisfaction from pedophilia. They don't think question it over and over.
Remember, rumination over this biased, ignorant and just plain wrong comment is just another example of a thought you need to let go of. It was a meaningless comment and you need to not let it wreak havoc on your self-esteem or awareness and acceptance of your condition. You know the truth. You know you're not a pedophile. You know you don't look at children and wonder about ways to engage with them in an inappropriate manner. You're just a normal a normal person with some ugly lies trapped inside your head. Keep letting those thoughts go, one at a time, one day at a time.
Thanks for requesting me,
Leah
LeahMSWuofm
LeahMSWuofm, Clinical Social Worker
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 1,166
Experience: 10 years post-MSW experience
Verified
LeahMSWuofm and 87 other Mental Health Specialists are ready to help you
Ask your own question now
Customer reply replied 1 year ago
I wouldn't be asking what if questions would I or saying no no no every time a thought comes up in my head if I were one huh!
Customer reply replied 1 year ago
What should I tell my psychologist when I see them the first time? Should I tell them everything!? I've been writing what I've been thinking down and that helps should I give them my journal! I've noticed some repetitive thoughts when I reread it.

Thank you for the positive rating and bonus :). Correct - you are not a pedophile an thinking about being one does not make you one. However, your engagement in this "compulsion" to keep comparing yourself to a true pedophile is exactly what we would want you to avoid doing. I get that it is so hard not to seek out this information as your brain is simply spinning and uncertainty is causing you to seek concrete. But that is the OCD driving you and we want you to stop empowering the OCD to any extent. So no more Googling, no more fact-checking, no more contemplating of the differences between you and a true pedophile. Instead, acceptance, calm, sticking to routines, even when challenging, and just letting the thoughts come and go without taking any action against them.

Hopefully you have selected a psychologist that has experience treating OCD, ideally through ERP. If so, then they have treated others with OCD and have respect and knowledge about your condition. And as you must note from your own searching of info, there is no shortage of others who suffer from OCD so spilling your guts to them about how you feel, how often you feel it, how intensely you feel it, and how you react to it is the basis for them to formulate a plan to best help you and nothing you say will surprise them. So just as you have been up front and honest with me, you'll be asked to do the same with them and they will help guide you through the tough parts. You can do it!! Just remember, while it seems novel and terrible, this is a well-know condition in the mental health community and therapists are trained to be empathetic, non-judgmental, safe people who you can share your life with, so take a deep breath, and let them know about you as openly and honestly and they will support you and your journey.

-Leah

Ask Your Own Mental Health Question
Customer reply replied 1 year ago
It is hard. And what you said about what they do I now question myself well do I do that then I have to remind myself no I see them as just kids! I did before the thought and now! But a part of me is always checking. I hate that part about myself. I cried myself to sleep and can't focus today.
Customer reply replied 1 year ago
My mind is trying to make me think that I want to think those thoughts and them and that I wanted to think the earlier thoughts but I didn't. They just pop up at random and I can't help it! It's not like I sit and blantantly think and I never want to do that! But my mind is making me think that I do! What can I tell my mind that that's not the case?
Customer reply replied 1 year ago
I was watching my favorite tv show this afternoon and it had a couple on there kissing and I was you know day dreaming about whenever that could be me but I don't know if my mind played tricks on me or if I'm overthinking but I can't remember if I pictured myself kissing an adult or kid. I'm remember being anxious and now I'm scared because I don't remember! I think it was an adult but now I'm not sure I hate this! Then I was holding my hands to my face and I thought of me kissing a child. Almost like I wanted it but I didn't! I immediately said stop stop stop over and over! I don't want these thoughts!! Why won't they stop!?!

Remember, the only thing to do with these thoughts is learn to accept that they are there and meaningless. That will free their grip, once you get to that point, and it doesn't happen overnight so be patient and kind to yourself. Right now, you are not yet fully accepting the fact that you have OCD and these unwanted intrusive thoughts are currently part of your day. I can't express enough that the allowance of your brain to overthink, question, prove wrong, test, and doubt these things is the trap. Of course you weren't' daydreaming about making out with a child. But the second you start to overthink it, it gets called in to question. When that initial tinge of doubt popped in, you needed to just let if go without turning it into something that got your mind wondering at all.

Sadly but honestly, part of the reasons these thoughts won't stop is because you are letting them control you even though they are completely meaningless and invalid. You are paying a huge amount of attention to them right now. Remember, this is a battle that you can only win by not acting towards those thoughts. While I absolutely appreciate helping and reminding you of this, even writing to me here, especially about every blip in the day, is a compulsion and is completely reinforcing this disorder.

We have talked in previous posts about what you can tell your mind when a thought pops up. What simple phrase would you like to say to your OCD, that is non-judgmental and easy and feels right to you? Something like, "Hey OCD. You're not bringing me down today." Can you come up with one?

Ask Your Own Mental Health Question
Customer reply replied 1 year ago
It's not me...its my OCD! It's just a lie and I'm not going to dwell on it anymore! Anything like that to get me to my appointment in December? I guess I can think I'm getting help and I'm going to beat you! You won't control my life forever you've had 4 years of control I'm taking my life!!
Customer reply replied 1 year ago
I also found acting like I'm boxing OCD to black eyes and bruises helps! Kickboxing! I'm done letting it control my life!! I've had it since 2009ish just different forms related to news stories but I will NOT LET IT CONTROL ME ANYMORE!! ELISE IT WILL TAKE TIME BUT WE'RE GETTING HELP AND WE WILL GET BETTER WE MUST GET BETTER!! That way you can be the teacher you want to be!! That way you can be the aunt and sister you want to be!! That way you can be the daughter you want to be!! Say this to myself everyday I will believe it!!

Yes!! Kickbox the helk out of that OCD and knock it out!! You got this!!!!!

Ask Your Own Mental Health Question
Was this answer helpful?

How JustAnswer works

step-image
Describe your issueThe assistant will guide you
step-image
Chat 1:1 with a mental health professionalLicensed Experts are available 24/7
step-image
100% satisfaction guaranteeGet all the answers you need
Ask LeahMSWuofm Your Own Question
LeahMSWuofm
LeahMSWuofm
LeahMSWuofm, Clinical Social Worker
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 1,166
1,166 Satisfied Customers
Experience: 10 years post-MSW experience

LeahMSWuofm is online now

A new question is answered every 9 seconds

How JustAnswer works:

  • Ask an ExpertExperts are full of valuable knowledge and are ready to help with any question. Credentials confirmed by a Fortune 500 verification firm.
  • Get a Professional AnswerVia email, text message, or notification as you wait on our site. Ask follow up questions if you need to.
  • 100% Satisfaction GuaranteeRate the answer you receive.

JustAnswer in the News:

Ask-a-doc Web sites: If you've got a quick question, you can try to get an answer from sites that say they have various specialists on hand to give quick answers... Justanswer.com.
JustAnswer.com...has seen a spike since October in legal questions from readers about layoffs, unemployment and severance.
Web sites like justanswer.com/legal
...leave nothing to chance.
Traffic on JustAnswer rose 14 percent...and had nearly 400,000 page views in 30 days...inquiries related to stress, high blood pressure, drinking and heart pain jumped 33 percent.
Tory Johnson, GMA Workplace Contributor, discusses work-from-home jobs, such as JustAnswer in which verified Experts answer people’s questions.
I will tell you that...the things you have to go through to be an Expert are quite rigorous.

What Customers are Saying:

I can go as far as to say it could have resulted in saving my sons life and our entire family now knows what bipolar is and how to assist and understand my most wonderful son, brother and friend to all who loves him dearly. Thank you very much

Corrie MollPretoria, South Africa

I thank-you so much! It really helped to have this information and confirmation. We will watch her carefully and get her in for the examination and US right away if things do not improve. God bless you as well!

ClaudiaAlbuquerque, NM

Outstanding response time less than 6 minutes. Answered the question professionally and with a great deal of compassion.

KevinBeaverton, OR

Suggested diagnosis was what I hoped and will take this info to my doctor's appointment next week.
I feel better already! Thank you.

ElanorTracy, CA

Thank you to the Physician who answered my question today. The answer was far more informative than what I got from the Physicians I saw in person for my problem.

JulieLockesburg, AR

You have been more help than you know. I seriously don't know what my sisters situation would be today if you had not gone above and beyond just answering my questions.

John and StefanieTucson, AZ

I have been dealing with an extremely serious health crisis for over three years, and one your physicians asked me more questions, gave me more answers and encouragement than a dozen different doctors who have been treating me!!

Janet VPhoenix, AZ

< Previous | Next >

Meet the Experts:

Dr. Keane

Dr. Keane

Therapist

1,379 satisfied customers

Clinical Psychology PhD, Licensed Professional Counselor with experience in marriage/family, teens and child psychology.

TherapistMaryAnn

TherapistMaryAnn

Therapist

4,111 satisfied customers

Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues.

Dr. Olsen

Dr. Olsen

Psychologist

2,336 satisfied customers

PsyD Psychologist

Norman M.

Norman M.

Principal psychotherapist in private practice. Newspaper contributor, over 2000 satisfied clients on JA

2,246 satisfied customers

ADHP(NC), DEHP(NC), ECP, UKCP Registered.

Dr. Michael

Dr. Michael

Psychologist

2,177 satisfied customers

Licensed Ph.D. Clinical Health Psychology with 30 years of experience in private practive and as a clinical psychology university professor.

Steven Olsen

Steven Olsen

Therapist

1,728 satisfied customers

More than twenty years of expertise in counseling, psychological diagnosis and education

Anna

Anna

Mental Health Professional

1,656 satisfied customers

Licensed Clinical Social Worker with 29 years in addictions and mental health.

< Previous | Next >

Related Mental Health Questions
Does OCD get worse when your emotional? My grandpa passed
Does OCD get worse when your emotional? My grandpa passed away last night and those thoughts tried to come back up again and they've been after me this morning. Can you not remember fully what you tho… read more
LeahMSWuofm
LeahMSWuofm
Clinical Social Worker
Master's Degree
1,166 satisfied customers
I can't go on any longer.. deep down my thoughts keep
I can't go on any longer.. deep down my thoughts keep telling me I'm a pedofile and i want these thoughts.. i want them to go away i do not wanna be a pedofile.. I'm scared out of my mind and just wan… read more
TherapistMaryAnn
TherapistMaryAnn
Therapist
Master's Degree
4,111 satisfied customers
I have talked to you before and you helped a lot. Ill start
Hello I have talked to you before and you helped a lot. Ill start over by saying and i am a female who has sexual thoughts towards kids and i want them to go away. Age 13 i touched a child in a bad wa… read more
Dr. Z
Dr. Z
Psychologist
Doctoral Degree
9,633 satisfied customers
Unwanted thoights when I get stressed why, I was never
Sexual unwanted thoights when I get stressed why, I was never molestated as a child. When I was little maybe, 9 or so I touched a child, but I knew I was wrong so I told my mom and since than I have b… read more
Dr. Z
Dr. Z
Psychologist
Doctoral Degree
9,633 satisfied customers
Kate. I will make some calls to the chaplain and to
Hi Kate. I will make some calls to the chaplain and to children's services in his county tomorrow. I talked to C' sister again today and their mom was there and she said for the sister not to try to t… read more
TherapistMaryAnn
TherapistMaryAnn
Therapist
Master's Degree
4,111 satisfied customers
The thing is, Kate, I didn't know what they would do - I
The thing is, Kate, I didn't know what they would do - I couldn't be sure what I was gaining. but I DID know what I was giving to them - I didn't know the full consequences and maybe not how much it w… read more
TherapistMaryAnn
TherapistMaryAnn
Therapist
Master's Degree
4,111 satisfied customers
I'm not sure this is a mental health question so if it's not
I'm not sure this is a mental health question so if it's not you'll have to advise me. I have lived in my current house for ten years. Soon after I moved in I became friends with one of my neighbours,… read more
Dr.G.
Dr.G.
Counseling Psychologist
Doctoral Degree
450 satisfied customers
My 67 yr. old has been living with us (wife + 2 kids) for 5
My 67 yr. old has been living with us (wife + 2 kids) for 5 months while her house is being rebuilt. On 2 or 3 occasions she swears that I have "badmouthed" her while others were present. Only she hea… read more
Suzanne
Suzanne
Therapist in Private Practice
Master\u0027s Degree
338 satisfied customers
After 6 years, and trying everything his kids still do not
After 6 years, and trying everything his kids still do not like me. They have given their father an ultimatim Her or us. I have been told they will not go to visit out of town family if I go. They hav… read more
psychlady
psychlady
Clinical Director
Master\u0027s Degree
3,517 satisfied customers
My friend has a nephew suffering from Paranoid Schizophrenia
My friend has a nephew suffering from Paranoid Schizophrenia who was living on the street downtown, a week ago he picked him up and brought him home to live with him. He told me he's in way over his h… read more
Steven Olsen
Steven Olsen
Therapist
Master's Degree
1,728 satisfied customers
I am dating a 56 year old guy who is coming out of a cold
I am dating a 56 year old guy who is coming out of a cold and passionless 20 year marriage and whose wife is taking him to the cleaners. We went out 10 times and he said he loved me. We couldn't find … read more
Dr. Mark
Dr. Mark
Doctoral Degree
129 satisfied customers
My sister recently died of Cancer leaving behind a 4 year
My sister recently died of Cancer leaving behind a 4 year old son and her Narcissist husband. I would like to continue some kind of even keeled relationship with this man so I can see my nephew. Is th… read more
Dr Rossi
Dr Rossi
Doctoral Degree
1,564 satisfied customers
My mother and stepfather are having problems. My Mom is
My mother and stepfather are having problems. My Mom is bipolar (disable) and stepfather is paranoid schizophenric (sp?). The problems began when my brother ask them to move out there to help the with… read more
Dr. Mark
Dr. Mark
Doctoral Degree
129 satisfied customers
Subj: -Polar Disease. My nephew in Georgia has just been
Subj: Bi-Polar Disease. My nephew in Georgia has just been diagnosed with bi-polar disease. He is also an alcoholic. Can you tell me if he can get help from the State of Georgia of apply for Medical D… read more
Cathy
Cathy
Master's Degree
221 satisfied customers
My daughters have an older male cousin whose parents were
My daughters have an older male cousin whose parents were drug addicts, who was abandoned by his mother, and father (now sober) has had multiple girlfriends with emotional problems that lived with the… read more
Dr Karen
Dr Karen
Psychotherapist
Doctoral Degree
75 satisfied customers
A couple years ago I was in a relationship with a girl who
A couple years ago I was in a relationship with a girl who had a toddler at the time - 18 month old. I had a very overwhelming feeling of wanting to harm the child at certain times when I was around h… read more
Anna
Anna
Mental Health Professional
Master's Degree
1,656 satisfied customers
My sister (41 years old) is a widow. She had been dating her
My sister (41 years old) is a widow. She had been dating her late husband continuously since age 18, and married him at approximately age 28. They were the same age. At the time of her husbands death,… read more
Tamara
Tamara
Psychotherapist
Master\u0027s Degree
1,071 satisfied customers
My 19 month old grand daughter has a six year old half
My 19 month old grand daughter has a six year old half brother. We are very concerned about her well being because of several behavioral instances involving the brother. He is the victum of divorce an… read more
Lively
Lively
Psychologist
Doctoral Degree
112 satisfied customers
Disclaimer: Information in questions, answers, and other posts on this site ("Posts") comes from individual users, not JustAnswer; JustAnswer is not responsible for Posts. Posts are for general information, are not intended to substitute for informed professional advice (medical, legal, veterinary, financial, etc.), or to establish a professional-client relationship. The site and services are provided "as is" with no warranty or representations by JustAnswer regarding the qualifications of Experts. To see what credentials have been verified by a third-party service, please click on the "Verified" symbol in some Experts' profiles. JustAnswer is not intended or designed for EMERGENCY questions which should be directed immediately by telephone or in-person to qualified professionals.

Disclaimer: Information in questions, answers, and other posts on this site ("Posts") comes from individual users, not JustAnswer; JustAnswer is not responsible for Posts. Posts are for general information, are not intended to substitute for informed professional advice (medical, legal, veterinary, financial, etc.), or to establish a professional-client relationship. The site and services are provided "as is" with no warranty or representations by JustAnswer regarding the qualifications of Experts. To see what credentials have been verified by a third-party service, please click on the "Verified" symbol in some Experts' profiles. JustAnswer is not intended or designed for EMERGENCY questions which should be directed immediately by telephone or in-person to qualified professionals.

Show MoreShow Less

Ask Your Question

x