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Therapist Leslie
Therapist Leslie, Mental Health Professional
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 333
Experience:  Owner and Psychotherapist at Self-Employed, Private Practice
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I've been married to my husband for 21 yrs. He has a problem

Customer Question

I've been married to my husband for 21 yrs. He has a problem with lying to me and about me to other people. Even when confronted with a blatant and obvious lie, he becomes enraged and belligerent with me. He would never admit to lying about anything. I have no idea about the depth of his deception. The worst has been lying about other women and leaving me a few years ago; accusing me of lying about my diagnosis of MS by the Mayo Clinic. He told anyone that would listen that I lied about the diagnosis and that's why he left me. I eventually produced my medical records as proof, and he eventually came back home. Never apologized for defaming my character. How do I handle this man?
Submitted: 9 months ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Therapist Leslie replied 9 months ago.

Good afternoon and thank you so much for your message. I realize it's difficult to reach out. Please know I honor your courage.

My name is ***** ***** I am a psychotherapist in the Metro Boston area of the United States.

Ohhhh Jenny, my heart aches for you as this situation is horrible. I am so sorry this is your reality. Your husband has some serious psychiatric issues....and I'm very sorry to have to say this. He needs help and he needs help immediately. I hope that if he accepts professional help, he will do the necessary work so the two of you can have a relationship. If he refuses, I am so sorry to say you will have to move forward. You are constantly fighting to maintain a level of reality to an individual who does not live in it. Even after being confronted with the clear facts, he still takes no ownership of his lies and anger and rage. He is, sweet soul, a dangerous man at this point.

I truly hope he is open to getting professional help. This process will, no doubt, be long and it may still not be enough. In the meanwhile, please try to take good care of yourself. Please find an amazing therapist, eat well, attend your doctors appointments, do yoga (if you are physically able) and pray/meditate. Become as strong as you can possibly be on body and mind. Surround yourself with those who support and love you and don't loose focus on yourself.

I am sure this is not what you want to hear and am so sorry to have deliver such news. Please know you are in my thoughts.

Have I answered your question? Is there anything else I can do to assist you further? I want to ensure you are pleased with my service. I also gently request you provide a star rating for me. Of course, we can continue to talk after the rating is provided.

Please take good care of yourself and feel free to contact me with any questions you may have.

Warm regards,

Therapist Leslie