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LeahMSWuofm, Clinical Social Worker
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 586
Experience:  10 years post-MSW experience
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I need help determining if I am crazy or a stalker/creep,

Customer Question

I need help determining if I am crazy or a stalker/creep, etc. I am 28 year old female and I have noticed that I look in peoples windows when walking or driving by. I don't stand there and look in, but sometimes I will glance as I walk or drive by (sometimes at a slower pace). when I was younger (young teenager and as a child) I would watch neighbors from my bedroom window-they included a girl waiting for the bus in the morning and an older woman neighbor. what does this mean? am I crazy/stalker, etc? Can you ask me some questions to help me determine this?
Submitted: 10 months ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  LeahMSWuofm replied 10 months ago.

Hello and thanks for writing to us. My name is***** am sorry you are having these worries about being a stalker/crazy. I think one primary question is whether or not this behavior interferes with your life causing you impairments in your ability to function in work, home life, and in interpersonal relationships. Does this behavior interfere, such as you find yourself spending hours doing this when you should be doing something else? The other thing I wonder is whether you derive sexual pleasure from these activities?

If this does not caused you marked distress, is not harmful to others, and is not considered a sexual activity that you feel you cannot control, then it is hugely unlikely that this behavior would even be considered abnormal. If you were a stalker or crazy, you would not be worrying about analyzing your behavior. You would simply seek it out for the associated pleasure or because you felt unable to control it. People are naturally curious of others and how they live their lives. We all take opportunity to glance in windows and people-watch. It helps us gain a sense for normal in a culture dictated by social norms and also helps give us a comparison between ourselves and others to know how we stack up.

So the real questions that would need to be answered are if this causes you great emotional distress and if it impacts or interferes with you ability to live a normal life. If the answers are no, then I think this is likely more an anxiety issue where you are worrying needlessly and overthinking things. Just last night, I was home with my two children and we live on a busy walking path. I had failed to close our main door to let in some air and from the couch, can see people passing by. I did watch for a couple minutes and of the few people that passed, at least two of them glanced into our open door. I think this is just a natural thing we all do and does not imply there is anything crazy - we are just curious about how other people live.

I hope this helps!!


Expert:  LeahMSWuofm replied 10 months ago.

Hello, I noticed this question remains open and wanted to know if I could help any further before you provide me a rating? Let me know!