First, you did the right thing seeking help with your symptoms. And it sounds like from the symptoms you listed that Anxiety and OCD would be the correct diagnoses. In that case, anxiety is very treatable with therapy and OCD is helped by both therapy and medications.
What you are experiencing with the distressing thoughts is very common with anxiety and OCD. I can reassure you that you are not alone and that your fear of acting on your thoughts indicates that you care very much about your children. Just because you have thoughts does not mean you will act on them. People have many thoughts throughout the day that they do not act on. Thoughts are just that- thoughts. But in your case, your thoughts are arousing anxiety which becomes distressing to you making you feel out of control.
If you feel your therapist and psychiatrist are helping you, then continue with them. Therapy is the best treatment for anxiety and the psychiatrist can find the right medication to help you with OCD. You can also do many things to help yourself. The trick is trying many things to find what works for you.
OCD thoughts can be handled through a variety of ways:
Learn to relax- this helps a lot because one of the main issues with OCD thoughts and compulsions is the anxiety you experience with them, triggering the urge to act out. So learning how to keep calm when dealing with these thoughts can help. Here is a link to help you learn Progressive Relaxation, one of the best ways to control your anxiety:
Write down your thoughts- by keeping a journal so you have a place to express your thoughts when they do bother you. It can also help to go back and see your progress or look at repeating patterns and how you handled them.
Make a list of activities- things you can do to distract yourself when you do experience OCD thoughts. Exercise, calling someone or watching a movie for example.
Repeating good thoughts- Make a list of thoughts that comfort you. "I am ok" "These are just thoughts, nothing more" "I am not alone with this problem" etc. When you feel anxious or even when you just have a few moments in your day, read these thoughts through. It can help to have something to turn to when you feel your thoughts going in a bad direction.
Give yourself a break- realize that OCD is caused by physical imbalances in the brain as well as anxiety. So telling yourself things like "This is just a physical response and it is not my fault" or "I can control this any way I want" and doing another activity instead of giving in helps as well.
Do not give your obsession meaning- The more you focus on it, the more importance you give it. So treat it like it's nothing. "It's only my thoughts. It does not mean anything".
Cognitive behavior therapy can help a lot as well. It assists you in "retraining" your brain to think other thoughts and calming yourself so you don't feel the need to respond to the thoughts as much.
Read as much as you can about OCD and anxiety how to address both. The more you educate yourself, the better chance you will find things you can do to help yourself.
I hope this was helpful,
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