Mental Health

Have Mental Health Questions? Ask a Psychiatrist Online

Ask an Expert,
Get an Answer ASAP!

Mental Health

I have a boyfriend whom I love very much and I would like to

Customer Question
eventually have a more intimate...
I have a boyfriend whom I love very much and I would like to eventually have a more intimate sexual relationship. He wants to wait and see what develops as we get to know each other better (which I think is noble). I text him every morning and each night with very romantic messages, his responses are appreciative and loving but not on the same level as mine to him. Once I got busy in the morning and didn't text him and he made it a point to tell me he didn't get my text and wondered what happened. He apparently likes the attention I pay him because if I stop he doesn't like it. Any thoughts on what's going on in his head and how you think I should go forward? He is a former Catholic seminarian with very little dating experience and has expressed a bisexual mindset.
Submitted: 1 year ago.Category: Mental Health
Show More
Show Less
Ask Your Own Mental Health Question
Answered in 16 minutes by:
7/1/2016
Mental Health Professional: LeahMSWuofm, Clinical Social Worker replied 1 year ago
LeahMSWuofm
LeahMSWuofm, Clinical Social Worker
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 775
Experience: 10 years post-MSW experience
Verified

Hello Lee, thank you for writing to us. My name is ***** ***** I'd like to help. It sounds like you have found yourself in a very nice relationship with a man who is respectful. Your statement of his inexperience is likely a significant factor in his wanting to take it slow, as you mention. Since you state you love him, there is clearly going to be some room for patience on your end in regards ***** ***** getting comfortable enough to be intimate with you and I absolutely encourage you to continue to express you own need for intimacy through flirty/romantic texts, touching, etc. His more bland responses are again, likely a reflection of his inexperience and timidness.

However, as you state he is your boyfriend, a natural component and right in relationships is that of intimacy if one partner desires it. It sounds like you have spoken before about the matter and he has told you he would like to take it slow which is okay, but there will become a time when your needs and rights to intimacy with a trusted partner should be "honored". Otherwise, this relationship would be considered platonic, and it sounds like that is not your hope. I would worry that if too long goes by with him continuing to delay things, you will become frustrated and quickly begin to question the relationship and it's possibilities.

First and foremost, continue to be open and honest with your boyfriend about your needs. As long as you feel okay with the pace, then ride it out. But if you begin to feel unsettled, disappointed, in need of more, be proactive in making this known to him. As I said, you have a right to be a sexual being who has needs that are preferably met when you have a good partner in a committed relationship and it sounds like you believe this relationship to be that. Hopefully he understands this and steps out of his comfort zone a bit, even if the initial intimate steps continue at a slower pace.

Hope this helps! Please let me know if you have more to add. I look forward to hearing back!

-Leah

Ask Your Own Mental Health Question
Ask LeahMSWuofm Your Own Question
LeahMSWuofm
LeahMSWuofm
LeahMSWuofm, Clinical Social Worker
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 775
775 Satisfied Customers
Experience: 10 years post-MSW experience

LeahMSWuofm is online now

A new question is answered every 9 seconds

How JustAnswer works:

  • Ask an ExpertExperts are full of valuable knowledge and are ready to help with any question. Credentials confirmed by a Fortune 500 verification firm.
  • Get a Professional AnswerVia email, text message, or notification as you wait on our site. Ask follow up questions if you need to.
  • 100% Satisfaction GuaranteeRate the answer you receive.

JustAnswer in the News:

Ask-a-doc Web sites: If you've got a quick question, you can try to get an answer from sites that say they have various specialists on hand to give quick answers... Justanswer.com.
JustAnswer.com...has seen a spike since October in legal questions from readers about layoffs, unemployment and severance.
Web sites like justanswer.com/legal
...leave nothing to chance.
Traffic on JustAnswer rose 14 percent...and had nearly 400,000 page views in 30 days...inquiries related to stress, high blood pressure, drinking and heart pain jumped 33 percent.
Tory Johnson, GMA Workplace Contributor, discusses work-from-home jobs, such as JustAnswer in which verified Experts answer people’s questions.
I will tell you that...the things you have to go through to be an Expert are quite rigorous.

What Customers are Saying:

I can go as far as to say it could have resulted in saving my sons life and our entire family now knows what bipolar is and how to assist and understand my most wonderful son, brother and friend to all who loves him dearly. Thank you very much

Corrie MollPretoria, South Africa

I thank-you so much! It really helped to have this information and confirmation. We will watch her carefully and get her in for the examination and US right away if things do not improve. God bless you as well!

ClaudiaAlbuquerque, NM

Outstanding response time less than 6 minutes. Answered the question professionally and with a great deal of compassion.

KevinBeaverton, OR

Suggested diagnosis was what I hoped and will take this info to my doctor's appointment next week.
I feel better already! Thank you.

ElanorTracy, CA

Thank you to the Physician who answered my question today. The answer was far more informative than what I got from the Physicians I saw in person for my problem.

JulieLockesburg, AR

You have been more help than you know. I seriously don't know what my sisters situation would be today if you had not gone above and beyond just answering my questions.

John and StefanieTucson, AZ

I have been dealing with an extremely serious health crisis for over three years, and one your physicians asked me more questions, gave me more answers and encouragement than a dozen different doctors who have been treating me!!

Janet VPhoenix, AZ

< Previous | Next >

Meet the Experts:

Dr. Keane

Dr. Keane

Therapist

1,379 satisfied customers

Clinical Psychology PhD, Licensed Professional Counselor with experience in marriage/family, teens and child psychology.

TherapistMarryAnn

TherapistMarryAnn

Therapist

4,021 satisfied customers

Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues.

Dr. Olsen

Dr. Olsen

Psychologist

2,336 satisfied customers

PsyD Psychologist

Norman M.

Norman M.

Principal psychotherapist in private practice. Newspaper contributor, over 2000 satisfied clients on JA

2,246 satisfied customers

ADHP(NC), DEHP(NC), ECP, UKCP Registered.

Dr. Michael

Dr. Michael

Psychologist

2,177 satisfied customers

Licensed Ph.D. Clinical Health Psychology with 30 years of experience in private practive and as a clinical psychology university professor.

Steven Olsen

Steven Olsen

Therapist

1,728 satisfied customers

More than twenty years of expertise in counseling, psychological diagnosis and education

Anna

Anna

Mental Health Professional

1,656 satisfied customers

Licensed Clinical Social Worker with 29 years in addictions and mental health.

< Previous | Next >

Related Mental Health Questions
Severe anxiety, by- polar manic depress. 6 years, being in
severe anxiety, by- polar manic depress. JA: How long have you been dealing with this? Is there anything in particular that seems to make the symptoms better or worse? Customer: 6 years, being in the … read more
Dr. Kaushik
Dr. Kaushik
PSYCHIATRIST ( MD Psychiatry)
Doctoral Degree
204 satisfied customers
I have chronic depression and was taking wellbutrin 300 mg
Hello I have chronic depression and was taking wellbutrin 300 mg with pristiq 100 mg For 4 years I've also taken valdoxan 100 mg to help me sleep for 4 months but it gave me twichings The medication s… read more
Dr. Kaushik
Dr. Kaushik
PSYCHIATRIST ( MD Psychiatry)
Doctoral Degree
204 satisfied customers
I am currently on depakote and invega trinza I was wondering
i am currently on depakote and invega trinza I was wondering what can help me get motivated. I also am going to ask my doctor if i can take wellbutrin … read more
Dr. Kaushik
Dr. Kaushik
PSYCHIATRIST ( MD Psychiatry)
Doctoral Degree
204 satisfied customers
My primary care doctor gave me a sort of diagnosis for adult
Hello, my primary care doctor gave me a sort of diagnosis for adult add but because that isn't in her expertise. We've been spending almost two years trying to find the right meds (side note: I also h… read more
JohnMichaels,MS,LPC
JohnMichaels,MS,LPC
Counselor
Master\u0027s Degree
171 satisfied customers
OKMH-VZ I suffer from much fatigue, that may stem from
OKMH-VZ I suffer from much fatigue, that may stem from depression. I was on Wellbutrin which was helping somewhat , but not enough, so I was told Prozac is activating so I've added to my 300 mg of Wel… read more
Dr. Kaushik
Dr. Kaushik
PSYCHIATRIST ( MD Psychiatry)
Doctoral Degree
204 satisfied customers
Three years ago I was diagnosed with PTSD by a local
Three years ago I was diagnosed with PTSD by a local psychiatrist. I went to him as I was stuck and having a hard time completing any of my household paperwork, I.e., bills, taxes, cling accounts, etc… read more
Linda D.
Linda D.
Master\u0027s Degree
795 satisfied customers
I've been taking Wellbutrin off and on for 15 years to treat
I've been taking Wellbutrin off and on for 15 years to treat ADD and mild HA The Wellbutrin started to become ineffective and it also began to make me have the jitters, like I drank too much coffee I … read more
Dr. Kaushik
Dr. Kaushik
PSYCHIATRIST ( MD Psychiatry)
Doctoral Degree
204 satisfied customers
I was dx with add, ocd tendencies and anxiety 10 years ago.
I was dx with add, ocd tendencies and anxiety 10 years ago. I stopped the adderal.meds bc if the crash they caused. I hear there is a time release that works good but in a new state and need doc tnst … read more
llw26
llw26
Private Practice
Doctoral Degree
11 satisfied customers
I am looking to add supplements to my diet. Specifically
Hi. I am looking to add supplements to my diet. Specifically L-Lipoic Acid, L-Theanine, L-Carnitine, and Cleated Magnesium … read more
Dr. Kaushik
Dr. Kaushik
PSYCHIATRIST ( MD Psychiatry)
Doctoral Degree
204 satisfied customers
My best friend "J" was diagnosed with ADD (or ADHD, I'm not
Hello, my best friend "J" was diagnosed with ADD (or ADHD, I'm not sure the difference), we are in our 40s. But I don't see her having this problem. When she was first diagnosed I just thought, oh it'… read more
Linda D.
Linda D.
Master\u0027s Degree
795 satisfied customers
I used to take Dexedrine for adult ADD the dr thinks I
Hello, I used to take Dexedrine for adult ADD the dr thinks I should go back on it. I have been having trouble running my business and growing my business and getting organized. My son also used to ta… read more
Dr. Mark
Dr. Mark
Doctoral Degree
129 satisfied customers
Im concerned that i may have ADD. It runs in the family with
Hi im concerned that i may have ADD. It runs in the family with my mother, brother and daughter. Can you tell me what assessments are necessary to do please. Im 42 and life is getting out of control w… read more
Therapist Leslie
Therapist Leslie
Masters, Professional Psychology
5 satisfied customers
Just looking for information to see if i suffer from ADD, I
just looking for information to see if i suffer from ADD … read more
Linda D.
Linda D.
Master\u0027s Degree
795 satisfied customers
I just started wellbutrin XL 150 mg to add with my 20 mg
I just started wellbutrin XL 150 mg to add with my 20 mg prozac (I have been on prozac for 20 years and works great, but the last few years I might be getting prozac poop-out) I feel lousy on the Well… read more
LeahMSWuofm
LeahMSWuofm
Clinical Social Worker
775 satisfied customers
I have been taking adderall for add for many years. I have
I have been taking adderall for add for many years. I have recently moved to central Texas, 6 hours away from my primary dr. and am unable to see him about getting back on the adderall. Is there any w… read more
LeahMSWuofm
LeahMSWuofm
Clinical Social Worker
775 satisfied customers
My son is 24. He has been treated for ADD and Depression.
My son is 24. He has been treated for ADD and Depression. However, from time to time he has psychotic episodes where he perceives espionage type events, where people and events are after him. My wife … read more
Dr. Kaushik
Dr. Kaushik
PSYCHIATRIST ( MD Psychiatry)
Doctoral Degree
204 satisfied customers
I was being treated for ADD at a doctors office because my
I was being treated for ADD at a doctors office because my insurance doesn't cover psychiatry. My doctor is now saying in order to keep treatment I need a diagnosis now from a psychiatrist. Any reccem… read more
Michael Salama
Michael Salama
MD
670 satisfied customers
I've been on Celexa for years, low dose 10mg. Mainly for ADD
I've been on Celexa for years, low dose 10mg. Mainly for ADD with very mild anxiety. 45 yr Male. Just think it's time to come off but looking for answers to why? Better concentration with normal negat… read more
Neuro Doctor
Neuro Doctor
Full Time Neurologist
Neurologist MD (USA Board Certified
2,534 satisfied customers
Disclaimer: Information in questions, answers, and other posts on this site ("Posts") comes from individual users, not JustAnswer; JustAnswer is not responsible for Posts. Posts are for general information, are not intended to substitute for informed professional advice (medical, legal, veterinary, financial, etc.), or to establish a professional-client relationship. The site and services are provided "as is" with no warranty or representations by JustAnswer regarding the qualifications of Experts. To see what credentials have been verified by a third-party service, please click on the "Verified" symbol in some Experts' profiles. JustAnswer is not intended or designed for EMERGENCY questions which should be directed immediately by telephone or in-person to qualified professionals.

Disclaimer: Information in questions, answers, and other posts on this site ("Posts") comes from individual users, not JustAnswer; JustAnswer is not responsible for Posts. Posts are for general information, are not intended to substitute for informed professional advice (medical, legal, veterinary, financial, etc.), or to establish a professional-client relationship. The site and services are provided "as is" with no warranty or representations by JustAnswer regarding the qualifications of Experts. To see what credentials have been verified by a third-party service, please click on the "Verified" symbol in some Experts' profiles. JustAnswer is not intended or designed for EMERGENCY questions which should be directed immediately by telephone or in-person to qualified professionals.

Show MoreShow Less

Ask Your Question

x