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LeahMSWuofm, Clinical Social Worker
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 645
Experience:  10 years post-MSW experience
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I am having doubts, fears and worry about my husband with is

Customer Question

I am having doubts, fears and worry about my husband with is all unfounded but I can't stop the thinking loop
JA: Have you seen a doctor about this yet? What medications are you taking?
Customer: I have not see anyone, not on any meds
JA: Anything else in your medical history you think the psychologist should know?
Customer: I have low thyroid and mid age menopause
JA: OK. Got it. I'm sending you to a secure page on JustAnswer so you can place the $5 fully-refundable deposit now. While you're filling out that form, I'll tell the Psychologist about your situation and then connect you two.
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  LeahMSWuofm replied 1 year ago.

Hello, my name is ***** ***** you for writing to us. Can you give me some additional details about what fears and worries you are having? Has this ever happened to you in the past, where you have found yourself stuck with thoughts in your head that you knew weren't true or valid but kept reoccurring?

I look forward to talking this over with you,


Customer: replied 1 year ago.
After 30 years of a wonderful marriage, it started out of no where. We had some stress in life biz, house, health but nothing we did go through before. We just started drifting but not a great deal. He started what I think is mid-life time and changing a bit. I got worried and googled, which was a mistake, because I got the idea that he might be cheating. He is not and never did but I can't get this out of my mind. We have talked and we are spending a lot of time together and doing different things and he is very supportive and trying very hard to work with me, but I am the one that has this big worry and fear and I look for things to prove I am right and have doubts. I just want to stop this negative thinking loop and relax and enjoy life again.
My doubts and thinking that he is or did cheat is unfounded, I have no proof, and everyone that knows us says they don't see the changes that I say.
I have never had this before.
Expert:  LeahMSWuofm replied 1 year ago.

Thank you for that additional information. google can be a best friend or a worst enemy due to the information but it is good you are trying to find answers and now reaching out for help. While I can't provide a diagnosis here, it sounds like you are suffering from something called Pure-OCD which is a form of obsessional compulsive disorder that involves unwanted or intrusive thoughts. The thoughts get easily stuck and the harder we try to not think about them or convince ourselves they are inaccurate, the harder it is to get rid of them.

Because this is impacting you greatly and you are reaching out for help here, my suggestion is you do two things. First, consider talking to your primary care doctor about a medication. Medications can be effective in lessening the obsessions and getting you back in control of your thoughts. SSRI medications (anti-depressants) are the first line medication tried to help this, and these medications are typically very well tolerated with low side effects and are safe for long-term and short term use. They can take a while to take effect however, so it is advised you seek out this solution sooner rather than later.

The other thing to do would be o seek counseling. OCD is best served by a treatment called Exposure and Response Prevention which takes you up close and personal with your unwanted thoughts and eventually "disempowers" it so it gets unstuck. You can look for counselors in your area who accept your insurance and specialize/treat OCD using this link.

Have faith that with the right support and help, you can overcome this pattern of thinking and get on with life! I hope this helps,