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LeahMSWuofm, Clinical Social Worker
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 587
Experience:  10 years post-MSW experience
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I'm 36 years old and I had intercourse first time 2

Customer Question

I'm 36 years old and I had intercourse for the first time 2 years ago at age 34. It is still painful for me. I have never experienced any pleasure from penetration at all, it still feels awful. In addition, within the past year I have totally lost my libido. Nothing turns me on anymore. I have no desire for anything sexual. I don't even think about it. I am seeing a naturopath doctor who says my estrogen levels are low, and has me taking an estrogen supplement. Doesn't seem to be helping much in the area of libido though. I also saw a gynocologist to make sure there was nothing wrong with me physically, and she said I was normal but that I have a small indroitus and may be experiencing some vaginismus. I am very worried because my fiance is very unsatisfied with our sex life, and I don't know what to do. We had some issues in our relationship last year and when we first had those issues was when I noticed my libido go away, but we have since resolved them so I don't understand why I still have no desire for sex. And I don't understand why intercourse still hurts. Any help?
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  LeahMSWuofm replied 1 year ago.
Hello and thank you for writing to us. I am sorry you are experiencing this issues - they must be frustrating for you and your fiance. The good news is that your situation could be substantially helped under the care of a certified sex therapist. They treat issues such as vaginismus as well as challenges with libido among nearly every other problem associated with our sexual health. They can/will also approach things from a relationship standpoint which may be of great benefit to you and your fiancé has you try and figure out a path forward. Would you consider consulting a sex therapist about these issues? I could help you locate some potential options, if it is something you are interested in. Unfortunately, it is still a relatively small professional field so there may not be many options depending on your location, but i can help show you where to look... -Leah
Expert:  LeahMSWuofm replied 1 year ago.
Hello: I just wanted to follow-up and see if you are considering the option of seeking out a sex therapist and if i can assist you any further? Please let me know f you have any follow-ups questions related to your concern. Sincerely, Leah