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Dr. Keane
Dr. Keane, Therapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 1378
Experience:  Clinical Psychology PhD, Licensed Professional Counselor with experience in marriage/family, teens and child psychology.
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Hey! So .. Something has been bothering me lately. I realize

Customer Question

Hey! So .. Something has been bothering me lately. I realize from the very first play I was in - I've declined from inviting people to see me perform in it. I grew up after that always lying or just telling my mom I didn't want my dad or stepdad at award ceremonies/graduations/sports competitions/etc.. Now as an adult when I have the opportunity to invite someone to an event (I'm an actress now) it takes me quite sometime to figure out who I should bring. When I go over the list - there are reasons why I don't want to invite anyone. Including my roommates, best friend and even boyfriend. My boyfriend recently brought this to my attention. I'll be in a play and not tell a single soul I'm in because I don't want people to go/waste their money/enjoy celebrating me/etc.. Why don't I want support from my friends and family when all they want is the opportunity to support and celebrate me?
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Dr. Z replied 1 year ago.
*This website DOES NOT constitute treatment and only provides information and advice in a Q&A format. For treatment (therapy and/or medications) you must go to a licensed professional in your area. Please note that anything said here is not private or confidential, as this is a public forum. Hello and thank you for using JustAnswer. I cannot tell you specifically why you do not want the people closest to you to go to your plays as I have never assessed you face to face and to determine the exact reason would take in depth therapy to help understand your past and current psyche. Now with that being said I can speculate that possibly you feel like you will let them down if you do not perform as well as you want. Or the presence of your friends and family can make you feel more anxious because you know they are specifically watching you and you may negatively think they will be critiquing you...this is an automatic negative thought where we jump to the "worst case scenario" and this can reinforce your anxiety/nervousness. Another possibility is that you may be extremely humble to a point where you do not want to be the center of attention or celebrated by your friends because you feel it would be boasting or bragging, when in fact it is not.

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