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Dr. Keane
Dr. Keane, Therapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 1379
Experience:  Clinical Psychology PhD, Licensed Professional Counselor with experience in marriage/family, teens and child psychology.
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This story is my story. I need help to know if this was rape

Customer Question

This story is my story. I need help to know if this was rape or regret, coercion or consensual. Heres the scenario.
A supervisor has been emotionally abusing an employee to the point she cannot trust any of the workers to report emotional abuse to. He then sexts her and for the sake of keeping her job she sexts him back. Then the supervisor asks an employee whom he has been sexting multiple times for sex. The employee says no. Then later after the supervisor keeps asking for sex the employee gives mixed symbols thinking that will make him tired of asking and leave her alone.
Eventually he tries to force her to have sex via doggy position at the work. She doesn't permit him by squeezing her butt cheeks when he tries to insert.
He tells her, "what are you doing?"
And he stops and tells her, "The problem with you is that you're afraid. Dont be afraid."
The employee then tells the supervisor, "No, its because I dont want to have sex at work."
Eventually the employee was invited to go to his apartment and the employee was put in a misdionary position.
The supervisor told the employee, "Do you want the dick?"
The employee then says, "No I need to go. My parents are waiting for me."
Trying to get up. The supervisor stuck his finger in her and not realizing it was digital sex at first he asked, "Do you like that?" And she knods in approval. The employee is starting to feel hurt and she tells him to stop. He then stops. The supervisor then gets off the employee.
The supervisor then says "We are never having sex are we?" The employee then attempts to leave. The supervisor grabs the employee with both arms. The employee pulled away and left anyway.
The supervisor then makes a huge scene at work saying, "My dick hurts because of you! Because you didnt have sex with me."
And continues to guilt her.
The employee then replied, "You hurt me when you stuck your finger in me without my permission. So I guess we are even. Ha!"
The Supervisor says, "Ok, we'll go with that then.
The supervisor asks her to strip for him and she does without complaint to see if he would calm down.
The supervisor has touched this employee multiple times too. The employee doesnt want to be touched yet allows him to touch and even moans in approval to see if he would stop
asking for sex.
The supervisor keeps asking for sex and the employee keeps sending mixed signals in hope that he would give up. She even makes excuses why she doesnt want to have sex.
Eventually the last time he asks the employee to go to the pantry. The employee gives up, accepts the situation, and obeys and whem she got there he pulls her pants down and puts her in the doggy position. When she gets up he gently nudges her down and says, "No,we are doing this no matter what." She obeys and he then has sex with her vaginally. She is in pain, yet she moans so she doesnt look like a fool.she thinks a variety of thoughts of not being able to believe shes not a virgin, thinking if she will get stds, thinking if she will get pregnant and even thinking, "God, you didnt gimme my bf back so I am loosing my virginity cuz of it."
Then the supervisor stuck his penis in her anus. She then cried, "What are you doing?! Thats my ass."
He then said, "No its not. Thats your vagina."
It hurt a lot. He then shortly put his penis back into my vagina and then I said
"There thats right." It hurt a lot.
Eventually he finished up and got up smirked at me and said, "youll get better." And walks away. I get back to my work shift being the only employee in the building during the night shift kids sleeping just in a shock and in pain.
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Dr. Z replied 1 year ago.

*This website DOES NOT constitute treatment and only provides information and advice in a Q&A format. For treatment (therapy and/or medications) you must go to a licensed professional in your area. Please note that anything said here is not private or confidential, as this is a public forum.

Hello and thank you for using JustAnswer. What you described is considered rape and also sexual harassment given that this individual was your supervisor and intimidated you into sexual acts in this way. From a psychological point of view though this was definitely akin to rape given the level of harassment, force, intimidation, and manipulation even when you said no multiple times. I am not a lawyer, so I cannot tell you if this meets your state's definition of rape from a legal perspective, but it does meet the psychological definition of rape given your description. I am very sorry that this happened to you and I would highly recommend that you leave this job, contact human resources, contact the police, hire your own lawyer, and/or seek out a psychologist/therapist that specializes in treatment of rape and sexual assault to help you heal and move forward.

Expert:  Dr. Z replied 1 year ago.

Please let me know if you have any other questions or concerns as I would be happy to continue assisting you regarding this issue