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abray1115, Doctor
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 10341
Experience:  Primary care with particular care and experience in managing common psychiatric problems.
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In 2011, my best friend that I considered a sister betrayed

Customer Question

In 2011, my best friend that I considered a sister betrayed me. I do not have a relationship with my mother. This friendship was filling a void in my life and we were really close, traveled together etc. We worked together as well. In October 2014, I told
her that I missed our friendship everyday. To my surprise, she said that she did too and added can we work on it. Well, I am the only one working on it. I have asked her to go to lunch with me at least three times or even dinner. nothing. she calls me to vent
about work. a little personal talk. My questions: when I talked to her in October, she immediately unblocked me and my daughter from facebook. Why did me approaching her prod this action? I am now hurting because she has not done anything to work on our friendship.
It has been always me. Yesterday was my birthday and she did not even remember. Around 10pm at night she told me Happy Birthday on facebook. Everyone has told me to move on.. don't know how.. I hurt inside and it bothers me....
Submitted: 2 years ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  abray1115 replied 2 years ago.


I would advise that you do your best to work on the friendship in small steps. Talk first about less personal issues . It sounds that MAYBE she feels a different level of friendship and not as close as you do to her. It sounds that you feel toward her as a SISTER but she probably feeels more of a casual friendship.

It is common in friendships or other relationships that there may be different level of feelings of person A and person B..

So I suspect that she may wish for friendship but may feel smothered if you are wanting to be much closer.

I have no crytal ball to your situation but from the sound of your question this would be my speculation. If she wished you a HAPPY BIRTHDAY then she is not hostile toward you...

perhaps something was said that offended her in some way in the past could have been a third party rumor ...several possibilities...

I think it sensible for you to work on the friendship but not push too hard...

I hope that this is helpful for you! Let me know if you have further questions or discussion.I will be happy to get back with you!

If my answers have been helpful and to your satisfaction then please remember to leave positive feedback.Thank you and Best Regards!

Anthony Bray MD

Expert:  abray1115 replied 2 years ago.

I will be happy to discuss further if that may be helpful.

Best Regards!

Anthony Bray MD