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Dr. Z
Dr. Z, Psychologist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 10643
Experience:  Psy.D. in Clinical Forensic Psychology with a background in treating severe mental illnesses.
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My daughter is 33 years old and has been married uears.

Customer Question

My daughter is 33 years old and has been married for 8 uears. She is pregnant for the first time.
She has a stressful job and signed up for classes next month.
She always picking an argument with me twisting everything i say or do.
My daughter is now 10 weeks in her pregnancy and will tell me about her unpredictable sickness. I try to advise her from crackers, peppermint,ginger,smelling lemons, eating unseasoned foods.
I tell her about my pregnancys in the past. I had 5 children.
She will i said something i didn't say. I tole i was sick with my first child and was not much sick with the others. She clams i said was told her i was never and argues the point.
She told me she was afraid of losing the child and read things about miscarriages. Someone she new had a baby that died recently a month after it was born.
She said she was afraid to get excited and afraid to have feelings for her unborn child.
I tried to comfort her telling her it is ok to love her unborn child. The umborn needs to know it is loved.
Well my daughter became angry and accused me of telling her that she was not a good mother and that i told her she did not love her child. She said i told her she was a bad mother.
I don't know what to do, i am worried she is taking on too much working a new job she doesn't like. They just moved to a new location because her husband's job,and she signed up for classes starting next monthi live in the US and she.lives in Australia.
What am i to do, i am worried about her emotional state effecting my grand child.
Submitted: 2 years ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Dr. Z replied 2 years ago.
*This website DOES NOT constitute treatment and only provides information and advice. For treatment (therapy and/or medications) you must go to a licensed professional in your area. Please note that anything said here is not private or confidential, as this is a public forum.
Hello, I am so sorry that your daughter is experiencing these symptoms and is under this much stress, I can understand how distressing this can be for her and for you as well. Because your daughter is experiencing these high levels of stress, you should encourage her to try to go to counseling sessions with a psychologist, or perhaps group classes for mothers to be, so that she has some level of support outside of just you and her husband. While she may not agree to seek out therapy, you should try to tell her that therapy is just meant to be supportive and allows for her an environment to vent and de-stress. In addition, you can tell her that therapy will be also be a good place to learn coping techniques so that she can manage her overall stress better. If she is still hesitant to go, you should try to contact her husband directly and voice your concerns to him and how therapy would be a good option for her. In addition, her husband can also try to encourage her to reduce some of her workload knowing that she is experiencing these symptoms as well.
You can definitely still talk to her and allow her to vent with you over the phone, email, video-chat, etc…but continue to mention to her that there are resources available she can use (e.g. therapy) for support. Right now your daughter is having recurrent worries about her pregnancy which just causes more and more stress, so she will need to get that extra support to help herself. Remember you are just her mother, and while you love and care for her greatly you are not her therapist, so this is why trying to involve and push her towards that direction of treatment will be best way for her to get the help that she needs.
I hope this answers your questions and gives you some guidance on this issue. I wish your daughter all the best and I hope her overall stress lessens very soon and I wish your entire family all the best.
My goal is to provide you with excellent service, so if you ever have any further questions or concerns please do not hesitate to contact me at anytime. If I answered your question satisfactorily I would very much appreciate if you could rate my performance in helping you so that I can get credit for this question. Thank you very much