Hi it's rannia again, I just sent a msg regarding my sexual abuse ruining my marriage. I also wanted to add
, when I was 15 my father forced me to chat to my 1st cousin, who I did
not find attraction to at all. He was 11 yrs older than me and by 16 yrs
old I was married overseas to my cousin and only my grandmother and 6yr old sister were with me so I had no say in the matter cause my father said to me' you have to marry him cause we can't tell every guy asking for your hand about what happen to you. But
apparently my father told my cousin what happen and he still wanted to marry me. I never wanted it from the beginning and told my cousin that but I was scared and shy, then he started crying and begging me to marry him and I just kept remembering my father.
Then when he arrived to Australia I told him again and my father no one would listen. Then we had the Australian wedding when I was 18. I was always unhappy and angry with my dad and everything and hated anyone touching me in any way. After I was married at
18 we had 4 kids and the was always problems and still is today , I feel lost and still so much anger and resentment towards my father for not listeningto me and now I've got 4 kids ages 10 , 8, 5, 3 and a half ,my 5yr old and 3 and a half old have autisum
spectrum disorder. I'm 29 yrs old and still hate my husband touching me every time and I don't know what to do with my life and I feel selfish to break up my family but I'm drowning too it's upsetting and depressing and no one understands how I feel inside
and at the moment I'm roll playing just to get by everyday I'm soooo confused wondering if I should stay for the kids or end it for good and have my kids hate me.