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Mental health hotline I have been feeling upset, troubled

hello mental health hotline I have...
hello mental health hotline
I have been feeling upset, troubled all day
and I can't shake off this awful feeling.
it all began this morning when I was dragged out of bed by my parent,
when i just wanted to continue sleeping. she got upset when i accidently spilled a beverage and started raging and shouting out of control, she said alot of hurtful resentful things. when she left to go do an errand I was still upset about it all day
my emotions are a twisted trainwreck and i can't calm down.
on top of that she continually will tell me offensive things without even apologizing.
its difficult to talk to someone who relentlessly does that.
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Answered in 1 minute by:
10/18/2013
Dr. Z
Dr. Z, Psychologist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 10,643
Experience: Psy.D. in Clinical Forensic Psychology with a background in treating severe mental illnesses.
Verified
Dr. Z :

Hello

Dr. Z :

I believe I can help you with your concern

Dr. Z :

I am so sorry that your parent exhibited this behavior towards you, I can imagine how distressing that must have been for you

Dr. Z :

May I ask, how long has this parent being behaving this way towards you?

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

since high school

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

or rather this behavior has intensified since then

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

its gotten worse over the years

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

I also notice that she tries to be controlling

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

and manipulative

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

seems to get an enjoyment from putting me down and saying all the things

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

that get in me in tears in seconds

Dr. Z :

May I ask does she have any low self-esteem at all or has she been under incredible stress?

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

she has been under stress for a long time

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

and she puts herself through more

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

by giving advice to her friends

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

she just became the leader of a prayer group

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

and she goes to a club

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

where people do public speeches

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

she has just been diagnosed with depression

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

also

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

but she manages to make me miserable also

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

she has been seeing outside professional help

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

but I honestly see no improvement

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

its difficult trying to communicate with her

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

its frustrating and I lose all patience

Dr. Z :

That is why I asked about the low self-esteem and stress, most likely her depression causes the low self-esteem and she seeks to put you down to make her feel better, which does not last very long and then she tries to seek validation by doing so much with increases her stress and this causes her more issues.

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

I have tried reasoning and apologizing

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

what bothers me

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

is when I try to have a normal conversation with her

Dr. Z :

I can understand why you are frustrated and I do not blame you. I think she needs a better therapists if it is not helping with her symptoms and possibly the use of an anti-depressant.

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

its like she doesnt care and she will even say

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

that she doesnt care what is it is I have to say

Dr. Z :

Can you go to a psychological therapy session with her and voice your concerns to her therapist?

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

I can find out where it is and go there alone and speak with the therapist

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

its a local agency and they have been treating my mom free of charge

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

but i have seen no changes

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

or a lift in her spirits

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

nearly every night I hear her crying

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i have sincerely ***** ***** in with a friend

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i cant stand it anymore

Dr. Z :

No you actually cannot go alone and speak to the therapist because of medical privacy laws, but I was wondering if you can request a joint session with the therapist because your mom may not be realizing that she is acting this way and I think her therapist would need to know in order to help her

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

oh I see I will try to ask, i dunno how my mom will react or if she will approve

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

that I come along to the therapy

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

but I will insist anyway so I know what is going on

Dr. Z :

I understand, but it may be worth a try, although I do think that moving out would be best for your psyche as you cannot take this emotional and verbal abuse much longer.

Dr. Z :

Her depression can cause irritability which is what you are seeing

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

I have put up with it when it all began in high school

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

im a college graduate now

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i work parttime and thankfully i have my own car

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i only have peace of mind when im away from home

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

or when my mom is not home

Dr. Z :

Well here is a technique that you can use to vent your frustration in a more assertive and appropriate manner towards your mother. It may not make a difference with her, but at least you will get a chance to vent and express your anger/frustration

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

or when Im out with friends

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

thank you

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

however there is another problem that concerns me

Dr. Z :

I understand, it probably may be time to at least think about and plan on moving out because this abuse is getting too much

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

lately ive noticed my mom gets offended because of my friends

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

she even told they are worthless

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

she has an unrealistic standard for who I can befreiend

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

its hurt my social life considerable

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

I have gone weeks without visitng my friends

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

much less calling them

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

and when i am talking to them or when my mom knows that I am socializing with them

Dr. Z :

I am so sorry to hear this

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

she criticizes me for seeing them

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

its because of this town we live in

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

we onced owned a house

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

but we had to move into temporary residences

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

my mom and i live in a one bedroom one bathroom house

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

she sleeps in the living room

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

while i stay in the one room

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

the house is small

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

so its the perfect set up for volatile things to occur

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i try to leave this small place whenever i get the chance

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

my mom has deeply scarred my emotions

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i honestly dont know what to make of reality

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

or what I am supposed to feel

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i dont even feel remotely alive

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i feel like im moving a through a mirage

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

days back i went to a party and on my way over there

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i was on this train

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

the people on the train did not feel real to me

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

they all seemed like illusions

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

its almost like im disconnected from the world

Dr. Z :

Well it sounds like you are in a traumatic situation and constantly exposed to this situation. This sounds like you are going through Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD).

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

the sad part is

Dr. Z :

These are all classic symptoms of PTSD. The first thing you have to do is escape the situation, which means moving out

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

thats awful

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

anyway that night when i went to the party,

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i saw all sorts of people, but I had no courage to go and mingle with them

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

no confidence

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

all i did was wander around and dance the night away

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

in the past, my mom would accompany me

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

but her presence takes away from the experience.

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

she would always insist on coming

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i would even go so far as to ditch her

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

and she would still catch up

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

luckily my friends and I managed to go to alot of places on our own

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

now that I have a car finally

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i can go wherever i wish

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

so long as I text my parent where I am

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i feel like my mom suffocates me though

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

with her constant chaperoning

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

and all that

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

ive come to resent her for it

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

unfortunately

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i see my friends and there parents

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

and some of them

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

dont seem to care what their kids are doing

Dr. Z :

And well she is lonely, that is a part of the depression, but when she is with you she emotionally and verbally abuses you too. It sounds like your mom is very attached too you and may have attachment issues. Attachment issues, depression, anxiety, anger, and mood swings are all symptoms of a disorder called Borderline Personality Disorder, which may be what your mother has

Dr. Z :

It is a very severe disorder and requires a special type of therapy to treat it

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

yeah I notice that my mother seems more composed and so unlike herself

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

when she is with friends or doing a public speech

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

what I find disturbing is that

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

she seems open

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

to resolving other peoples problems and issue

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

rather than hours

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

*ours

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

she is great at giving advice

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

from what Ive heard her say on the phone to her friends

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

it upsets me that she takes the time to help her friends with their problems

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

and whenever I try to bring up a concern or problem i have

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

she says she doesnt want to listen

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

or accuses me that i am bringing my problems home with me (well that is what she says)

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

she will even blame me and say that its my fault

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

my mom is a religious lady

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

but all the offensive things she has ever said to me were all completely ungodly

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

even for a christian woman

Dr. Z :

I am sorry that you are being treated in this way by your mother, but it will not get better for her unless she receives the right treatment or if she gains insight that she is treating you in this way, which so far she has no insight on this

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

the horrible thing about it is that she always justifies

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

what she says

Dr. Z :

You are right that she is treating you in an un-Christ***** *****ke way, but you cannot control her behavior, you can only control your actions and behavior. You can try going to a therapy session with her and contribute, but I really think that you have to move out for the sake of your own mental health

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

now that you have told me that i have ptsd

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

things make much more sense

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i have been waking in the middle of the night

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

in cold sweets

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

*sweats

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

with my heart pounding

Dr. Z :

Well PTSD can be treated very successfully and most likely it is a response to your mother's emotional and verbal abuse towards you.

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

in the past

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

lately not so much

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i cant even remember any of the nightmares

Dr. Z :

Well I would like to recommend some good books that can help you with your symptoms

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i considered seeking group therapy and outside help

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

yes please

Dr. Z :

And also this book may help you understand your mother's behavior more too

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

still this all very surprising and horrifying for me

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

there are so many unresolved

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

things that bothers me about my mom

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

my mom is always so unpredictable

Dr. Z :

I am so sorry to hear that, maybe you joining her therapy sessions can be a regular thing to help resolve those things that bother you

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

she can be happy for one moment

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

then the next she becomes volatile like a raging volcano

Dr. Z :

That is classic BPD right there

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

her emotions change

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

so she is also bi polar

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

she doesnt even take medication for that.

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

that is why i am so upset with that agency she goes to

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

they seem to have perpetuated the problem

Dr. Z :

No Borderline Personality Disorder is BPD

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

from what it was before

Dr. Z :

Her moods change too rapidly for it to be Bipolar Disorder

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

oh

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

woops

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

my friend said he would help me

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

and would let me stay with him

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

but since he has to pay for housing

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i need to help out by paying 400 a month

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

however my retail job pays me 200- 300 every two weeks

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

sometimes lower than I would like

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

as additional info

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

my mom took my credit card and payed the house rent for one month

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i have been harrased by the bank collectors because of her

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i currently owe about 1000

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

but luckily i had spoken with a banker and i explained what my mom did without my knowlegde

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

they said they would drop it to 600

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i have considered taking legal action

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

but i dunno what the repercussions will be

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

if i do that

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

im scared that if i stay any longer

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

my mom will hurt my credit

Dr. Z :

I am sorry that your mom did this, the stealing your credit card and making these purchases without your knowledge is associated with BPD too. If you do take legal action you will have to do so after you move out, but first I suggest finding a way to move out because it is obvious that it is not healthy for you to live there

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i even went to so far as to confront her about it

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

my biggest issue with moving out

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

is that my job is faraway from my friends house

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i have tried transfering to a closer branch

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

but my manager is not letting me do that

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

giving me different excuses each time

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i found out our staff is limited

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i dunno if I should go to the head manager

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

and tell her why its urgent that I transfer

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

and if she will accept my petition

Dr. Z :

I am sorry, I can imagine that the job situation is tough out there and makes your choices limited, but I am just letting you know that you will not get better until you escape her abuse.

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i guess i will have to either resign or secure another job before i do

Dr. Z :

I think that may be best, ***** ***** not to delay or at least try to spend as little time in that house with your mom

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i actually did consider

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

running away with my car

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

and heading to my friends house

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

at night

Dr. Z :

Well do not do anything impulsive, make a plan that makes sense and that you would not be sacrificing too much financially

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

my mom has been saying that she wants me to leave and she even threatens to kick me out

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

but she never does

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

is that part of her personality disorder?

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

I dont want my mother to know I am moving out

Dr. Z :

Yes it is very much a part of BPD, the attachment issues and the "I hate you, I love you" back and forth

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i notice she always tries to alter or change my mind

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

on things

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

with success

Dr. Z :

Well try not to let her manipulate you like that now that you are cognizant of it

Dr. Z :

Just plan to move out by yourself and then one day when she is not there just move out

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

also i have one last problem

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i put up with her abuse

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

because

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

of my pets

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

my pet cat and dog

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i love those two very much

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

my mom threatened to put them up for adoption if i tried to run away or leave

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

my friend has her pet cat and i dunno if mine will get along with hers

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

if i cant bring my dog

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i will leave him with my mother

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

so he keeps her company

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

but i want my cat with me

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i also considered

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

visiting my mother after i move out

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

so there is no ill will between us

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

but based on what youve just told me

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

is that even a good course of action?

Dr. Z :

I would only visit her if it was in a public place for lunch, dinner, or coffee for example. That way the public space may quell her abuse towards you

Dr. Z :

Now with the animals, you can try to bring your cat with you that is a good idea and if you truly think that she will not put the dog up for adoption then I guess you can leave the dog with her

Dr. Z :

Or you can give the dog to a friend that will take care of him/her

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

the bizarre thing about this is that things will seem alright for days on end

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

then an incident like this morning will just occur

Dr. Z :

And they will continue to occur in an unpredictable fashion, that is what happens with individuals that have a diagnosis of BPD.

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i can see if my godparents can take care of my dog

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

and since my friend loves cats i guess he wont mind

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

so long as we keep our cats apart

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

just in case

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

they dont get along

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

sometimes though when my mom do go to a public place

Dr. Z :

That is true, you can also try bringing your cat over once or twice as a test run to see if they get along

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

and I*

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

and i do just about anything to set her off

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

she will even try putting me down in public

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

so far she has done that 3 times

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

once when i was 11

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

at a themepark

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

2nd time in front of my friends

Dr. Z :

Well if she does that, then just get up and leave and tell her when she starts treating you like an adult you will meet her again

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i feel really bad talking of my mother in this way

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

but sincerely ***** ***** all the negative things that have taken place

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

on both our accounts

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

has affected my outlook towards friendships

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

and trying to be sociable

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

my confidence has been battered

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i havent even bothered entering the dating scene

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i felt like wasnt worthy

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

subconsciously

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

my mom even went to so far as to discourage me from seeing certain friends

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

when i was 11 and i came home from school

Dr. Z :

I understand and this is why this living situation is not healthy for you and you should leave for you

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

my mom told me out of the blue

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

that all my friends every single one of theme

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

did not care about me

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

and that they dont love me

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

like i love and care about them

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i dunno if she told me that to isolate me

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

or to keep me from getting hurt

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

but it has made me more distrustful of people

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

since then

Dr. Z :

She told you that to bring you down and isolate you, remember she has attachment issues

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

when i look back on it

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i resent her for it

Dr. Z :

You need to escape this situation before it gets worse for you

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i spent all of 6th grade

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

friendless

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

based on what she said

Dr. Z :

Well you cannot change the past, you can only change your present so try to focus on the here and now

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

it wasnt until 7th grade that I finally made more friends to make up for it

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i just explaining the extent of the damage she has done

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

and I realize now

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

that what she did was purely

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

wether intentional or not

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

to be completely evil

Dr. Z :

I know it was and I am sorry you had to experience this, but now you have a plan on how to escape this and live your life the way you want to

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i will have to take a chance and leave my dog with my mom until i find someone who is willing to take care of him

Dr. Z :

I think that is a good plan

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i plan to leave when she isnt home

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

and try to find a stable retail job to help me pay rent

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

or i can just keep my old job and tell my friend if he is ok with it

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

until i can find a higher paying job

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

my old plan was to stay until i had saved up enough money

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

but in this case

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i cant really stay if I want to get better

Dr. Z :

I understand, and it may be tough for a little while, but the sooner you can leave the better for your psychological health

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

and lead a happier life

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

im going to tell my friend about it tommorrow over the phone when my mom isnt there

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

and see if he and i can figure out a date for when i can leave and move in

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

im worried my friend will change his mind

Dr. Z :

I think that is a good plan for you

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i have had difficulty saying it to him out in the open that iwant to move in with him

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

im worried he will change his mind

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

he said at the beginning that he would gladly let me stay at his place

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

the reason why i am so apprehensive about

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

asking directly

Dr. Z :

Well if he does than you will have to come up with a good backup plan, but do not worry about that unless it happens.

Dr. Z :

Ask him first and then take it from there

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i used to go to my godparents for help whenever my mom was too much

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

when i look back on it

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

though they never seemed to believe me

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

or why it was urgent for me to leave home

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

they even offered to let me stay with them once

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

but when i finally did have the courage to run awau

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

they said i couldnt stay

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

unless i had a car

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

it made me lose all faith in people altogether

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i just want my friend to keep his promise

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

im hellbent to leave

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i dont want what happened with my godparents to repeat again with my friend

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

but i will discuss with him tomorrow

Dr. Z :

Well trust your friend and ask him tomorrow, you cannot think negatively about this.

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

thank you for your time and patience

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i will talk to him about this

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

and hope for the best

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i appreciate all the insight

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

and based on what youve said

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

now i can finally make sense of it all

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

but once i move out? i still want to seek outside help

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

but im worried i wont be able to afford it

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

but based on what i have told you

Dr. Z :

Well try the books I gave you, they are very helpful and will provide you with techniques for treatment

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

to what extent do i need the the treatment though?

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

will these books help me to treat it myself?

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

entirely?

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

or will i need intensified help?

Dr. Z :

The books should give you some guidance and escaping the situation will help too. If after 2-3 months of not living there and you still feel bad then you may need more extensive treatment, but right now lets use the books to help you as that is a more affordable route

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

alright i will try the books

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

and go from there

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

based on the urgency

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i will have to leave sooner than planned

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

it was wrong for me to put up with it

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

and delay moving out

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i realize it not worth waiting

Dr. Z :

I wish you the best of luck and I truly hope that you feel better soon and that your mom gets the treatment that she needs. My goal is to provide you with excellent service, so if you ever have any further questions or concerns please do not hesitate to contact me at anytime.

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

could you please resend me the links on ptsd

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

before we go?

Dr. Z :

When you finish rating me, this chat will be sent as a link to your email, if it has not already, so you can always use it for future reference. In addition, this chat will be saved in your JA account under My Questions so you can always go back to it when you need to


Dr. Z :

So all the links should still be there for you

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

thank you for your help, it all makes so much more sense now.

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

i will do as you advised

JACUSTOMER-ouabe8ww- :

goodnight and thanks again

Dr. Z
Dr. Z, Psychologist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 10,643
Experience: Psy.D. in Clinical Forensic Psychology with a background in treating severe mental illnesses.
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Dr. Z
Dr. Z, Psychologist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 10,643
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Experience: Psy.D. in Clinical Forensic Psychology with a background in treating severe mental illnesses.

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