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RealSupport, Psychotherapist
Category: Mental Health
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Experience:  MHT-MHRS-MS-MA Integral Psychotherapist & Life Coach
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I am a 35 yr old male from nz on holiday in malaysia. I am

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Hi there. I am a 35 yr old male from nz on holiday in malaysia. I am in constant fear for having drugs planted, being an unwitting mule or police being corrupt. It is a constant on my mind mentally and I can tell its affecting my partner. I constantly check bags and I travel light, but my thoughts overwhelm me to over think everything to the point of checking the seams of my t shirts for hidden cocaine, to thinking my shoes what if they have drugs in them and they somehow got onto the shelves of the shoe shop. I know this is irrational but my fears of being the next schapelle Corby terrifies me. It's so bad that I don't currently wear anything in material I can't see through to ensure there are no powders I can't see. Thanks for listening to my insanity. Nathan y
Oh I've even thought of the idea of drilling my shoes to ensure there aren't drugs that's how crazy my thoughts are. . .
Rafael M.T.Therapist :

Hello, I am Rafael. Thanks for asking your question - I'm here to support you. (Information posted here is not private or confidential but public).

Rafael M.T.Therapist :

I am very sorry to know about this situation that seems to be very overwhelming.

Rafael M.T.Therapist :

What you described seems to show that you are suffering or very intense anxiety, where your mind creates these obsessive ideation about the possibilities of being victimized and going through a life nightmare of being incriminated and not having the means to protect yourself from such abuse at a foreign country. Most times people could experience these symptoms and develop anxiety disorders from OCD - obsessive compulsive disorder- to phobias, panic disorders and many other conditions, if having a predisposition to suffer of those mental disorders and triggered by concrete life stressors, challenges or problems.

Rafael M.T.Therapist :

These stressors - factors could have a ground on reality or be fueled by fears from past traumas, concerns or painful situations the person experienced himself or witnessed, whether directly or heard about via any media source. The core of it is the person's psyque feeling powerfully impacted by such events, becoming more vulnerable and sensitive to any potential real life situation where he could find himself undergoing a similar nightmare.

Rafael M.T.Therapist :

You do acknowledge these fears and ideation are irrational, excessive but find yourself unable to control them, since it is not your conscious mind what produces them, but they come from a more subconscious level, using your emotions and fears to perpetuate themselves.

Rafael M.T.Therapist :

If you allow these fears to command your behavior, going from these obsessions to compulsive behavior, trying to avoid or reduce their intensity, you would end up enabling the obsessions-fear even more, what would empower the vicious circle of obsession-compulsion. This is why this disorder could be truly tough and challenging, since it appears like if you follow your fears, you would get relief, but in reality you would only worsen the disorder, this is why you need to literally acknowledge the symptoms as a real disorder, confront the distortions they present, and not follow the compulsive behaviors to compensate the anxiety for you not to get more trapped into it.

Rafael M.T.Therapist :

Does it make sense?

Customer: It does make perfect sense, it is just super hard as the voice in the back of my mind says what if what if what if there are drugs in my shoes etc
Customer: forumset forums are my worst nightmare, I can see I'm not alone in my fears and it seems we all feed off each other
Customer: yesother yes I do follow my fears like you mentioned. I constantly have to appease my irrational thoughts by doing stupid things. And the fear and idea that if I did have something planted on me the authorities show no mercy and if you have them on you chances are high you are going to jail or worse death as mules are guilty and very rarely can you prove innocence. I know people say most mules are guilty of bring ignorant or plain guilty however there are a few cases where they were proven by some miracle innocent.
Rafael M.T.Therapist :

Yes, your experience is tough, you truly feel the way you describe here, but at the same time you know that these overwhelming fears are irrational and extreme, and that's why you need to confront them with reality. This is not an easy process at all, but be sure that your fears would not change your objective reality, but can continue to undermine your mental, emotional health, functioning and relationships, and that's why you need to be this proactive about it getting all the support you can to better cope with it until you get necessary profesisonal psychological support.

Rafael M.T.Therapist :

Your partner should support you focusing on actions that could truly help you to be and fell better but please do not continue to follow the obsession with compulsive behavior, since that would only worsen the symptoms. If these symptoms continue to be these overwhelming, making it unbearable to enjoy your time there, then you would have to reassess your priorities and consider going back home earlier than planned in order to get necessary professional psychological support, since it is obvious the concrete location is the core source of your fears triggering all these symptoms. Once you get back home, you would feel relieved but do not delay getting psychotherapy in order to process what happened and totally rehabilitate from it, once the core of this situation is your hyper sensitivity and predisposition to develop anxiety disorders, thus you need to work on improving your coping skills, resilience, assertiveness and anxiety management, that way you would not find yourself suffering of this nor of any other similar condition this overwhelmingly.

Customer: Thanks again. It's like everything I do is geared to trying to protect me if I'm the unlucky scape goat of a corrupt police or immigration officer looking at a promotion and just wants a high profile score etc. my thoughts go over and over up and down from rational to irrational and it's scarey for sure
Rafael M.T.Therapist :

You bet it is, and that's why you need to confront them with concrete reality check supported by your partner, refocusing on healthy and proactive behaviors instead of enabling the obsessive thoughts even more. Please, before anything, remind yourself that this is a mental health disorder and not reality, that you need to be unconditionally patient, gentle, understanding, compassionate and suportive with yourself, trusting your partner and getting the professional support you need to get your tranquility and well-being back. This is not an easy process at all, but it is possible, necessary and absolutely worthy.

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