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He is walking away with leaving me with all responsibility

of the mortgage ect...
He is walking away with leaving me with all responsibility of the mortgage ect
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Answered in 1 hour by:
5/22/2013
Elliott, LPCC, NCC
Elliott, LPCC, NCC, Psychotherapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 7,664
Experience: 35 years of experience as a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, National Certified Counselor and a college professor.
Verified
Elliott, LPCC, NCC : Seeking expert counseling is a sign of strength. A personal relationship with a caring professional is proven clinically effective.
Elliott, LPCC, NCC : Dear friend,
Elliott, LPCC, NCC : I believe that I can help.
Elliott, LPCC, NCC : Perhaps this is just a short-lived threat.
Elliott, LPCC, NCC : You have not given the details of why this has happened and what you mean by a 16 year old impacting the decision. Can you explain?
Elliott, LPCC, NCC : There may be something more to this and I would like to further discuss this with you to help you find understanding and possible a solution.
Elliott, LPCC, NCC : Since you are not online now, I shall save this chat so that you can come back to it and fill in a lot more detail so that I have a basis on which to guide you.
Elliott, LPCC, NCC : You can put in your responses whether I am available at the moment or not, and I will get back to you.
Elliott, LPCC, NCC : Warm regards,
Elliott, LPCC, NCC : Elliott, MAE, LPCC, NCC, CCMHC
Customer: Ok. Thank you. The frustration on my part has been building up since he has been staying out until 6:00 in the morning. The worst was when he came home at 10:30 on a Sunday. He said he was going out at midnight and wen to the casino. prior to him leaving he told me he was unhappy and thinking about leaving. I informed him to why wait and with his drinking and gambling i am equally tired. He left to a hotel and took my step dtr with. They have been in a hotel for 6 days and she has been with him. She has an alcoholic mother as well. I believe she is encouraging him to leave to California. This way she has Dad to herself and with his erratic behavior I think he is agreeing. I think certainly mentally there is more. He doe have an anxiety disorder and takes Clonapin.
Customer: Running off to California is not going assist in resolving any matters. I do think he is spriraling downward with the gambling and alcohol
Elliott, LPCC, NCC : Dear friend,
Elliott, LPCC, NCC : I believe that your partner has a lot more than anxiety. This kind of reckless behavior including the gambling and drinking and running off, is indicative of someone who might have Bipolar Disorder.
Elliott, LPCC, NCC : You may not want to get back with him if he is going to continue to be this way.
Elliott, LPCC, NCC : If he does have bipolar disorder he may show other signs of mania, one of the two poles of bipolar disorder (the other one being depression).
Elliott, LPCC, NCC : These are the official psychiatric criteria for mania from the DSM-IV manual:
Elliott, LPCC, NCC : Mania DSM-IVA) A distinct period of abnormally and persistently elevated, expansive or irritable mood, lasting at least 1 week (or any duration if hospitalization is necessary)B) During the period of mood disturbance, three (or more) of the following symptoms have persisted (four if the mood is only irritable) and have been present to a significant degree:1) inflated self-esteem or grandiosity2) decreased need for sleep (e.g., feels rested after only 3 hours of sleep)3) more talkative than usual or pressure to keep talking4) flight of ideas or subjective experience that thoughts are racing5) distractibility (i.e., attention too easily drawn to unimportant or irrelevant external stimuli)6) increase in goal-directed activity (at work, at school, or sexually) or psychomotor agitation7) excessive involvement in pleasurable activities that have a high potential for painful consequences (e.g., engaging in unrestrained buying sprees, sexual indiscretions, or foolish business investments)C) The symptoms do not meet criteria for a Mixed EpisodeD) The mood disturbance is sufficiently severe to cause marked impairment in occupational functioning or in usual social activities or relationships with others, or to necessitate hospitalization to prevent harm to self or others, or there are psychotic features.E) The symptoms are not due to the direct physiological effects of a substance or a general medical condition.
Elliott, LPCC, NCC : Furthermore, your stepdaughter is enabling him to do this, and this makes it harder. You are facing a "gang" of two, not just one person, which makes it harder for him to think for himself. You have to battle against two.
Elliott, LPCC, NCC : If the main concern for now is economic, you might have to move and put yourself in a safer economic situation.
Elliott, LPCC, NCC : I shall keep you in my prayers.
Elliott, LPCC, NCC : Please get back to me for further assistance.
Elliott, LPCC, NCC : Warm regards,
Elliott, LPCC, NCC : Elliott
Customer: I figured this is what has been going on with him. His family has a history of Bipolar disorder and his father was on SSI for this. He has always stated that he has anxiety but has never been this destructive.
Customer: I will do what is necessary for myself. I highly doubt that he will seek treatment. We have been in counseling before and when things are brought to the surface. He does not want to continue therapy.
Customer: I just needed confirmation of what my perception is.
Customer: Thanks,
Customer: Yolanda
Elliott, LPCC, NCC
Elliott, LPCC, NCC, Psychotherapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 7,664
Experience: 35 years of experience as a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, National Certified Counselor and a college professor.
Verified
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Elliott, LPCC, NCC
Elliott, LPCC, NCC
Elliott, LPCC, NCC, Psychotherapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 7,664
7,664 Satisfied Customers
Experience: 35 years of experience as a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, National Certified Counselor and a college professor.

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I can go as far as to say it could have resulted in saving my sons life and our entire family now knows what bipolar is and how to assist and understand my most wonderful son, brother and friend to all who loves him dearly. Thank you very much

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I thank-you so much! It really helped to have this information and confirmation. We will watch her carefully and get her in for the examination and US right away if things do not improve. God bless you as well!

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