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TherapistMarryAnn, Therapist
Category: Mental Health
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Experience:  Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues.
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Kate McCoy I have a problem of negative muttering of bad

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Hello Kate McCoy I have a problem of negative muttering of bad words. I have had this problem since about a year and a half later after the night supervisor arrived. I believe he is the primary reason for this. Hearing him swear every night and to himself working in the aisle. Hearing him run down the other workers and also hearing him verbally abuse me to other co workers. He also has said to me that if the job was done properly, I would not have to be this long working in the aisle. When I asked him what am I not doing properly, he could not answer me. I also suffered from verbal abuse back on days being blamed for an egg accident that wasn't my fault. Hearing people call me names as they walk by or behind my back. I did not know them and they did not know me. I am afraid this negative muttering has carried on outside of the workplace. An example, as I was leaving the bank I heard a lady say he just called you a bad name. There are many times I am left thinking did I just say that? I do not want the person near me to think I am referring to him or her. A former co worker told me to eliminate negative muttering, try to think about good things instead of bad. Just try to always think of happy thoughts. For me it would be a pleasant aroma. I find I am pressing my lips hard around people, either inside or outside of workplace as I am afraid I will say one or two bad words and I do not want the person near me to think I am referring to him or her. I do not want to be left thinking did I just say that? One lady told me that the reason I have this negative muttering of bad words is because I am anxious I am going to make a mistake. I need to stop these anxious negative thoughts that I am having. Are there any books Kate you can recommend to me that will stop me from having these anxious negative thoughts and will also stop me from this negative muttering of bad words. I now live in a new city and I am afraid of having a bad image because of this negative talk of one or two bad swear words.

Would these books help me to stop having anxious negative thoughts and to stop negative muttering?

How to master anxiety ***** *****

Conscious calm Laura Maciuika

Thank you for your help.

Hello, it's good to hear from you again!
I'm sorry to hear that you are struggling with negative muttering and thoughts. It can be very distressing to feel that you have little to no control over what you say or think. But with some research and a bit of work, you can change this habit.
The two books you wrote about seem to be helpful. The one, Conscious calm, says it integrates both Eastern thought and Western thought which may or may not be helpful to you based on your own personal beliefs. But you may be able to use other parts of it to help yourself.
It could be that you are saying bad words out loud because of an OCD disorder. If you feel it is involuntary at all, that could be the cause. It could also be a tic which is anxiety based. You may want to talk to your doctor about the possibility just to rule it out.
Here are some other excellent anxiety resources that I use a lot that may help you:
On line links:
The Anxiety and Phobia Workbook by Edmund J. Bourne
The Cognitive Behavioral Workbook for Anxiety: A Step-by-Step Program by William J. Knaus EdD and Jon Carlson PsyD EdD
Coping with Anxiety: 10 Simple Ways to Relieve Anxiety, Fear & Worry by Edmund J. Bourne and Lorna Garano
Support groups:
Here is some information about tics:
And about OCD:
Let me know if you need more resources,
Customer: replied 4 years ago.

Thank you Kate for your book recommendations and the several anxiety resources to further look into this problem. One other lady I emailed from her own site said to help prevent negative muttering and to help prevent anxious thoughts, I need to work on three areas. Hypnosis, self esteem and confidence. She said the reason I am having negative muttering is that I am anxious I will make a mistake.

Do you feel that hypnosis can help me in addition to the books you provided or just try the books first and if I need more help then to go try hpnosis? If hypnosis is also worth a try, which hypnosis CDs would you recommend to prevent anxious negative thoughts and to prevent negative muttering?

Thank you.

It is always good to talk to you Kate. I miss you.

I miss talking to you as well. I'm glad you contacted me :)
I would try the books first before hypnosis. You want to try the least intervention to see if it works before you try something that may cost you a lot and involve longer term treatment.
If you opt for hypnosis, I would recommend doing hypnosis in person with someone who is skilled in guiding you through the process. Using CD's may aid in your relaxation, but I'm not sure they could help you with the negative muttering beyond that.
If you do want to try an audio CD just to learn to let go and relax this one might work well for you:
The Calming Collection - Goodbye Worries. ** Guided meditation to train your mind to quiet your thoughts - Train... by Roberta Shapiro and M.Ed.
TherapistMarryAnn and other Mental Health Specialists are ready to help you
Thank you so much for the positive rating and bonus! That was very kind of you. Please stay in touch and anytime I can help, let me know.
Take care,