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KansasTherapist, LSCSW
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 566
Experience:  17 years experience with depression, abuse, and borderline.
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How does a wife cope with husband that has a

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how does a wife cope with husband that has a negative-fault-finding type personality
KansasTherapist : Hello
KansasTherapist : Often times people like your husband don't think there is anything wrong with their comments. They see themselves as just speaking their mind.
KansasTherapist : At the same time, it sounds like your husband may have his feelings hurt easily, so that when you ignor him, he feels bad.
KansasTherapist : This kind of person can be very hard to work out problems with because the are offended by anything that might be critrical. Sometimes it works to ask them to do something differently without pointing out what they do that you don't like. For example,
KansasTherapist : Rather than asking them to stop telling you what you're doing wrong, ask them to tell you more often what you're doing that they like.

How would I suggest that he may need medication to help - he is also an obsessive compulsive and a hoarder.

KansasTherapist : You could say, "When you tell me what I'm doing that makes you happy, I know better what direction to go.
KansasTherapist : Does he take any other medications now?

High Blood Pressure medication is all.

KansasTherapist : Too often, people feel like taking mood medications means they're crazy. You could point out he seems unhappy a lot of the time, and wonder if there is a medicine that would help him feel better. If he is reluctant, you can tell him how important it is to you that he's happy. See if he will do it for your sake.

Okay, I will try that - thanks for the help. C.

KansasTherapist : You're more than welcome.
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