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Dr. Olsen
Dr. Olsen, Psychologist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 2336
Experience:  PsyD Psychologist
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Olsen In addition I am wondering as to whether or not I

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For Dr. Olsen In addition I am wondering as to whether or not I should address some of these issues with this person's mother. This girl is very secretive and keeps many of her social and family relationships very separate. I am a bit obsessive compulsive myself and pay attention to minute details. I seem to be 1. the only person that notices these flaws and characteristics and 2. the only one who seems to really want to help. This girl smokes marijuana on a daily basis and becomes fixated on where she can get more if even a day goes by and she does not have it. When she indulges in drinking she always drinks heavily and pukes (sometimes hurting herself). She takes moderate to large doses of hydrocidone and xanax etc... She was hospitalized for one week back in Feb 18 of this year and was put on medication for being bipolar. I immediately noticed that she seemed distanced and she was making her depression and anxiety more apparent. She seems to have cut herself off from her friends a lot as of recently saying "I have to be good and do well in school and find a way to get to mortuary school and get a job" etc... However now she has been missing school on a regular basis. She is a senior in high school and is marginal on getting the GPA she needs to reach these goals. Even recently she has said to me that she does not feel like her mom loves her (which is most definitely not true). I am a 20 year old college student and I am the guy that she had this most recent relationship with after we had been casual friends for about 2 years. Her behavior left me angry and confused and I have received counseling of my own as a result. The last time that I saw her was April 17. I confronted her about a multitude of things and was so caught up in my own pain that I over reacted and things got physical (I did not physically hurt her but I know that I scared her badly). Her family remains oblivious to a lot of her behavior and would probably think that I was crazy if I brought these subjects up with them. She will not communicate with me at all now (understandable) but I really love this person. She is very intelligent and has a lot of potential... knows what she wants to do with her life. She has been seeing a therapist weekly for years now but I have watched her behavior get consistently worse over the 2 years that I have known her (unbiased opinion). I hate to see her continue on a path to self destruction and feel I have an obligation to somehow help her in whatever way possible. If left up to her I know that she will fight to the bitter end to receive additional help. Is there anything that I can possibly do???
Submitted: 5 years ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Dr. Olsen replied 5 years ago.
Hi there,
Thank you for your reply.
I'll be offline this morning due to my other duties but will be back to JA late afternoon.
I'll be back with my answer later.
Feel free to add any new reply in the meantime.
Please wait if you can.
Customer: replied 5 years ago.
That's fine and I appreciate it. I know this isn't really a mental health question but rather a search for advice on how to help someone who does not want help. Whenever you get a chance to answer thanks
Expert:  Dr. Olsen replied 5 years ago.
Hi there,
Thank you for waiting. I had to be away from JA all day due to my patient work outside.
I can imagine how worried you must have been about your friend.
You really know her true situation. I can feel you care about her a lot.
I would try to talk to her mom about your concerns, though I am not sure of your friend's reaction to you.
It sounds like her mom (and dad) may not be aware of her social behavior. Her family may be dysfunctional. Or her parents may be in denial of their daughter's problems.
Her marijuana addiction and alcohol abuse are a red flag of her recovery; these addiction may aggravate her mood swings.
Her current treatment are not helping her condition much as she continues to use pot and alcohol and seems to be failing from school.
She also feels she is not loved by her mom. Perhaps, her and her mom may need family counseling as well as her counseling.
I can understand why she (or her behavior)hurt you and left you angry and confused as she suffers from wild mood swings and possible personality disorders that she may have developed since childhood.
You love her dearly. So, her behavior hurt you. Her post and alcohol abuse will not help your friend to get better as these will worsen her condition.
If you want to do something to help her condition, you may write a letter regarding your concern to her parents and/or even her therapist. Your concerns are valid. Her continued use of marijuana and alcohol will not help her to get better, even she attends counseling weekly. Hopefully, her therapist should know her current condition.
Your friend may need an intensive inpatient treatment.
Please let me know if you have a question.
All the best,
Customer: replied 5 years ago.
Also do I have your permission to share the feedback that you have given me? I have brought up my concerns to this person's counselor at her school but was told that they can not use your input as this violates a confidentiality dilemma. Thank you for all of your help.
Expert:  Dr. Olsen replied 5 years ago.
Hi there, Thank you for your reply.
So, you already talked to her counselor about your concerns. Then, her counselor knows your friend's situation. That's good. She or he may encourage her not use drugs and attend school.
JustAnswer don't permit customers to state any person's name(s) and phone number etc.
I provide only general advice (for educational and informational purposes) to customers including you.
You don't need my permission to bring up your concerns to her parents.
But, you are not sure of your friend's, her parents' responses and her parents' action to help your friend. Your concerns are genuine and valid. I think her parents will listen to you.
But, remember that ultimately her parents and her doctor & counselor may help your friend to get well as they are directly involved with her treatment. Of course, other people who care about her well-being like you, her friends, relatives etc.. may be of help to her in some way.
Please let me know if you have a question. All the best,
Customer: replied 5 years ago.
Understood and thanks again this has all been very helpful. Peace.
Expert:  Dr. Olsen replied 5 years ago.
Hi there,
You are very welcome.
Let me know if you have any question now and in the future.
I wish the very best to you and your friend.
Dr. Olsen and 2 other Mental Health Specialists are ready to help you