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TherapistMarryAnn, Therapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 5809
Experience:  Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues.
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Kate. Court was .... ummm ...... interesting to say the

Customer Question

Hey Kate. Court was .... ummm ...... interesting to say the least. And the day is just getting more interesting. Uggh. Why can’t people just get along? (Of course, if that were the case, I would have no job, but ... they could get along sometimes).
I have so much I have to get done today, but it is well on its way, thankfully. The more distracted I am at work today, probably the better.
I know you are right about all these things. And I know I will be safe. I felt better when you explained that what happened with the EMDR almost certainly could not happen with this type of therapy. And I know Linda will be super-diligent after what happened (I just hope not diligent to the point that if/when I start feeling something, she stops me – that, too, would defeat the purpose).
I just have a natural aversion to feeling bad and upset. :) doesn’t everyone? I know it will (should) be worth it, and that’s why I am going ahead with it, but it doesn’t mean I have to look forward to it. It’s like knowing that once I have surgery and recover, whatever health issue I had will be better – but it doesn’t make the surgery or recovery any more pleasant.
I can’t believe what a foul mood I am in – and Court this morning didn’t help. I got what I wanted, but I was so irritated. And I couldn’t keep my mouth shut. I interrupted one of the other attorneys 3-4 times. I would apologize to the judge, but then the judge would pick up on whatever I interrupted with. So it was effective – but not ordinarily how I handle myself in Court, and I think the judge is probably (justifiably) a bit irritated. Oh well. Since I have practiced regularly in front of this judge for almost 14 years, and I don’t usually do that, he probably assumed I had reason to be irritated with what the other attorney was saying (which I did, but still) .... Oh well. Fun times. Fun times. The Judge did say something to me about getting a life – that I shouldn’t be working at 7:00 pm on a Sunday evening (he had sent an email about an order, and I emailed him right back and had the info right there with me). He said it was sad what the practice of law has come to. I pointed out that he was obviously working at 7:00 p.m. on a Sunday night, because he sent the email to which I responded. He is a pretty nice guy.
Well, I’m trying to breathe deeply and not worry about this evening. I didn’t get a chance to write down the stuff I wanted to go over initially (I should have done it when I was laying in bed not sleeping) .... but if I have a chance I may take down some notes.
Submitted: 5 years ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  TherapistMarryAnn replied 5 years ago.

Shay, sounds like work was a lot of fun! You do work a lot. I could not imagine putting up with the things you have to deal with, then add to it the long hours.

It is very natural to not want to feel upset, scared or even just unsettled. And even knowing it will make you feel better in the long run doesn't make it easier. But as with surgery, if you don't do it, the pain is much worse. Of course, not doing it is always an option. Many people choose to avoid therapy for those reasons. But I don't believe that you could, even as much as you want to. You are too healthy inside and your drive to get better is strong.

It sounds like some of your feelings came through in court today. I imagine it was anger, fear or frustration. It could also be partly a need to get out some of the pent up emotions you have been feeling lately. You went through a bout of depression and now you are facing your feelings from the past. And it also could be about the past. Expressing some of those feelings in a socially acceptable way (though not an approved way according t0 the judge!) is possible. What do you think?

I'm not sure what time your therapy is tonight and if it's possible to let me know how it went (or even if you will feel up to that) but I'd be interested if you want to write. I will be thinking of you.


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Customer: replied 5 years ago.


I haven't been working the hours I should and haven't been as productive during those hours, which is why I am so flippin' behind. But that's getting much better. LP told the judge this morning that he didn't see the email string yet because at that time he was working in his garden, and he had gone straight to Court for the hearing this morning. The Judge congratulated him for apparently being the only one who has a life. The funny thing is that LP works ALL the time. He comes in super late every day, but works late in the evening every day and weekends always. He just doesn't like to admit that he has no idea how to email or use a computer, and he barely uses his cell phone for calls, even, let alone to text or email. He dictates his emails to people. LP is the one out of all of us who really does have no life. It made me chuckle.

I will try to post when I get back from my appointment this evening. It is at 5:00, and I usually don't get home until almost 7:00, but you can read it tomorrow morning.

I'm sure it will go fine.


Expert:  TherapistMarryAnn replied 5 years ago.

It's good you are getting caught up. I don't like being behind in my work either so I can sympathize!

LP doesn't use email or a computer? Seriously? How in the world does he get by?

Don't worry about posting tonight if you don't feel up to it. I can catch you tomorrow at my usual time if you have time then. I just want to be sure you feel ok with how it went tonight.

Good night, Shay,


Customer: replied 5 years ago.
I started a new thread .... Things are good, I think. :)
Customer: replied 5 years ago.
Kate- I forgot to respond about what you said about how I was in court this morning. I guess it coul be any of those things. I don't know. I think it is partially because I was/am really tired. Maybe, too, because I've been and am so frustrated but this was something I could kind of do something about. And although it likely irritated the judge, it was more socially acceptable than sitting at my desk in tears or yelling at people that aren't here or hiring random things. And it turned out to be effective, although that's not the kind of attorney I want to be.
I was thinking that maybe it was because I need to take control of what I can. I was pretty impatient at the office today too. But it occurs to me that how I was acting wasn't on control - it was out of control. Why do you think??
Oh - and I meant to tell you, when I was telling you I spoke to my parents - they called me again yesterday. My mom was telling me thaty cousin decided where to go to get her doctorate (she's 22 and brilliant - getting her Phd in some kind of micro-engineering). My mom was telling me that their family was taking a week to settle her in. I commented that that was nice, considering my mom didn't even come to take me to undergrad, let alone either of them help meivw to law school, and my dad didn't even stay for any of the parents stuff for undergrad. She said "yes I did". I had to get my dad to back me up on it. She said "wow. I wasn't being a very good mother.". I thought that was interesting.
Also- I sent Lp's wife an email telling her thanks for being play with me coming back. She never responded. But she did send me a bday card. That's something, isn't it? I can deal if she goes back to her old ways. But it would be so much nicer to get at least a honeymoon period with her.
Okay ... I'm sorry I'm babbling. I guess I just wanted to talk. A little nervous about going to bed. But I guess I better try. I can't afford another night with little sleep.
So. Goodnight. :)
Expert:  TherapistMarryAnn replied 5 years ago.
Shay, since we have two threads going I thought I'd transfer this post to the new one, to make it easier for me to respond. See you there!

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