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Dr. Olsen
Dr. Olsen, Psychologist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 2336
Experience:  PsyD Psychologist
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I have a grown daughter, mother of two wonderful toddlers

Resolved Question:

I have a grown daughter, mother of two wonderful toddlers who is currently in a treatment facility. I understand my guilt and anxiety, but now I am facing a possible surgery date to reverse an emergeny colonostomy that was done last June. My emergency surgery and life threating illness after were mentioned in the last "blog" she published...I don't know what to do -
Submitted: 5 years ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Dr. Olsen replied 5 years ago.
Thank you for writing in JustAnswer.
I'm sorry to hear about your daughter's situation.
Let me ask you a few questions first.
What did she write about your surgery in her blog?
Does she have emotional problems associated with you?
Is there a specific question I can assist you with?
Please let me know by clicking on “Reply” and I will then craft my response.
I look forward to hearing from you.
Warm Regards,
Customer: replied 5 years ago.

She wrote than it was the most exhausting time - she was a brand new mother and was there constantly - it was a very scary time for her and her sister. She took the brunt of the burden because her sister had a full time job. She also wrote that she did not feel the same being seperated from her 8 week old son as she did with the first

I do not believe she has any emotional issues with me - her sister does - but she was my life support during those days.

I am afraid to schedule my surgery - I have delayed it until I have the cash available, work is secure, but I do not want to upset her, worry her.........However, I really do want the colostomy reversed and get back to a normal life. I wonder if I am selfish to want the surgery - or should I wait? Not informing her also sounds like a really bad decision.

Expert:  Dr. Olsen replied 5 years ago.
Hi there,
Thank you for waiting.
I'm so sorry to hear about your situation.
It sounds like your daughter with two children are in treatment now.
Does she have depression?
I can imagine how sad and anxious you must have felt about her condition.
So, you read her blog stating her stressful experience in a treatment facility.
At the same time, you want the colonostomy reversal surgery. You want to schedule it now. But, you are worried about your daughter's reaction as she is struggling with her emotions now.
I understand your feelings for her - your surgery may worry her.
I think you should schedule the surgery if your doctor recommended it.
Remember your daughter need and want you.
You have to get well and take care of your health too.
Your decision may worry her.
In the long run, your health matters to everyone.
Perhaps, you mat talk to her about your surgery and encourage her not to worry and focus her treatment.
I hope you get well via the surgery.
Please let me know if you have more questions or I have overlooked any. Warm regards,
Dr. Olsen and other Mental Health Specialists are ready to help you