Mental Health

Have Mental Health Questions? Ask a Psychiatrist Online

Ask an Expert,
Get an Answer ASAP!

Mental Health

My husband and daughter-in-law are always butting heads. The

Customer Question
My husband and daughter-in-law are...
My husband and daughter-in-law are always butting heads. The last incident made me so nervous. She brought her new baby over for us to watch because she said that she didn't want to expose the baby to all those germs where she was going. As soon as she returned the baby started to cry and when she went to pick up the baby my husband said wash your hands. She grabbed for the baby again and my husband didn't give the baby to her so she washed her hands and then took the baby. The next day our son called and told his dad that his wife was upset about being asked to wash her hands before she could pick up her own baby. Our son recommened that we all meet at their house to discuss the matter and it was a shouting match mostly on my husbands part. He felt that he was protecting the baby from
germs and the daughter-in-law said that she felt that he was treating her like a child and he acted like it was his baby. She mentioned that she pushed the baby out, not him. Our
son tried to bring resolution by telling his dad that he didn't need to be as involved. His wife has called us and asked for many, many favors before this point. Now she says she doesn't want to come to our house because she feels like she has to walk on eggshells around my husband and he says that he feels the same way. In the meantime our son is in the middle and is hurt and doesn't know what to do. It seems that both parties feel that
they are right and is not planning to pull back for the sake of our son who is in the middle and the sake of the family.
Submitted: 5 years ago.Category: Mental Health
Show More
Show Less
Ask Your Own Mental Health Question
Answered in 9 minutes by:
3/8/2012
Mental Health Professional: Dr-A-Greene, Psychologist replied 5 years ago
Dr-A-Greene
Dr-A-Greene, Psychologist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 309
Experience: Clinical and Forensic Psychologist
Verified
Dr-A-Greene :

You mentioned that you have done her many favors in the past - can you explain more?

Customer:

We have baby sat for her oldest daughter, who is not our son's, many times.

Customer:

I have gone to court with her three times, I have gone to the

Customer:

doctor with her while she was pregnant several times.

Dr-A-Greene :

Okay, so there is a precident there about you babysitting - that's not new. Have she and your husband butted heads on the older daughter?

Customer:

My husband has taken her to the hospital.

Customer:

Yes. We visited them soon after the baby got home from the

Customer:

hospital and my husband asked the older daughter for a kiss

Customer:

but she kissed the baby instead. Someone told the

Customer:

older daughter to give him a kiss and he refused to kiss her.

Customer:

The daughter in law had a fit and had our son call his

Customer:

dad the following day and came over to discuss it.

Customer:

After a week of not communicating, the daughter in law

Customer:

called and they discussed it and he apologized and they made up.

Dr-A-Greene :

Were there problems between them before the birth of the second child? Both incidents you described were within that period.

Customer:

I told my husband that I would have handled it differently

Customer:

because she is only four.

Customer:

Yes. My husband told her that she should go back to school

Customer:

and get a degree like our son. She had a fit and said that

Customer:

she thought that my husband didn't think she was good enoughh.

Customer:

All other times seemed to have been OK.

Dr-A-Greene :

Alright. The pattern seems to be that they get in an argument, she tells your son, he contacts dad and they eventually make up. Does this sound about right?

Customer:

Yes, but they didn't make up this last time.

Dr-A-Greene :

Okay. Well, unfortunately, I don't think you are going to be able to change the behavior of your husband or your daughter-in-law (who both could have done things differently). But what's important in this situation is that you continue to have a relationship with your grandson. Have you tried getting together with your son (alone) and explaining that you would like a relationship with the grandson under whatever conditions he and his wife find it favorable?

Customer:

Not yet.

Customer:

This last incident just happened yesterday.

Dr-A-Greene :

It might be worthwhile to do this rather than trying to fix the rift between husband and daughter-in-law. If they butt heads, that may always be the case. Your son getting in the middle all the time will just cause resentment and he will be forced to choose (a battle that his wife will win, I imagine). No one wants to keep putting him in that position. So, the best thing to do would be to take the contentious relationship out of the equation and focus on the relationship with your son and grandson.

Dr-A-Greene :

It says that you left the chat - I hope this answer was acceptable - please let me know if you need anything else.

Dr-A-Greene
Dr-A-Greene, Psychologist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 309
Experience: Clinical and Forensic Psychologist
Verified
Dr-A-Greene and 87 other Mental Health Specialists are ready to help you
Ask your own question now
Ask Dr-A-Greene Your Own Question
Dr-A-Greene
Dr-A-Greene
Dr-A-Greene, Psychologist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 309
309 Satisfied Customers
Experience: Clinical and Forensic Psychologist

Dr-A-Greene is online now

A new question is answered every 9 seconds

How JustAnswer works:

  • Ask an ExpertExperts are full of valuable knowledge and are ready to help with any question. Credentials confirmed by a Fortune 500 verification firm.
  • Get a Professional AnswerVia email, text message, or notification as you wait on our site. Ask follow up questions if you need to.
  • 100% Satisfaction GuaranteeRate the answer you receive.

JustAnswer in the News:

Ask-a-doc Web sites: If you've got a quick question, you can try to get an answer from sites that say they have various specialists on hand to give quick answers... Justanswer.com.
JustAnswer.com...has seen a spike since October in legal questions from readers about layoffs, unemployment and severance.
Web sites like justanswer.com/legal
...leave nothing to chance.
Traffic on JustAnswer rose 14 percent...and had nearly 400,000 page views in 30 days...inquiries related to stress, high blood pressure, drinking and heart pain jumped 33 percent.
Tory Johnson, GMA Workplace Contributor, discusses work-from-home jobs, such as JustAnswer in which verified Experts answer people’s questions.
I will tell you that...the things you have to go through to be an Expert are quite rigorous.

What Customers are Saying:

I can go as far as to say it could have resulted in saving my sons life and our entire family now knows what bipolar is and how to assist and understand my most wonderful son, brother and friend to all who loves him dearly. Thank you very much

Corrie MollPretoria, South Africa

I thank-you so much! It really helped to have this information and confirmation. We will watch her carefully and get her in for the examination and US right away if things do not improve. God bless you as well!

ClaudiaAlbuquerque, NM

Outstanding response time less than 6 minutes. Answered the question professionally and with a great deal of compassion.

KevinBeaverton, OR

Suggested diagnosis was what I hoped and will take this info to my doctor's appointment next week.
I feel better already! Thank you.

ElanorTracy, CA

Thank you to the Physician who answered my question today. The answer was far more informative than what I got from the Physicians I saw in person for my problem.

JulieLockesburg, AR

You have been more help than you know. I seriously don't know what my sisters situation would be today if you had not gone above and beyond just answering my questions.

John and StefanieTucson, AZ

I have been dealing with an extremely serious health crisis for over three years, and one your physicians asked me more questions, gave me more answers and encouragement than a dozen different doctors who have been treating me!!

Janet VPhoenix, AZ

< Previous | Next >

Meet the Experts:

Dr. Keane

Dr. Keane

Therapist

1,379 satisfied customers

Clinical Psychology PhD, Licensed Professional Counselor with experience in marriage/family, teens and child psychology.

TherapistMarryAnn

TherapistMarryAnn

Therapist

4,021 satisfied customers

Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues.

Dr. Olsen

Dr. Olsen

Psychologist

2,336 satisfied customers

PsyD Psychologist

Norman M.

Norman M.

Principal psychotherapist in private practice. Newspaper contributor, over 2000 satisfied clients on JA

2,246 satisfied customers

ADHP(NC), DEHP(NC), ECP, UKCP Registered.

Dr. Michael

Dr. Michael

Psychologist

2,177 satisfied customers

Licensed Ph.D. Clinical Health Psychology with 30 years of experience in private practive and as a clinical psychology university professor.

Steven Olsen

Steven Olsen

Therapist

1,728 satisfied customers

More than twenty years of expertise in counseling, psychological diagnosis and education

Anna

Anna

Mental Health Professional

1,656 satisfied customers

Licensed Clinical Social Worker with 29 years in addictions and mental health.

< Previous | Next >

Related Mental Health Questions
I have a question about derealization. story short i had
i have a question about derealization. Long story short i had anxiety for years/still do. I was prescribed some sort of benzo and took it as needed for some years. Sometimes i would take this daily fo… read more
Dr. Vikas
Dr. Vikas
Associate Professor
M.D (Psychiatry)
33 satisfied customers
My Dr. took me off xanax that I have been in for 15years,
My Dr. took me off xanax that I have been in for 15years, cold turkey, I can stand it. I also keep testing positive for meth. I am not on meth, I tried it years ago and my horrible anxiety will not to… read more
Linda D.
Linda D.
Master\u0027s Degree
794 satisfied customers
I had been on Ativan for awhile because of severe anxiety.
I had been on Ativan for awhile because of severe anxiety. My psychiatrist recently switched me to klonopin to help with the weaning process. I still seem to have anxiety and nausea. Is this a common … read more
Dr. Kaushik
Dr. Kaushik
PSYCHIATRIST ( MD Psychiatry)
Doctoral Degree
204 satisfied customers
I suffer from OCD, anxiety and depression. My OCD manifests
Hello Everyone,I suffer from OCD, anxiety and depression. My OCD manifests itself in several ways: religious, bad thoughts, health anxiety, running over someone with my car...it's awful!For the past m… read more
Dr. Kaushik
Dr. Kaushik
PSYCHIATRIST ( MD Psychiatry)
Doctoral Degree
204 satisfied customers
Leah,how are you? I have been doing a lot better with
Hi Leah,how are you? I have been doing a lot better with controlling the compulsions but I had a trigger yeasterday after watching a tv dissociative amesia this is not what's happened to me?… read more
LeahMSWuofm
LeahMSWuofm
Clinical Social Worker
Master\u0027s Degree
768 satisfied customers
I think I have some form of an obsession linked with extreme
I think I have some form of an obsession linked with extreme jealousy for the past 6 years. I am really jealous of my boyfriend's family. I do not want him to see them or spend time with them at all. … read more
JohnMichaels,MS,LPC
JohnMichaels,MS,LPC
Counselor
Master\u0027s Degree
170 satisfied customers
There's a psychological term used for a tactic one uses
There's a psychological term used for a tactic one uses during arguments where one person attempts to withdraw and the other follows them from room to room, blocks them from leaving a room, blocks tv,… read more
LeahMSWuofm
LeahMSWuofm
Clinical Social Worker
Master\u0027s Degree
768 satisfied customers
I'm an only child and my parents live overseas. I'm married
I'm an only child and my parents live overseas. I'm married with a beautiful daughter who just turned one. Every time my mother comes to visit me, she stays with us for a few weeks. A few days before … read more
TherapistJen
TherapistJen
Licensed Clinical Social Worker
Master\u0027s Degree
953 satisfied customers
I am a 25 year old male Earlier I was attracted only to
I am a 25 year old male Earlier I was attracted only to women. I broke up with my girlfriend. But now days I am attracted to men as well. And I prefer dressing like a women. I am confused as why it is… read more
LeahMSWuofm
LeahMSWuofm
Clinical Social Worker
Master\u0027s Degree
768 satisfied customers
Dueck - Living here in the country of Belize. I think it's
My name is***** - Living here in the country of Belize. I think it's verbal abuse that I experienced for many years. Not from my marriage partner. I have been thinking that I suffer from trauma. Just … read more
JohnMichaels,MS,LPC
JohnMichaels,MS,LPC
Counselor
Master\u0027s Degree
170 satisfied customers
I'd like to know about my confidentiallity rights before
Hi, I'd like to know about my confidentiallity rights before describing my situation. … read more
JohnMichaels,MS,LPC
JohnMichaels,MS,LPC
Counselor
Master\u0027s Degree
170 satisfied customers
Are you? marryann as you are fully aware my intrusive
Hi are you? marryann as you are fully aware my intrusive thought is 'what if i killied someone in past and forgotten' and the compulsive nature is reviewing my past memories! What I what to know is I'… read more
TherapistMarryAnn
TherapistMarryAnn
Therapist
Master's Degree
4,021 satisfied customers
Is my gf avoidant attachment type or secure... or a little
Is my gf avoidant attachment type or secure... or a little of each? Im an insecure anxious attachment type for sure.... i always need reassurance and stuff from my gf... my gf in the beginning was alr… read more
TherapistMarryAnn
TherapistMarryAnn
Therapist
Master's Degree
4,021 satisfied customers
I just had a one night stand with a younger man, who said
I just had a one night stand with a younger man, who said afterwards that we should repeat this eventually, but then I sent some stupid text messages and an email which was way too intense and probabl… read more
TherapistJen
TherapistJen
Licensed Clinical Social Worker
Master\u0027s Degree
953 satisfied customers
If a child cried after leaving a bonding assessment with a
Second opinion] If a child cried after leaving a bonding assessment with a mother (because she didn't want to leave the mother) would the therapist likely say the child has abandonment issues or would… read more
LeahMSWuofm
LeahMSWuofm
Clinical Social Worker
Master\u0027s Degree
768 satisfied customers
How do I deal with severe abandonment issues? I am
How do I deal with severe abandonment issues? I am constantly afraid of people around me hurting me or leaving me. … read more
JohnMichaels,MS,LPC
JohnMichaels,MS,LPC
Counselor
Master\u0027s Degree
170 satisfied customers
I live in Pennsylvania and I'm looking for an expert in the
i live in Pennsylvania and I'm looking for an expert in the area of Cluster B personality Disorders … read more
Linda D.
Linda D.
Master\u0027s Degree
794 satisfied customers
My mother watches my 2 children ages 7 and 4, 3 times a
My mother watches my 2 children ages 7 and 4, 3 times a week. She has been divorced from my fathers for 30+ years but still harbors resentment towards him. Growing up she told us things about the divo… read more
LeahMSWuofm
LeahMSWuofm
Clinical Social Worker
Master\u0027s Degree
768 satisfied customers
Disclaimer: Information in questions, answers, and other posts on this site ("Posts") comes from individual users, not JustAnswer; JustAnswer is not responsible for Posts. Posts are for general information, are not intended to substitute for informed professional advice (medical, legal, veterinary, financial, etc.), or to establish a professional-client relationship. The site and services are provided "as is" with no warranty or representations by JustAnswer regarding the qualifications of Experts. To see what credentials have been verified by a third-party service, please click on the "Verified" symbol in some Experts' profiles. JustAnswer is not intended or designed for EMERGENCY questions which should be directed immediately by telephone or in-person to qualified professionals.

Disclaimer: Information in questions, answers, and other posts on this site ("Posts") comes from individual users, not JustAnswer; JustAnswer is not responsible for Posts. Posts are for general information, are not intended to substitute for informed professional advice (medical, legal, veterinary, financial, etc.), or to establish a professional-client relationship. The site and services are provided "as is" with no warranty or representations by JustAnswer regarding the qualifications of Experts. To see what credentials have been verified by a third-party service, please click on the "Verified" symbol in some Experts' profiles. JustAnswer is not intended or designed for EMERGENCY questions which should be directed immediately by telephone or in-person to qualified professionals.

Show MoreShow Less

Ask Your Question

x