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psychlady, Therapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 6893
Experience:  Psychotherapist specializing in the treatment of a variety of mental health issues.
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I've suffered from Depression for years but every time I try

Customer Question

I've suffered from Depression for years but every time I try and discuss this with my wife she gets mad and tells me how hard she works to keep things going and that I didn't appologize for spending the last 24 hrs in bed.
I love her but what can I do ?
Thanks , much appreciated
Submitted: 5 years ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  psychlady replied 5 years ago.

If you suffer from depression and you have not gotten relief from seeing psychologists without little results then you should keep looking. I don't want you to feel discouraged but you should ever feel that you are getting no help from any provider. Sometimes a doctor patient relationship has to have a certain fit. Anything less is unacceptable. If you have a good relationship with your psychologist then you won't feel as hopeless when your wife is not as sensitive as you like.

As far as your relationship your wife could attend a session or two to learn how her lack of understanding effects your feelings about your mental health. You have valid concerns and this can be addressed by a professional so that you don't feel so unsupported. Even if she meets with your psychiatrist or doctor that gives you your meds you have a better chance that she will understand your problems. If you want to use a marriage counselor instead that is fine.

There are clinicians that have fee sliding scales or reduced fees if you contact the psychological association in your state. If you think you would rather use self help that is find too. There are resources geared towards communicating your needs to her. Find something regarding communicating your mental health needs to your partner.

Learn how to communicate by using Mars and Venus Together Forever about general things.

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Customer: replied 5 years ago.
I work a 45 hour a week job but some nights I'm so spent mentally that I
just go to bed with even eating supper.

It's been closer to ten years that I've had moderate depression / anxiety
and if I was to put words in her mouth , she'd say she's sick of it and wants
me to be more of the supportive one. Even though on weekends I do all the
honey do list , all vehicle / house maintainance ect.
Expert:  psychlady replied 5 years ago.
It is difficult when someone feels their partner does not support them. You can only continue to be honest. You may say something one time that will make all the difference. You can investigate online therapy and sit together with a professional via computer to help her understand. You can Google etherapy. Or you can use self help information to get her to understand. Copy information that shows her the symptoms. Be proactive